Una lettera aperta alla ragazza che non riesce ancora a capire che non è stata colpa sua

Caro Lei,

Perhaps you don’t have a name in this text, but if you find yourself to be one of those girls who just can’t stop blaming herself per tutti i torti subiti nella sua vita, allora questa lettera è per voi.

And you need to read it. You need to read it because there are some things I need to tell you since you obviously aren’t willing to accept them on your own.

Quindi, ancora oggi vi svegliate di notte e vi chiedete: cos'è che fate di sbagliato? Cos'è che fa sì che gli altri vi feriscano o si allontanino da voi come se non significaste nulla per loro?

Why can’t you make them stay? You still wonder how come out of all people in your life, you’re only one that is never good enough?

I need you to stop doing this to yourself. I need you to stop being so mean to yourself and I need you to stop blaming yourself for everything you’ve been through.

Life is full of ups and downs and shit happens to everyone, but what determines you is how you deal with it. And frankly speaking, you should stop beating yourself up for the things you couldn’t and can’t change.

It’s not true that you could’ve done things differently. It’s not true that you could’ve been a better person or that you should’ve sacrificed yourself more.

Avete già dato il meglio di voi agli altri e loro lo hanno dato per scontato. Hanno usato la vostra gentilezza quando ne avevano bisogno e, una volta guariti, ti hanno lasciato.

But leaving is something that runs through their veins and nothing you did was going to make them stay. They didn’t enter your life to stay forever; they came because God sent them to teach you a lesson.

It’s time for you to understand what that lesson was.

Okay, friends that should’ve stuck around left. The boy who should’ve seen you and should’ve stayed, didn’t. Someone told you how you’re not good enough.

You can’t reach the expectations others have for you. So what? None of this means that something is wrong with you. It’s just that you had that bad luck to meet too many toxic people in your life.

But there isn’t anything wrong with you. And you need to stick this in your head once and forever.

Vi prego di smettere di pensare troppo, di riproporre scenari fallimentari, di alimentare il dubbio su voi stessi e di vedere il buono in tutti tranne che in voi stessi. Vi meritate di più.

Smettere di colpevolizzarsi e di rievocare vecchi ricordi dolorosi. Smettete di rimproverarvi per le cose che sono successe in passato.

Stop blaming yourself for the things you’re not guilty of.  And most importantly, stop tearing your self-esteem down.

Valete molto di più di quanto pensiate. And you’re better than you allow yourself to believe. And there is much more to life than you can wrap your mind around.

I’m sorry that you’re hurt. I’m sorry that they broke you. But they didn’t get the best of you. Keep that in mind. Nobody stole your sparkle.

Nobody took your future from you. And nobody swiped off the kindness of your personality. You’re still able to do bright things in the future.

You still have the time in this world to be the person you always wanted to be, but it’s time to start building yourself up now. It’s time to stop beating yourself up, too.

Perdonate le persone che vi hanno fatto del male. E poi allontanatele per sempre dalla vostra vita. Ringraziatele per le lezioni che vi hanno insegnato e ricordatele per sempre.

But don’t let them haunt you forever. May that be something that builds you up and makes you stronger—not something that destroys you.

Don’t allow it all to become something that keeps you awake at night or something that tears your good mood down each time you remember it.

È il momento di diventare padroni della vostra vita. È il momento di smettere di dare tanto potere su di sé alle persone sbagliate.

Now it’s time to show them, the world and yourself, what you’re made of.

Siate forti e perdonate voi stessi. Be strong and move on. It’s time for you to be happy again.

Ringrazia il tuo cuore per aver sopportato tanto dolore e aver continuato a battere. E prometti al tuo cuore di non fargli mai più passare lo stesso inferno.

Accept that you can’t control what happens in your life, but you can control how it affects you. Accept that you can’t control how people treat you, but you can determine their places in your life based on the way they treat you.

And always remember that you will never be good enough for wrong people, but you’ll be more than enough for the right ones.

L'ho imparato anche nel modo più difficile,

La ragazza che è già stata lì.