9 consigli su come riconoscere un abuso narcisistico

By now, I think we all know what a narcissist is, right? It’s the type of person who only cares about themself (to say the least). They are so self-absorbed that they lack the basic human trait of empathy.

Without empathy you’re left with a shell of a human being, not being able to feel the pain of others, so they are very likely people who use the emotions of others to manipulate them.

That’s why we have the term ‘abuso narcisistico’, as it refers to the way narcissists manipulate someone’s emotions, to make them feel worthless and to make them think that no one other than the narcissist themself matters.

The worst part about being abused is the way we’re not even aware of it. That’s why I’ve summed up all the small and big signs you’re being abused by a narcissist.

Manipolazione

It’s the art of making someone do the things that benefit the manipulator. Sometimes it can even be seen as aggression.

If you’ve experienced manipulation while growing up you might not see it as such.

A volte la manipolazione può consistere anche in parole di gentilezza e complimenti usati per farvi fare le cose che vuole.

I think you’ve already pictured a typical situation in your mind: all those times he told you to give him a BJ just because you’re, “The best at it,” or something along those lines.

Abuso verbale

Verbal abuse is the one that leaves us with the biggest wounds, isn’t it? It includes yelling, assuming, bullying, demanding you to do something or ordering you around.

It can also be the use of sarcasm. And keep in mind that criticism isn’t the same as giving feedback!

He might even be calling you names and telling you that you’re not good enough.

Mentire

He’s constantly lying to you, telling you how he was out with his friends watching the game but you found pictures of him and some girl making out at a party.

Cosa vi dice? Bugie per fargli fare bella figura e per non farti arrabbiare.

Potrebbe anche mentire su piccole cose, come ad esempio su dove ha messo qualcosa solo per vedervi cercare tutto il giorno mentre lui sa dov'è in realtà.

These are just little examples of what your abuser might be doing. Keep in mind that their ultimate lie is, “I love you.”

Ricatto emotivo

This can include warnings that he will leave you if you don’t do what he wants and if you still refuse he might burst out in anger just to make you feel fear and obligation toward him.

You may even feel guilty for making him angry even though you could’ve saved yourself the trouble by doing it the first time he told you to.

Violenza fisica

From pulling your hair to blocking your path, it’s all violence, dear. If you disobey him, he might throw your things around and destroy the most precious items you have.

He doesn’t have to hit you for it to be called physical abuse.

Prosciugare le finanze

It’s also referred to as financial abuse. If you’re financially above your narcissistic abuser he won’t like it, so he’ll try to make it all even by gambling with the money he took from you or even selling your stuff.

Per quanto possa sembrare duro, questo succede. Potrebbe anche rubarvi del denaro se vi rifiutate di darglielo.

Isolamento

Vuole che restiate a casa ad ogni costo. Vi isola dagli amici e dalla famiglia, non permettendovi di uscire.

Può anche usare la forza per tenervi in casa.

Even verbal abuse to isolate you is common – for example, telling you that no one misses you and that you should stay home anyway.

Sabotaggio

He interferes with your relationships with friends and family, maybe even your work environment, to make you remember who has the ‘upper hand’ or for the purpose of revenge.

Isn’t this a huge bandiera rossa per farvi scappare?

Sfruttamento

Tutto ciò che fa è guardare a ciò che vuole, senza mai preoccuparsi delle vostre emozioni e di ciò che volete. Vi suona familiare?

He’s simply taking advantage of your kind heart and the fact that you love him to make you do everything he asks you to.

The sad thing about all of this is that you’ll know it’s happening when it’s too late. You can’t change him.

Narcissistic behavior happens in a continuum. He won’t ever feel responsible for your tears and may even laugh at your emotions.

Ci sono alcuni narcisisti al mondo che possono provare un po' di senso di colpa per le loro azioni, ma sono molto rari.

Quindi perché preoccuparsi di loro? Conoscere il proprio valore per sapere quando è il caso di andarsene.