29 sinais reveladores de um jogador casado a que deve estar atento
No one wants to play with a married man. This is a pretty obvious red flag. But sometimes, the signs of a married player aren’t just a wedding ring and photos of their partner on social media.
Aqueles que querem sair com outras mulheres ou homens para além dos seus cônjuges podem ser profissionais em esconder o seu estado de relacionamento.
We want you to avoid getting emotionally tangled up with such people, so we’ve got 29 telltale signs you should be aware of before you start dating one.
29 Telltale Sinais de um jogador casado You Didn’t Know
It’s not uncommon to come across someone who’s married and wants to improve their love life with one or more partners.
They know that most of us won’t agree to these conditions, and that’s why they keep this information hidden. For this purpose, here are the 29 signs of a married player.
1. They don’t talk much about their vida pessoal
Let’s start with a clear sign of a married player: they keep their personal life to themselves.
Think about it: you have great communication, and you talk about a lot of different things – your interests, hobbies, and work mas nunca sobre os seus amigos, família e outras relações.
It’s normal that your partner may not be so open in the beginning, especially if they’re an introvert. However, these things should improve as you go further into your relationship.
But if even after months of dating, they continue keeping things to themselves, it’s an obvious sign they have someone besides you.
2. Desaparecem de vez em quando
Leading a double life is manageable, but we can’t ignore the fact that it’s easy to do so. There will always be some omissions.
As your married partner wants first to save their marriage and not the relationship with you, you’ll be the one to break apart.
You’ll see this in the way they, without any notice and for a long time, don’t call or message you. Why? Because they têm responsabilidades para com o seu cônjuge ou eventuais filhos.
Talvez tenham ido de fim de semana a uma viagem de família e se tenham esquecido de si. Só o encontrarão se tiverem tempo livre suficiente.
3. They don’t take you out to locais públicos
Os locais públicos são um pesadelo para qualquer homem ou mulher casada. Porquê? Porque esta é a forma mais fácil de alguém os expor.
Just imagine you go out to a fancy dinner, and they see a coworker or family friend sitting at the table next to you. They won’t just lose their relationship with you, but their marriage will be at risk as well.
However, this might only sometimes be the case. In larger cities, where there are more people and places to go out, it’s practically impossible to run into someone you know if you carefully choose the place you want to go.
4. They haven’t introduced you to their family and friends
If you have been dating for a long time, it’s natural to expect to even accidentally run into their friends or family members.
If they only talk a little about their personal life and don’t introduce you to family and friends, it’s a sign they don’t want a relationship with you or that they’re hiding something.
They are hiding their long-term relationship with someone else. That’s why they won’t introduce you to those close to them because there is a good chance they’ll spill that they’re married.
5. Nunca te convidam para ir a casa
Não só não querem ir a locais públicos consigo, como nunca o convidam para a sua casa, even though they’re at your place all the time.
This is maybe okay for the first few weeks, but have you been dating for months and never visited them or received an invitation? That’s a little shady.
Even if you sometimes go out, they’ll always be looking around to see if there’s someone who might recognize you. Their eye contact is never directly on you.
6. Nunca demonstram afeto em público
When a woman or man loves you, they’ll be all over you, and their body language will suggest how much they’ve fallen in love with you.
Se detetar estas coisas, mas apenas quando estão os dois sozinhos e nunca em público, it’s because they’re afraid someone might see you and expose them. You are lovers, but only in private – never in public.
Some people don’t like showing affection in public and love mantendo a sua vida amorosa privado, but if you spot other obvious signs of a married player, you’ll know this isn’t the case.
7. Têm um passado suspeito
Yes, people do change for the better. But most of the time, this is a hard and long process. If your partner has a reputation as a cheat, it’s probably because he is.
We shouldn’t rule out the fact that people can lie, but if you hear bad things about them from different sources, there is a high possibility they are true.
Things get worse if you hear that they’re married and have kids. Onde há fumo, há fogo.
8. They don’t like taking pictures
Toda a gente gosta de captar um momento agradável com uma fotografia. As fotografias servem para recordar o quanto gostaram dos momentos que passaram juntos.
So there isn’t anything bad about wanting a picture with your partner.
However, if your partner never takes a picture with you and always makes excuses about how they’re camera shy or aren’t photogenic, it’s one of the most common signs of a married player.
Porque qualquer fotografia vossa pode servir como prova da infidelidade deles.
9. Os seus fins-de-semana são planeados para outras coisas
When you’re dating a married player, one of the first things you’ll notice is that os seus fins-de-semana são fora dos limites. Um fim de semana é o tempo livre que utilizamos para desfrutar da nossa vida e passá-lo com os nossos entes queridos.
Se o seu parceiro nunca arranja tempo para si aos fins-de-semana e só bebe café consigo em alturas aleatórias durante a semana, há uma razão comum para isso.
Por muito que penses que isto é amor verdadeiroO cônjuge e os filhos serão sempre a sua primeira prioridade.
10. Gostam de namoriscar com outras pessoas
Flirting is a good skill to have. However, if your partner is too good at flirting with you, it’s normal to suspect they have experience in it.
Although good flirting skills don’t mean they are married player, it surely is one of the signs of a capítulo e um mulherengo.
Podem ser extremamente charmosos, mas isso requer muita habilidade e experiência. Então, como é que eles ganharam essa habilidade? Não por serem fiéis a uma só pessoa.
Quando se casam, assentam e deixam de ser o centro das atenções. Eles adoram a perseguição e tu és a presa perfeita.
11. Escondem sempre o telemóvel
It’s okay to keep your life private. No one has the right to dig around in your things. But what if they hide ordinary things from you? Things like a simple text message?
Admit that it’s a little suspicious. Maybe they are hiding a romantic text message from their spouse or a missed phone call from their children.
Put yourself in that situation. Would you guard your phone so much if it were a simple text message from your friend or coworker? I don’t think so.
Se não tivesses nada a esconder, nunca sentirias a necessidade de ocultar o telemóvel, and that’s a fact.
12. Viu-o com outra pessoa
If you’ve been dating for a while now, you might be familiar with their close friends, coworkers, and family members. But what if you randomly see them with someone else you don’t know?
Terá alguma suspeita, especialmente se detetar outros sinais de um jogador casado?
Bem, eles podem estar a levar uma vida dupla e a sua vida real é a vida com a família e os amigos. O que eles têm consigo é apenas uma fase ou uma coisa secundária.
Although this might sound harsh, it’s the truth you need to accept.
13. Fazem chamadas telefónicas secretas
You’ll want privacy when you have a business call or when you’re in a crowded room, but if they leave every time they need to make a phone call, it’s a sign they’re hiding something…or someone.
A more suspicious thing to do is if they check who’s calling and colocar a chamada em silêncio. Okay, maybe they don’t want to be disturbed, but if this happens constantly? I mean, it’s obvious, right?
They don’t want you to know who’s calling them, but they’re also aren’t able to answer the phone because they’ll be exposed.
14. Tomam duche antes de sair de casa
When you sleep together, it’s normal that you’ll want to take a shower after the action.
But think about it a little: if they shower every time and ONLY at your place, it’s probably because their spouse will suspect they have someone on the side if they come home and immediately take a shower.
Por isso, precisam de limpar todas as provas dos seus actos ilícitos antes de regressar a casa.
15. Fazem frequentemente viagens de negócios
Toda a gente tem a sua vida e as suas responsabilidades, tanto em relação ao trabalho como às outras pessoas.
No entanto, se planear algo e eles cancelar os seus planos à última da hora, dizendo que têm um viagem de negócios inesperada, it’s a little shady, isn’t it?
Maybe in their case, this ‘‘business trip’’ is a planear com a família that they have forgotten. It’s not a problem if this is a one-time thing, but if it happens often, you know the reason why.
16. Nunca passam a noite
Spending the night with you never happens. They always make an excuse not to spend the night with you, and they always promise that this won’t happen next time.
Essas desculpas baseiam-se frequentemente no facto de trabalhar de manhã cedo, but how is it possible that they can never make an exception? Maybe they’re late to see their spouse?
17. Tem um pressentimento
O bom e velho intuição, especially when it comes to women’s intuition.
Sometimes, they don’t need to display these common signs of a married player, but you still have this gut feeling that tells you something isn’t right.
Se se deparar com esta sensação, não há nada de errado em fazer uma pequena pesquisa sobre o seu parceiro. Onde é que eles vão? Com quem se encontram? Será que não têm mesmo perfis nas redes sociais?
18. São misteriosos
O facto de esconderem a sua vida privada é uma coisa, mas evitar perguntas directas é outra.
If they had nothing to hide, they’d answer you straight. However, a married person will always find a way to evitar qualquer pergunta que possa pôr em risco a sua vida dupla.
They will always answer with a silly phrase like: “If I told you, I’d have to kill you’’ or ‘‘That’s top-secret information’’ and accompany those sentences with a warm smile.
19. Apanhamo-los a mentir a toda a hora
Nobody lies as well as a married player. They may be good at hiding things in the beginning when you don’t know each other well, but after some time, you’ll slowly start to realize that this whole thing was a lie.
They’ll start to contradict themselves and get tangled up in their own lies. After some time passes, they won’t be able to distinguish what they’ve told you and what they haven’t.
20. They don’t use redes sociais
One of the main signs of a married player is if they don’t have any social media accounts. It’s the 21st century, and the internet has become an unavoidable thing.
It’s the first option when it comes to communication: do you know anyone who sends an SMS nowadays? No, me neither.
However, they don’t use social media because this will expose them as a married player, and that’s the last thing they want.
They can’t have social media accounts because this will show you they have a ‘‘happy marriage’’ with one or two children.
21. Cancelam frequentemente os seus planos
As viagens de negócios são, muitas vezes, uma desculpa válida para cancelar os planos, mas se só se encontrarem quando lhes dá jeito, estão a levar uma vida dupla.
Having a double life isn’t easy these days. On the one hand, they have a spouse and children they need to raise; on the other hand, there is you.
You will always be their second choice because it’s more important to them that they save their marriage than a ‘‘side chick’’ they can easily replace. That’s why they’ll always cancel plans with you and never with them.
22. Prometem-te coisas
As falsas promessas são uma tática comum que todos os jogadores casados utilizam. Estas promessas cegar-vos-á, and you won’t be able to see the whole picture and the signs of a married player.
Mas atenção: a maior parte das vezes, trata-se apenas de promessas não cumpridas que nunca irá acontecer. As promessas não cumpridas podem afetar seriamente não só a sua relação, mas também a sua saúde mental.
23. Mas nunca planear um futuro contigo
Even though they promise a lot of cute things, like the places you’ll go, the people you’ll meet, and the memories you’ll make, they never actually falar especificamente sobre o seu futuro.
They don’t have concrete moves and plans with you, and everything is just in the air.
After some time, you’ll probably end up dealing with a lack of self-esteem because you’ll think you aren’t good enough, while the truth is completely the opposite.
24. Só envia mensagens de texto se eles quiserem
Sim, encontrar-se pessoalmente é muito mais importante do que enviar mensagens de texto. No entanto, se o seu a comunicação em linha é mínima and you only talk when they want to, it’s a sign they might be married.
This stems from the fact that when they’re not with you, they’re probably with their spouse and children, so texting you can be a huge risk.
Even if they reply to you, they are short answers, mainly about where and when you’ll meet up.
25. They don’t put any effort into your relationship
Will a married player really put any effort into an affair? Yes, you’re right; they probably won’t.
They never make you feel special; you’re always at your place ordering takeout… They always promise you you’ll go on a trip together next weekend, but that never happens.
Passado algum tempo, apercebe-se que colocou um muito mais esforço na vossa relação do que eles alguma vez fizeram.
26. Têm sempre outras prioridades
It’s normal for adults to have a lot of other things to pay attention to besides a romantic relationship.
It’s normal not to be their number one priority, but if you see that they never have time for you and only meet up when they have unexpected free time, it’s obvious they’re only having an affair with you.
27. Querem manter a vossa relação privada
Ter uma relação privada é muitas vezes uma coisa boa.
Dar prioridade à intimidade da sua relação, à sua paz de espírito e à do seu cônjuge em detrimento dos olhares indiscretos e da validação de estranhos significa manter a sua relação fora das redes sociais.
No entanto, se insistir para que a vossa relação permaneça privada even after you develop into a serious relationship, it might be a sign that they’re married and don’t want to risk getting divorced.
28. Tratam-te como um peça lateral
If they treat you like a side chick, it’s probably because you are. This is not even the worst thing. If they treat you like this, they most probably ter outros parceiros também.
Não é uma prioridade para eles; só se encontram quando podem, quase nunca enviam mensagens e cancelam os planos à última da hora. É mesmo assim que queres ser tratada?
I know you desperately want to know more about their love interests and how you could fit in, but all these things are an obvious sign they not only have someone else but don’t respect you at all.
29. They say they’re separated
One of the signs they are a married player is if they speak ill about married life, saying that they’re separated or waiting for divorce papers.
Sim, as coisas podem ser confusas e complicadas, mas if they act like they’re married, it’s probably because they are.
Além disso, se a pessoa o amar realmente, cortará todos os laços com o cônjuge, a não ser que tenham filhos juntos e precisem de manter o contacto por causa deles.
What To Do If You Find Out They’re A Married Player
If you knew they were married, you shouldn’t have gotten involved with them in the first place.
However, if you didn’t know they were married, the best relationship advice I can give you is to forgive yourself and focus on other things,
Quando se apercebe que a sua relação não é o que pensava que era, só você tem o poder de determinar o que fazer a seguir. Mas quando se sabe algo, não se pode deixar de o saber.
1. Don’t lie to yourself
Don’t deceive yourself if you want to keep the relationship going. Don’t convince yourself that your partner is awful or that you were destined to be together.
Estás pronta para te comprometeres a ser a peça lateral dele e nada mais, com os olhos bem abertos?
Are you ready to live with the fact that you’re causing damage to other people just by being involved in this affair?
2. Perdoa-te a ti próprio
Pode não ter tido conhecimento do seu casamento. Pode ter aceite a versão deles de que estavam divorciados ou separados. Eles mentiram e a vossa relação pode ser fonte de muita culpa e humilhação para si.
Tenta perdoar-te a ti próprio. It’s not your fault you didn’t recognize the signs earlier.
It’s up to you what you decide to do next. However, ser gentil consigo próprio por não ter percebido a verdade. Talvez tenha notado alguns sinais de aviso e suspeitado de alguma coisa.
Ninguém quer pensar que um ente querido lhe está a mentir.
3. Ama-te a ti próprio
Love yourself enough to respect yourself. You’ll probably grieve and have an awful time after the breakup.
Mas isso é melhor do que estar com alguém para quem não é a primeira escolha. Don’t accept less than you deserve if you truly love yourself.
Não és responsável pelo que eles fazem. É responsável pela sua própria vida e pelas suas decisões.
4. Escolhe a tua jogada
E agora, o que vais fazer? Vais contar-lhe a verdade? Vais contar ao cônjuge dele? Quais são os seus planos e está preparado para lidar com as consequências?
Só tu tens autoridade para decidir isto. Talvez agora seja uma boa altura para pedir a ajuda de amigos e especialistas de confiança.
A terapia pode ajudá-lo a lidar com as várias emoções que possa estar a sentir.
In fact, if you’ve previously found yourself in a relationship of this nature, it may be time to consider the reasons behind your selection of unsuitable partners and how to deal with it.
Considerações finais
The signs of a married player can be more or less obvious. However, if you’ve read this article, you’ll be able to spot a married player.
But this isn’t where your journey ends. O verdadeiro problema vem depois de percebermos isto. Tens de aprender a lidar com uma situação como esta.
Your mental stability is the most important part here; try to focus on yourself and learn how to love yourself. It wasn’t your fault; bad people will come and go. The ones that matter will always stay.
