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Please Find Me After A Heartbreak

Please Find Me After A Heartbreak

Don’t find me in tears.

Don’t find me picking up the pieces.

Don’t find me staring at the sky looking for answers.

Don’t find me when I’m in pain.

Don’t find me because I won’t see you standing there. My eyes are going to be shut because of all the pain I’m feeling.

When I get my heart broken, I trust no one. Not even the ones I’m supposed to trust. You’ll be coming along at the wrong time. I trusted once and he betrayed me.

He left me with a bleeding heart and excruciating pain. Why would I risk that happening all over again? He said he would protect me, he swore he wouldn’t hurt me either, but he did it anyway. How do I know you wouldn’t do the same?

So, please, I’m begging you, find me after a heartbreak. Find me when I’m all better.

He forced me to stay alone. He crushed all the love I had. He stomped on my heart and left a huge footprint. He left dirt that takes a lot of time to clean. Don’t be the one to help me, because I know you’ll fail and I’ll lose you.

Leave me be. Leave me to heal on my own. Leave me to find a way to the light, to find a way to clean myself up and move on.

He made me feel nothing. After he was done, I felt like a nobody. I felt absolutely nothing. I couldn’t be angry or sad. I wish I could scream in anger, I wish I could let it all out, get the disappointment and the pain out of my system.

But he put on such a performance that it left me speechless. This break-up was his work of art and I was his display in a gallery. I didn’t have a mind of my own, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak. I was his work of art, completely controlled by him.

I wouldn’t be able to see you this way. I wasn’t able to see myself. So, please, leave me alone until I get back what’s mine, until I get back my old self.

After I pass this heartbreak, after I heal, find me then. Be brave enough to find me and love me.

Find me when I feel good about myself. Find me when I’m in the prime of my life. Find me when I’m happy and I don’t care about what anyone has to say.

When I get back my self-worth and my dignity, I’ll be ready to love again. So, find me after a heartbreak, not in the middle of it.

Find me when I’m a unique work of art. I want you to see my beautiful mess which was a result of a heartbreak. I want you to see how strong I am and how, despite the hell I went through, I managed to get back on my feet.

Please, find me when I’m strong enough to find myself again. I want you to meet me when I put my walls down and let you in my heart without any doubts. I want you to find me when I will trust you with my heart and my soul.

I want you to be by my side when I’m able to fix myself and every glitch that’s slowing me down. I want to be the best version of myself and I want to make you the best version of yourself.

I want us both to be ready to love each other for the rest of our lives. Because, truth be told, I’m done with heartbreaks. I’m done wasting time on people who hurt me.

So listen to me. Please find me after a heartbreak and not a moment before.