8 cose a cui devi essere preparata quando esci con un uomo più anziano
L'amore è un vero miracolo. Non si può mai sapere chi si incontrerà domani o chi catturerà il nostro cuore e ci farà sorridere con una sensazione di farfalle nello stomaco.
Love can be uplifting, disappointing, unrequited or real. But, one thing is for sure. You can never choose the person with whom you’re going to fall in love with. It might be someone of your years, younger than you or rather, older than you.
And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with dating an older guy because every difference between the two of you has its charms. And it also has its ups and downs as well as any other relationship.
Se vi sentite a vostro agio ad uscire con un uomo più grande, seguite il vostro intuito e fate ciò che vi rende felici.
Ricordo una ragazza che era davvero in un ragazzo più grande and that was really surprising because all this time she had been saying that she’ll never be with someone who is much older than her.
Ma, in qualche modo, è magicamente accaduto che lei si è innamorato with that guy, and at first, she didn’t want to admit it to herself because it would mean that she’s contradicting everything she’s been claiming all this time.
So, she forced herself to ignore him from time to time, and she was constantly sending him mixed signals. And the guy, of course, couldn’t follow her anymore, and he decided to give up on her.
Sadly, till this day, this girl is still grieving for the lost chance and perhaps the love of her life just because she was too stubborn to reject the prejudice of being with an older guy. If you’re having similar doubts regarding an older guy you really like, learn from this girl’s mistake.
Don’t let yourself lose the opportunity to be happy just because you’ve imagined that you should be with someone who is younger.
Catherine Zeta-Jones and Demi Moore are perfect examples of this. They could have had partners ten times younger if they had wanted to, but they don’t give a fuck what others will think of them. And that is how you should behave, too. You should never force yourself to quit on something that makes you happy.
Quindi, quando decidete di uscire con un ragazzo più grande, dovete sapere che sarà un'esperienza unica di per sé, e dovete anche prestare attenzione alle seguenti 8 cose a cui dovete essere preparati.
8 cose a cui devi essere preparata quando esci con un ragazzo più grande di te
1. I suoi figli
La prima cosa a cui dovete prepararvi sono i suoi figli (se ne ha), ed è probabile che la maggior parte di loro abbia avuto figli prima del vostro arrivo. Per questo motivo, a volte le sue priorità potrebbero cambiare drasticamente.
He might shower you with love and affection, but he will always have in his mind that his children need the same amount of affection he’s giving to you. Sometimes his children will steal him from you when you need him most, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You can either be comfortable with it or you can be out of it, but there’s no gray area here.
Another issue that is also important is your potential children. Have you thought about having children with him? Do you think that he would want to have more children? Is he capable of becoming a father again? You need to understand that your vision of your potential motherhood will be greatly influenced by your older partner. And if you’re perfectly satisfied with his perspective on this, there’s no need to worry.
2. La sua prospettiva di vita
An older guy has obviously more life experience than you in most aspects. And that is why they already have a settled, firm life perspective which is almost impossible to be altered. What if you don’t accept that perspective?
If you’re considering dating an older guy, you should never enter into a relationship, thinking that you’re going per cambiarlo. That is not true. And if you want to change him immediately, it means you’re not that into him because if you were, you wouldn’t want to change him in the first place.
Cambiare significa sostituire la sua prospettiva di vita con la vostra, e questo è pericoloso. Potrebbe arrabbiarsi e rimanere deluso da voi anche se le vostre intenzioni sono assolutamente buone. Informatevi sempre il più possibile su un ragazzo più grande di voi prima di intraprendere qualsiasi tipo di relazione con lui, perché questo vi farà risparmiare nervi e tempo.
Once you know what you’re entering, it will be easier to adapt and maintain your relationship. You need to let his life perspective be your compass that will teach you a lot about life facts you haven’t learned yet.
3. Le sue preferenze
If you decide to date an older guy, you need to be aware of the fact that your preferences may collide with his. He might be into some old Netflix series, while you’re into some new and modern ones.
It is of utmost importance to be flexible in a situation like this because your older guy will not be that comfortable with giving up things he’s been practicing long before you entered his life.
When it comes to going to the movies, it will be almost impossible to pick something both of you like except when the two of you have similar tastes regarding movie genres. And sometimes you will have to accept that your guy has gone somewhere without you just because he knows you’re not into something he prefers.
In that situation, you need to stay calm and not take it to heart because he’s subtly trying to tell you that he understands and respects that the two of you have different tastes in different things. You need to be ready to compromise and respect his preferences just as he’ll respect yours.
4. La sua salute
We all know that the older you are, the higher the risks that you’re going to get health problems. Your guy might be in perfect condition at the time you met him, but this doesn’t mean that things will not eventually change.
As your guy gets older, he will need to take special care of himself in order to prevent potential health problems. But, there are some inevitable health issues that strike people at a certain age, and there’s nothing you can do about it except accept it.
His health will influence your well being as well, and you need to be ready for the sleepless nights that are awaiting you and to be there for him when he needs you. Sometimes his health will prevent you from enjoying things you thought he’ll be capable of enjoying.
But, if you’re really into him and you’re ready to face any kind of an obstacle regarding his potential health problems, you’ll be just fine. You just need to be prepared for what is about to come in order to stay collected and avoid panicking or even worse, regretting dating him in the first place.
5. Il suo desiderio sessuale
You need to be aware of the fact that your older guy might have a lower sex drive. Sometimes this can be a real issue if you’re a woman of action (if you know what I mean). But, there are also some benefits regarding his sexuality, and that is experience.
Mentre ragazzi più giovani have higher sex drives, your older guy will have more experience which automatically makes him great in bed. He will know how to satisfy your every need, and you will not have to tell him what he’s supposed to do in order for you to reach a climax.
As you can see, there are always some pros and cons, and if you can accept them, you’ll be more than happy in the upcoming days spent with him. Also, you need to understand that you can’t blame him if he simply doesn’t want to have sex as often as you prefer because it’s something he can’t really influence.
Tuttavia, anche il suo desiderio di sesso potrebbe cambiare nel corso del tempo, e l'unica cosa che dovete fare è rimanere pazienti e godere il più possibile nella morsa di un uomo anziano esperto che vi mostrerà l'essenza del sesso.
6. Le sue abitudini
Another thing that you should pay attention to is his habits. We all have our unique habits that we’ve acquired during the years, and once you acquire something for life, it is hard to get rid of it.
Il vostro uomo più anziano avrà probabilmente delle abitudini strane, come conservare certe cose in un certo modo o mangiare qualcosa in un certo modo e così via. Dovete capire che le sue abitudini fanno parte della sua routine e cambiarle sarà praticamente impossibile.
Un compromesso richiedono un grande sforzo, and if the two of you succeed in it, there will still be this feeling of dissatisfaction because all of a sudden, both of you need to change your routines and give up on something you’ve been doing this whole time.
La soluzione migliore è accettarlo per quello che è e aspettarsi lo stesso da lui, perché se continuate a insistere perché cambi, peggiorerete solo le cose e le sue abitudini rimarranno le stesse.
7. I suoi impegni finanziari
Anche i suoi impegni finanziari varieranno rispetto ai vostri, perché più si è anziani e più si è seri nei confronti dei propri guadagni. A volte le vostre aspettative si scontreranno con la sua diversa mentalità in materia di impegni finanziari.
Mentre voi vi aspettate che vada a fare un viaggio da qualche parte, lui potrebbe pensare di dare quei soldi ai suoi figli o a qualcos'altro che per lui ha una priorità maggiore. Non lo farà di proposito, ma la sua mentalità gli dirà che è semplicemente la cosa giusta da fare.
Ad esempio, non potete pretendere che spenda i suoi soldi per qualcosa di lussuoso quando il suo desiderio è quello di mettere i soldi in una pensione e salvaguardare il suo futuro. I suoi impegni finanziari variano di giorno in giorno e voi dovete essere pronti a scendere a compromessi.
8. La sua volontà di godere di cose nuove
Uscire con un uomo più grande significa spesso dire addio a quei viaggi spontanei che prima vi piacevano. Dovete sapere che il vostro uomo ha probabilmente sperimentato quasi tutto quello che c'è da sperimentare, e la sua voglia di godere di cose nuove diminuirà lentamente con il tempo.
You cannot expect that he will be all joyful about some new hobby or sport that you’ve just discovered. While it may seem interesting to you, his interest will most probably not follow yours.
The age difference is the main culprit of this, but it doesn’t have to be so if you’re more of a vintage type of a person. His job, his children and all of the other things that are parts of his life will take a lot of his time, and his will to enjoy new things and be casual will be changed significantly.
He will no longer find himself suitable to go partying all night because his attention will be directed to something else most of the time. But, if you’re okay with that type of lifestyle, I’m sure you’ll be having the time of your life with your older guy.
