LIFE

You Are Their Dream Girl, Until They See How Untameable You Are

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They look at you and all they see is someone gorgeous, wild and independent. Every man says that he wants that in a woman and every man gets scared the moment they realize that you are clearly not tameable. That they can’t own you. That they can’t hold you back from your wants, needs and dreams. That’s when they all leave.

You are so strong but it’s all because you have been hurt too many times. You are strong because you had to learn how to defend yourself from this cruel world that wants nothing but to break you apart and make you average. You are strong and that’s it. At first, a strong woman looks intriguing but if you’re not dealing with a real man, then being intrigued will soon turn into being intimidated.

You are wild and free. Your free spirit can be seen in the way you dance, the way you move, in the way you do everyday things. Your spirit is something that we all see and know too well, because you show it so freely. There is nothing as wonderful as the sight of you walking in the rain, because you don’t mind getting wet or the way you laugh so loud that everyone around you turns and smiles with you. Your free spirit seems to be your best asset but once they see that you won’t change for them, they leave.

You are their dream girl, until they see how untameable you are!

When they meet you, they swear it’s forever, they beg you to become theirs and they end up falling on their knees for your hand. It’s all beautiful until you start becoming ‘too much‘ for them. You become too independent, too talkative, too dreamy, too loud, too noisy, too needy. You simply become too much for their average self.

Once they see who you truly are, once they get to know your soul, they start intimidating you, telling you that it’s not the way a woman should behave. They tell you that a ‘real woman’ isn’t what you portray. They tell you that a woman should be more weak than strong, more delicate than rough and beautiful in boundaries that were put there by the men in their life.

The worst thing about all of this is that they will make you doubt yourself. You will question everything you’ve ever done and you will cry your eyes out, thinking that it’s you who has a problem. You will go over your past critically, thinking that you have been doing things wrong for too long. So you start to be a bit more shy and a bit quieter. You start to portray that female character he’s looking for in his life, because this way he doesn’t have to be scared that you might take the spotlight.

But the problem here is not you, my dear. The problem is that men have been taught that women should behave like little flowers that need protection. They have been taught that women have to be delicate, charming, weak and submissive. No one ever warned them about you and your wild heart, messy hair and a voice that doesn’t shut up in front of anyone! No one ever told them that a woman could be so beautiful while being so untameable!

That’s why you have to stop. You have to stop overthinking about your past and overthinking about the woman you have become. Don’t follow into the mold they have created. You don’t have to change who you are to impress a man who probably won’t even know how to treat you right.

Don’t turn yourself into a fragile flower when you are a force to be reckoned with! You can’t be put in a mold because it’s too small for your big heart. That’s why you should not try to change yourself. Don’t try to fit into society. Be loud. Be noisy. Be messy. Be who you want to be. This world needs more people like that to free us from all the stories and all the stereotypes that society puts upon us. Don’t forget that no one can be you better than yourself.

If a man is ready to accept that, then fine. But if he wants to change youwalk away. You deserve better.

Amy Nicholson
the authorAmy Nicholson

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