Dale espacio: 12 maneras de evitar el miedo a perderle

¿Quieres saber cómo darle espacio pero sin arriesgarte a perderle en el proceso? Estás en el lugar adecuado.

Al igual que en cualquier relación sentimental duradera, puede llegar un momento en que las cosas parezcan ir mal.

Puede que empiece a mostrarse distante, que las cosas que normalmente parecían ir bien sean cualquier cosa menos eso, y que la compenetración entre vosotros dos parezca un poco rota.

Tu hombre is acting differently, but you just can’t seem to figure out what the hell is going on.

Is it you? Is it something you did or is he simply struggling with something internally and he doesn’t know how to handle it right?

Cuando la comunicación no es sana y uno de los miembros de la pareja actúa fuera de lo normal sin ofrecer ninguna explicación válida de su comportamiento, la relación puede pasar factura.

Sientes que necesita espacio y tienes muchas ganas de dárselo, pero temes que le guste demasiado y se vaya. Entonces, ¿qué haces?

How do you give him the space that he clearly needs, yet at the same time, still make sure he knows you’re there for him, and you desperately want to get to the bottom of whatever is bugging him? How to know what your el hombre quiere de ti?

The first thing that’s important to note here is that guys handle their problems much differently from women.

Normalmente les gusta alejarse un poco y ocuparse de sus cosas internamente.

Se entregan a su trabajo un poco más de lo habitual, como forma de mantenerse distraídos de lo que les preocupa.

They don’t like to hash it over too much, and they rely on their own abilities to solve their issues. Men are just wired differently.

Las dificultades emocionales no les resultan fáciles de afrontar, así que cuando empiezan a sentir la tensión de todo ello, lo manifiestan de formas que pueden resultar perjudiciales para sus relaciones sentimentales.

They usually don’t mean to be that way; it’s just a result of their inability to cope with their issues openly and honestly like women do.

Escucha, por desgracia can’t change cómo es tu pareja. Él es quien es, y tienes que aceptarlo como parte de él y darte cuenta de que no tiene nada que ver contigo.

Everybody has their own way of working out their issues, and you cannot control what happens in somebody’s head and how they react to things and resolve them.

Pero lo que sí puedes controlar es cómo usted reaccionar ante ellos.

Puedes optar por dejar que estas cosas te afecten de forma negativa, sentarte ahí tranquilamente y enfurruñarte, o puedes tratar con ellos como la mujer adulta que eres e intenta que el proceso de darle el espacio que ansía desesperadamente sea lo menos doloroso posible.

Lo más probable es que sólo sea una fase y que pase. Va a encontrar una salida a su dilema emocional y después se disculpará por haber dejado que eso tensara vuestra relación.

You are going to realize that you’ve made a big deal out of nothing, and you’ll be perfectly fine and secure in what you have.

Don’t always trust your head when it goes into panic mode. Sometimes it’s just a little glitch, and it’s only a matter of time before things get resolved.

Don’t panic if you feel like you need to give him some space. That can actually prove to be healthy for your relationship in the long run.

He is going to realize what a great woman he has by his side—one that selflessly lets him deal with his stuff without nagging, and le espera with zero judgment when he’s back to his old self.

Nobody’s perfect, and we all go through our own shit. What really matters is how you choose to come out of it.

Dale el espacio que necesita, pero asegúrate de hacer lo que sea necesario para mantener un estado de ánimo positivo durante todo el proceso.

Aquí tienes 12 formas de darle espacio, con el mínimo riesgo de perderle:

Dale espacio y retrocede un poco

La forma más obvia, y a la vez más eficaz, de darle algo de espacio es hacer exactamente eso.

Accept that this is how it is at this very moment and adjust. Don’t text him all the time, and don’t call too much.

If he isn’t texting you first, don’t initiate conversation every single day because that is the exact opposite of what you’ve promised him.

Si te preguntas qué quiere tu hombre en este momento, hazle caso a tu instinto.

Even if you think you will never be able to help him, the next day you won’t think like that.

Let him figure it all out, and don’t pry too much. I understand it’s extremely difficult backing off from al que amas, but just remember that you’re doing it all for the sake of your relationship.

Si sigues comportándote así, acabará volviendo. Y ese era tu plan desde el principio, ¿verdad?

Let him know you’ll be spending time with your best friend on Saturday, so if he has no plans, you can have brunch on Sunday, but don’t pressure him.

Be casual and chill. He should see you as a source of support and not somebody who can’t dale un poco de tiempo para él when that’s all he really needs.

It’s going to be tricky not receiving that texto de buenas noches from him every night, but it’s crucial that you keep to your word and make him see he can trust you. It’s all going to be okay in the end.

Be supportive of his struggles, respect his space, and let him know that whenever he’s ready, you’re here to talk it all out and figure out where you stand.

Céntrate en ti y deja de poner excusas para contactar con él

If you’ve made a conscious decision to give him space, do just that. You don’t need to make ridiculous excuses to text and call at all times because he will see right through them.

If you keep badgering him after promising to step away for a bit, he’s going to feel pressured and attacked, and it can only negatively affect how things will continue after this.

No, he didn’t forget that you exist, and no, he is not going to get used to a life without you because that is not the point of it all.

The point is that he figures himself out—alone. That’s why you should give him the boyfriend space he craves so much.

Al final del día, pensará de otra manera, y puede que vuelva a ti antes de que lo creas posible.

No tiene nada que ver con usted ni con terceros.

He is going to reach out when he’s ready, and you’ll talk then. If he doesn’t call you today, it doesn’t mean he won’t call you the next day.

Mantén esa positividad y las cosas saldrán mejor de lo que pensabas.

Anything else is just too needy and insecure, and you know that’s not quién eres o cómo quieres que te vea.

También deberías poder disfrutar de tu vida a solas. Hay tantas cosas que ver y tanto que hacer, así que céntrate en todo eso, ¡y el tiempo volará!

When you’re focused on the positives and choose to see the beauty in everything, it usually translates into real life.

Mantén el ánimo y encuentra siempre un motivo para sonreír.

Nada de acosar en las redes sociales.

Esto es contraproducente para darle espacio. No estás en el instituto, enviándole mensajes de amor y preguntándole cuándo vendrá a verte.

Esto es algo serio, y debes tratarlo en consecuencia.

It may seem innocent enough, but if you can’t peel your eyes off his Facebook and Instagram accounts, you’re going to make yourself go mad. The no contact rule is a lifesaver in situations like this.

Ten paciencia y dale su espacio de hombre para que piense en todo.

Don’t stalk him. Don’t keep tabs on who he’s following, whose photos he liked, and the comments he might have posted on somebody’s video. Don’t even try to be sweet and cute by saying ‘hi’ on Snapchat. I

know a lot of women would do something like this, but now you know that it isn’t the right thing.

Por mucho que lo desees, renuncia a mandarle mensajes. Porque, si pasas tanto tiempo centrada en él, te perderás toda la diversión de tu vida.

Don’t mess with your head by imagining scenarios that aren’t real, based on what you see on his redes sociales perfiles.

Just because he went out with his friends the night before, does not mean he’s not struggling.

All it means is he needed a breather. Sympathize with that, and don’t judge.

Recuerda que le dejas solo durante un tiempo porque necesita espacio. Si le gusta pasar tiempo con ciertas personas, acéptalo.

As I’ve already mentioned, people deal with their issues in their own ways. Nobody is right or wrong here. We’re all just finding our way.

Don’t overanalyze things, and keep an open mind. Nobody said it would be easy, but do your best to keep a level head.

Sólo estás empeorando las cosas para ti. Así que nada de redes sociales ni de acoso.

Deja que las cosas vayan a su ritmo y confía en tu chico. Créeme, al final del día estarás muy orgullosa de ti misma si consigues llevarlo todo así.

Don’t interrogate him

Don’t go into it too aggressively. You don’t know the real reasons why your man is pulling away. Maybe he has some issues he doesn’t want to share with you.

Ten en cuenta que ni siquiera él sabe qué demonios pasa por su cabeza, así que tus 20 preguntas no van a hacer que nadie se sienta mejor.

The hardest part is not taking it personally. All you want to know is why he isn’t talking to you and why he can’t just confide in you. What did you do?

And that’s your first mistake. You didn’t do anything. This is his internal problem and he is the only one who can fix it for himself.

You can’t do anything until he takes the initiative and works on his own shit.

Sólo dale espacio de chico, y ver qué pasa después. Piénsalo de esta manera.

If you were mentally (or in any other way) struggling with something but you didn’t really want to talk about it, how would it make you feel if he invaded your personal space and didn’t give you a second to figure it out by yourself?

No es tan agradable, ¿verdad? Así que tenlo en cuenta cada vez que quieras acosarle con preguntas y presionarle innecesariamente.

If you’re going to give him space, try to respect that, and let him come to you when he está listo.

Créeme, lo peor que puede pasar es empujarle a hacer cosas para las que no está preparado.

Don’t chase after him

What’s the point? If he’s going to find his way back, he’s going to do it on his own.

If he chooses someone else, it is okay as well. Love can’t be forced, so why try in the first place?

Don’t make him feel suffocated and pressured into making a decision before he’s ready.

Don’t spend so much time focusing on him. I know a lot of women do this, but I am begging you not to do it. Trust me, it won’t bring you where you want to be. Just do your own thing in your own space.

Don’t resort to any grand gestures or ways to llamar su atención.

That is below you. You know him better than anyone, so you know how that’s going to make him feel.

Mantén la cabeza alta y las esperanzas aún más altas.

If you feel like texting him, just think about it. Will it help you to make him run into your arms? I don’t think so.

Perseguirle hará lo contrario de lo que quieres. Lo alejará aún más y entonces es muy poco probable que quiera... volver.

Don’t make yourself seem desperate and incapable of being on your own.

Eso no es un rasgo atractivo y deberías estar bien sola durante un tiempo.

Just leave the situation as it is, and don’t try to impact the way things turn out. It’s not up to you.

Just have faith he’ll come back to you, and keep yourself preoccupied in the process. Trust me, no contact is what both of you need right now!

Quit thinking you’re losing him

I know it’s stronger than you and that it’s hard to control the scenarios your mind creates. But that is the worst thing that you can do now.

It’s daunting, imagining what he’s up to and what he’s doing without you, but please, quit thinking the worst.

Yes, it’s a fair possibility that he might leave. But giving him his guy space is a must because that is the only way he can stay alone with his thoughts.

Que él decida quedarse solo es, por desgracia, una posible consecuencia de todo esto, y tienes que estar preparada para ello. Pero nada está escrito en piedra.

That is merely the worst case scenario, and guess what? You’ll survive if it comes to it!

Si sigues entrando en estado de pánico, puede que sean tus miedos los que están aflorando y sacando lo mejor de ti.

It is normal to fear losing your partner, but just because it scares you, doesn’t mean you can’t superarlo.

If you can’t help but be a complete and total wreck, perhaps this is not the healthiest relationship for you. Just think about that.

True love doesn’t make you feel nauseated. It doesn’t create twisted scenarios in your head and play juegos mentales contigo.

And most importantly, love doesn’t make you feel insecure. It makes you feel safe, protected, and secure in what you have.

Si te sientes mal cuando está cerca y cuando no está, significa que no es el adecuado para ti. Tal vez serías mucho más feliz con otra persona.

Even during a “timeout,” you wouldn’t be going through this.

Think about that while you’re on your own and try to figure out what it is that’s really scaring you.

Y recuerda que tú diriges tu propia vida y puedes tomar todas las decisiones que creas oportunas.

Cambia tu energía hacia ti mismo

Darle vueltas constantemente en la cabeza te va a restar toda tu energía y positividad.

Thinking about the reasons why men pull away won’t help you to bring your man back.

You’re going to be left jaded and frustrated. Stop while you’re still you! Focus on yourself. Your world is so much bigger than that one person!

I know he’s not just anyone and he’s extremely important to you, but so are many other people, yourself included!

While you’re giving him space, do the same for yourself. Don’t contact him, don’t send text messages and don’t go to places he might be.

Try to find what it is that keeps you happy when he’s not around.

Averigua cuáles son tus pasiones y de dónde vienen tus ganas de vivir.

Concéntrate en tus sentimientos. Trabaja para ponerte en el lugar más saludable posible mental y emocionalmente.

Try to just close your eyes, wash those worries away, and appreciate what’s around you.

Pasa tu tiempo libre con tus mejores amigos y concéntrate más en ellos y en ti mismo.

It’s really easy to be happy; all you need to do is give it a shot! He is special, and he is amazing, but so are you, and so is the rest of your world.

Encuentre tu felicidad en otros lugares, y de repente te sentirás un millón de kilos más ligero.

Pase lo que pase, que sepas que estarás bien.

Remember all those things you didn’t think you’d ever survive? Well, look at you now! Alive, healthy, and thriving! This is the exact same thing.

It may seem like losing him could be the end of the world, but it’s really not.

Even if you did lose him, you’d find your way back to happiness again.

What’s important to know is that you do not need another person to feel whole.

Sólo necesitas un poco de espacio para organizar tus pensamientos mientras le das a él un poco de espacio de hombre. Créeme, es el mejor consejo que te pueden dar.

You’re already a complete, functioning human being all by yourself. Nothing can change that.

Once you are able to be happy and fulfilled when you’re on your own, only then will you be truly ready for whatever may come your way.

While you’re waiting to see if he can find his way back to you, keep your thoughts positive.

Tú eres el único responsable de tu propia vida, y sólo tú puedes hacer que te sientas bien en tu piel.

Make yourself aware that you’ve already survived so much, and you can handle this as well.

So if he chooses a different path, you’ll be ready and able to cope with it in a healthy way.

And if he comes back, you’ll know that you don’t necesita para que seas feliz, pero te encanta que te mantenga así.

Have faith that things always end up the way they’re supposed to

Just because he seems perfect and your relationship is making you so happy, doesn’t necessarily mean that he is perfect for usted.

Todavía puede ser un buen tipono es bueno para ti. Confía en que todo saldrá bien.

If he can’t seem to find his way back and decides to break it off with you, have some faith that this is how it’s supposed to be.

A guy who is right for you would never leave and decide that you’re not destinado a ser together, don’t you think?

You can’t control how a person feels. When he’s not where you are, it’s only fair to let him go.

Let him find what’s right for him, and give yourself a chance to find somebody who will never leave.

Right now, it’s difficult to see this as a fact because you are too emotionally invested, but one day down the line, you’re going to realize that this was in fact true.

When enough time has passed, and when you’re with somebody new who can appreciate you and make you feel secure, you’re going to see how you’re supposed to feel beside the one who’s right for you.

And then, you’ll never let your mind play tricks on you again. People who are meant to be will always gravitate towards each other.

Una gran relación es difícil de desarrollar, por lo que debes tener suficiente paciencia si quieres ser feliz en el amor.

You can’t change how somebody feels, no matter how hard you try

If your man is going through some serious issues and he is really taking his time, accept that you can’t just change how he feels.

Don’t interrogate him about why men pull away and why he is acting like that.

Es el único que tiene poder para sentirse mejor.

Sólo necesita un poco de espacio para organizar sus pensamientos y decidir qué hará a continuación.

Algunos chicos se enfrentarán a cosas así en el instituto, mientras que otros lo harán cuando sean completamente maduros.

It sucks, and it’s so frustrating, but all you can really do is just give him space, take a step back, and hope it all works out in your favor.

Espero que recuperes a tu hombre y que no tengas que volver a pasar por esto.

But at the same time, if things just don’t go the way you want them to, that is okay, too.

Sometimes things need to fall apart in order for you to see what’s really adecuado para usted.

A veces, dejar ir lo que parece bueno para ti es exactamente lo que necesitas para verlo como lo que realmente es.

Never force anything. That is not the foundation upon which you want to base your relationship. If it’s not working out, let it go.

Mientras estás ocupada buscando la manera de hacerle volver, la vida pasa a tu lado.

Open your eyes to it, and you just might find what you’re looking for.

¿De qué sirve tener una buena relación con otra persona si la que tienes contigo mismo es estupenda?

Pregúntate qué tipo de relación quieres realmente

¿El tipo de chico que necesita mucho espacio es alguien con quien realmente quieres estar?

¿Te gusta cómo te hace sentir estar con una persona que no está segura de ti y del tiempo que pasáis juntos? Piénsalo un segundo.

Giving him space is a noble gesture, and sometimes it’s what’s needed, but if he is taking his time, and he demands space more than just that one time, is he really somebody you want to be with?

Is it possible that maybe you’re just not right for each other? That does not have to be the case at all, but if it’s in the least bit possible, it’s worth thinking about.

¿Qué tipo de hombre estás buscando? ¿Lo ves en él?

Si la respuesta es afirmativa, espéralo y mantén la fe.

But if he is leaving you uncomfortable and insecure, perhaps you’re not as happy as you’d like while estar con él.

Repasa tus opciones, pregúntate qué quieres de una relación y persigue exactamente eso.

Pasa tiempo con la gente que te hace feliz

Esta es tu oportunidad perfecta para pasar tiempo de calidad con aquellos que hacen tu vida un poco mejor y te hacen reír un poco más.

Don’t forget about your family and friends. While he is searching for his way back, you focus on other people that you cherish in life.

Go on a night out with your besties, and put your worries to the side! Go visit your family if they don’t leave nearby, and spend a weekend unwinding with them.

Dé un tranquilo paseo por la ciudad; siéntese en un parque y lea un buen libro.

Pero hagas lo que hagas, don’t send him any text messages cuando te quedas solo. Eso lo arruinará todo.

Y sí, esto es algo que aconsejan todos los coaches de relaciones, lo que lo convierte en uno de los mejores consejos sobre relaciones.

Reencuentro con viejos amigos you may have neglected a bit. You’ll see how little it takes to just sé feliz!

And then, whatever he decides, you’ll be able to handle it all right, knowing you have an amazing support system around you that’s not going to let you wander in sorrow.

Esto también te recordará lo querido que eres y lo mucho que la gente se preocupa por ti.

Tu autoestima volverá a estar en lo más alto y tu alma simplemente florecerá.