Pensate di sapere che lui è quello giusto?

Before making this beyond complicated, I will tell you the truth from the start. The truth is that you don’t know and you will never know. But you can feel.

Sapere e sentire sono due direzioni contraddittorie e quando si intrecciano possono creare un regno di confusione, incertezza e persino depressione.

Have you ever looked at your man and started thinking ‘how in the world can I be sure that he is the one?’ After that, you start weighing up some pros and cons, rewinding scenes of his socks under the bed or that last cake eaten by him…

Then you realize that there is no point in making a list of an ‘anti-perfect man’ and you start begging God and his assistants to enlighten you.

L'unico problema è che ci si concentra troppo sulla conoscenza e sui fatti del proprio uomo, invece di ascoltare l'intuito e le sensazioni di pancia. Sapere e sentire sono due direzioni contraddittorie e quando si intrecciano possono creare un regno di confusione, incertezza e persino depressione.

#1 SMETTILA DI CHIEDERTI SE È LUI QUELLO GIUSTO

Do you know the feeling when you question something to the extent that it becomes a haunting nightmare? If you want to forget that feeling (and I certainly would) then you have to stop asking yourself if he is the man who’s going to pick you up in his spaceship and introduce you to his crew (aka his parents) all the while exploring the endless extent of space that is love.

Kidding aside, you have to reach the level where you know that you don’t know that he is the one. Try repeating: “I don’t know if he is the one and I don’t give a damn. I will not let this overrated question manipulate me. I’m a strong, independent woman and I choose to live carefree.”

#2 SENTIRE

Being too occupied with questions and answers kills all the fun and spontaneity that are crucial to your well-being. For example, your head is in his lap and he’s playing with your locks while you’re questioning his existence along with the whole universe and the theory of gravity.

Lui lo saprà. Se ne accorgerà quando inizierete a porvi queste domande, perché gli uomini hanno quello strano radar che li avvisa ogni volta che c'è qualcosa di sospetto nella loro donna.

To avoid this, concentrate on feelings. If you feel like you’ve attained nirvana (and I don’t mean the band) when just hanging around with your man—THAT’S IT.

That’s the thing we’re looking for. Just listen to your intuition and embrace the feelings you get when thinking of that specific person and you’ll get the answer.

#3 COME POSSO ESSERE SICURO CHE I MIEI SENTIMENTI NON MI STIANO INGANNANDO?

YOU CAN’T and that’s the beauty of it. But if you’re sure of your own existence, that will do. Cogito, ergo sum (I think, therefore I am).

Pensare a qualcosa dimostra che esistiamo, ma non convalida i nostri sentimenti. Per esempio, Miranda dice di essere sicura che Jim sia quello giusto perché è una persona così buona.

Ma che diavolo? Che cosa significa?

Miranda probabilmente pensa che Jim è una brava persona per un milione di altre ragioni che corrispondono alla sua definizione di bravo ragazzo. Ma come la fa sentire questo? La vera domanda è come vi fa sentire lui.

Do you want to be with him because he is such a good guy and ‘the one’ according to your scale and priorities or do you want to be with him because he makes you feel transcendent, blessed and utterly grateful?

Non pensare. SENTIRE.

P.S. If he can drive you beyond crazy and you still don’t want him dead—he’s definitely the one.