How to understand women? How to understand their mindsets and whether you are doing the right thing?
How many times how you heard that famous saying: Men and women are from different planets? Oh, seriously?!
Honestly, every time I hear it, my head instantly expands a few inches, waiting for an explosion.
Joking aside, men and women might have different mindsets and different needs, but that doesn’t mean they are living in separate bubbles.
I understand that you, as a man, are having difficulties understanding the opposite sex, but after reading this, you’ll realize that women are not that complicated after all (I can promise you that as a woman).
You’ll realize that all they need is a different approach when it comes to understanding them.
You see, women are by nature more open and emotional than you, and that is why it is so hard for you to comprehend their wishes and intentions.
Now, let’s be honest.
How many times have you been afraid to say anything to a woman because of the thinking that you might insult her (because you don’t understand how they function)? (One too many, I assume.)
How many times how you thought to yourself: “Women are so complex. I will never understand them?”
I feel you. But, once you learn the basics of their nature and how they really function, you will see that everything women want was right here in front of you, but you somehow couldn’t see it.
The truth is that women are not complex at all. It is wrong to categorize them as such because there are also some men who are complicated.
The key to understanding women is realizing that all they want is what is best for them (just like you), but they want different things because they have different needs.
And that is where you reach the difficulty.
What you need to do is start thinking more like a woman than a man, and it will help you understand better the enigma behind all of this.
HOW TO UNDERSTAND WOMEN
Understand That All Women Are Different
Yup. First and foremost, you need to understand that all women are different in terms of their personalities, life goals, expectations, needs, styles, and so on.
Just like men, every woman is an individual in herself. But, don’t get confused here.
All women want the same thing, but they require different approaches.
While some women are more sensitive and require such an approach, others are more free-spirited or hardheaded and thus require more time for you to reach their cores and finally understand them.
They all have different personalities and minds, but they all want to feel loved and secure. They all want to be happy.
They want what’s best for them, and your task is recognizing the key ingredients to their happiness.
Understand That Women Are Not Men
Second, you need to understand that women are not men, and they will never be.
No matter how hard you tried to link them with your “species”, you will just end up wasting your time instead of understanding them.
What does it mean that women are not men?
It means that men are taught from an early age to act masculine, to be tough, and to hide emotions (especially tears).
On the contrary, women are taught the exact opposite, and that is one of the reasons why you struggle so much to decipher them.
You need to understand that a woman’s mind has different settings and different triggers than yours which means that you need to learn when it is time to trigger a particular action or emotion and when it is time to stay still and let them do all the work.
Women Want To Feel Connected
From an early age, a woman’s mind is programmed to seek connection.
Every woman wants to feel connected, and she is doing it via communication, her gestures, paying attention to small details, talking about her emotions, etc.
On the contrary, men establish connection through different ways, and that is why they fail when it comes to understanding how women really function.
You see, women want to feel your presence through your words, actions, and an exchange of warmth.
That is when they feel truly connected with you.
If there is no connection, a woman will feel like something’s wrong, and she will instantly start looking for solutions, telling you that you don’t understand her wishes and needs. Sounds familiar, right?
Women Want To Feel Cared For
Yes, women want to feel cared for, but this doesn’t mean that they want you to do the entire job.
Many men think that if they jump all the time at her every word, she will be satisfied, and she will never be able to accuse you of doing something wrong.
But, jumping at her every word is the worst you could do.
Believe me, no one wants a servant who will be there to fulfill their every wish and who will not have a mind of his own.
Women want to be surprised from time to time; they want to be kissed on their foreheads; they want to be hugged and so on.
Remember that women want attention.
They don’t want expensive gifts in order to feel happy (well, most of them), so don’t think that in order to reach a woman’s core, you need to earn shitloads of money because you don’t.
It’s all about your approach, remember?
Women Want To Be Respected
Above everything else, women want to be respected. They want to be respected and appreciated for who they really are.
They don’t want to feel forced to constantly change in accordance with the circumstances.
They want to be showed respect not only by words, but by actions as well.
When you give a woman a flower, you have no idea what goes through her mind at that moment, right?
Now, I will tell you.
When a woman is given a flower or showed respect one way or another, she instantly feels ten times better in her skin because she is wired emotionally, and little things like that mean the world to her.
So, while to men, those things may seem trivial and sometimes unnecessary, women see it quite differently.
They appreciate every gesture, and take everything to their hearts because they are sensitive about it, and it has enormous value to them.
Women Want To Be Understood Without Having To Explain Themselves
I know it sounds a little bit funny, but it is true.
The biggest amount of misunderstanding between men and women comes right from this hypothesis: that women want to be understood without having to explain themselves (unfortunately, many realize this one too late).
When a woman says things like: You should know what I mean; You should know what to do;, that is exactly what they mean.
They expect men to understand them by observing their words, actions, and gestures.
Many men simply forget that a woman will never say what she really means and wants.
And that is where the clash occurs.
So, paying more attention to these details in future will ultimately help you understand them better and make them feel understood (I’ll also explain it in detail below).
Women Want To Be Loved
If you ask any woman what is her ultimate wish, she will tell you that she just wants to be loved.
But, not many men know how to love a woman properly.
You see, women want to be loved unconditionally; they want to be your priority and to be understood in every aspect of their being.
I know it sounds a little bit too much for you at the moment, but once you absorb the information in full, it will be a piece of cake.
You also need to understand that women are made of two separate parts: emotional and physical.
These two parts are always linked with one another.
So, while men have the tendency to be interested in sex only for the sake of their physical needs, women never do it solely because of that.
They have certain emotional compartments in their brains that need to be taken care of in order to make them ready for the physical aspect.
Now that you’ve learned the key things when it comes to understanding women, here are some more do’s and don’ts that you need to pay attention to in order to become a pro when it comes to the opposite sex.
DO’S AND DON’TS TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND WOMEN BETTER
1. Don’t jump in the problem – solving mode
When a man has a problem, he instantly retreats into his man cave and starts looking for a solution.
He doesn’t eat or sleep until he resolves the riddle. And for men, that has been working perfectly well…until they meet a woman – the opposite species of theirs.
So, when a woman comes back home from a tough day at her job and wants to talk about it with her man, the first thing that comes to his mind is looking for possible solutions instead of just listening to what she has to say.
Am I right?
I believe you know what I’m trying to say to you.
DON’T EVER jump into the problem-solving mode because if you do, you will make it worse.
Just listen to her, nod your head, and sympathize.
2. Show compassion
I understand that showing compassion is one of the most difficult tasks for every man, but understanding woman without doing it would be simply mission impossible.
Everything stems from your ability to be compassionate with your woman.
If you don’t show her that you understand what she is going through, she will no longer feel safe.
You need to hold her hand and look her in the eye when she’s telling you something delicate or sensitive.
She wants to know that you’re there for her no matter what.
3. Pay attention to her words
In order to understand women and what they want to tell you, logically, you need to pay attention to their words.
But, just looking at their lips talking doesn’t count as listening.
You need to observe quickly and process information even more quickly, so that you always have insight into what she is thinking.
You also need to pay attention to how she is talking to you. Is she talking in a low-pitched voice (kind of sad)?
If yes, then she expects you to act accordingly.
She’s trying to tell you that she doesn’t feel that good, and you might want to do something to make her smile.
Remember that she won’t tell you this directly. You need to figure it out on your own by observing her words and voice.
4. Pay attention to her actions
Is she sitting on the couch staring at the ceiling (pretending that she’s meditating)?
Is she trying to tease you about something funny you’ve done that day? Is she ignoring you all of a sudden?
Since women are pros when it comes to emotional connection and bonding, they have the ability to gesticulate their feelings and hidden wishes without even saying anything.
So, if you want to learn how to understand women, always pay attention to their actions because those will tell you more than their words.
5. Ask her questions
Another great thing that will help you comprehend a woman’s mind better is asking her questions.
So, instead of judging her instantly or starting to find solutions, simply ask her questions and pay attention to what she says and how she is saying it.
Also, when you’re not sure what to do, the worst thing you could do is assume that she wants to hear what you think you should say only to realize that you’ve screwed everything up.
If you’re having difficulties understanding her at the moment, just ask her how she feels and whether there is anything you could do for her.
It will save you a lot of time and nerves—I can guarantee you that.
6. Learn about her past
If a woman seems to behave in an emotionally-damaged way or constantly plays hard to get, know that there must be a reason behind it.
Every woman’s action is born out of reason, and that is why you should pay attention to her past as well.
Perhaps she was hurt in the past or taken for granted….
Learning about her past will prepare you for today and the future because knowing someone’s background, means knowing how they transformed into what they are today and how it may influence their further growth.
7. Be willing to open up to her
So, we learned that women are made of an emotional aspects and they strive to connect with others which leads us to the part of you being willing to open up to them.
In order to help a woman connect with you, you need to be willing to talk about your wishes, emotions, fears, and whatever suits you.
You need to be willing to talk about your feelings because if you’re not, a woman’s mind will decipher your action as being unwilling to share things with her and connect with her (which is quite insulting in our female world).
8. Don’t show off your masculinity
And the last tip for every man out there (I know it will not be your favorite one.
That’s why I put it at the end…just so you would keep reading). Remember to use your strength wisely! Now, what does this mean?
It means that you don’t have to constantly show off how strong and tough you are around women.
Instead, you need to do it wisely by choosing other, smarter ways. Instead of acting like Tarzan in the jungle upon hearing that someone made her unhappy, consider just hugging her tight which will show her that you’re there to protect her.
Showing only rage will frighten her.
Showing off your muscles will mean nothing to her if you’re not ready to understand her to the core and show it to her by your sweet, yet masculine gestures.
And that’s how you understand women!