After you throw all the sadness out of yourself, you will realize that life prepares you for something much better and that this break was something that should happen to you. Maybe now it looks like your ex-relationship did not bring you anything but pain and disappointment, but it actually gave you a valuable life experience that will benefit you later. Sure, things may not have gone exactly as you’d planned, but at least now you have a better understanding of what you want — and categorically don’t want — in your next relationship. These are 6 life lessons you will realize after a heartbreak:

1. You’re stronger than you think.

While you were with him, you could not imagine life without him. Maybe he did convince you of that. But, maybe it was your imagination. And just because of these thoughts, the first few weeks after the break you did not want to get out of bed in the morning. There is only one thought in your mind: you will never be happy again. But little by little, day after day, your life will be restored. Every day you are getting stronger and when the period of mourning passes, you will realize that the most important relationship you should not neglect or interrupt is the relationship you build with yourself.

2. You can not change people.

This time you had to learn the lesson this way, but now you are ready for the next encounter with this type of person. A man who does not relate to you with respect and love, next time he won’t have a chance to get near you. Next time, you will know that you need a man who will support you and not spit at you.

3. Do not let them change you.

His comments on your looks, constant reproaches and trying to make a girl that he wants—not what you really are—have resulted in your insecurity, complexity and lack of confidence. Don’t change yourself to fit the needs of someone else. Now you know that your future partner should be just someone next to whom you will feel sexy, happy and full of confidence because it is the point of love. Someone who will motivate you to become even better and not different.

4. Life is unpredictable.

A heartbreak can categorically teach you that surprises are a part of life. Prior to a heartbreak, no matter how much you planned for your future love life, it was all shattered into pieces. You received what was unexpected from life. You were sure about your lover and his or her insights, but what happened later was a violent blow to your predictions.

5. Feelings are untrustworthy.

Feelings are like a vortex of emotions; they draw everything that surrounds them toward the center, sometimes engulfing your own life. So, to trust your feelings completely is not at all safe. And a heartbreak can very well teach you that. It can make you understand that your feelings are mere perceptions experienced by your body for particular situations. The feelings which once made you strong and steady can also make you weak and fragile and vice versa. So a crucial lesson a heartbreak can teach you is to judge people by their actions also and not entirely based on your feelings towards them.

6. Do not ignore your life because of anybody.

You didn’t pass three important exams, quite regularly in the gym, have neglected your friends … And all in your desire to spend more time with a boyfriend who, on the other hand, has not given up anything to adapt to you. After the break, you have hardly returned your life to normal and admit yourself that you will never again neglect your friends, family, obligations and yourself in the end. Now you have learned an important lesson that in the right relationship you should not neglect anything, but you should find a balance between your partner and other things which makes you as a person.