You won’t appreciate who she is at first because she doesn’t play games. She is transparent from the start. She gives you all the love she has right at the beginning; she’s open and vulnerable.
She has nothing to hide because she’s not pretending to be someone she’s not.
So, you think that’s something she’s obligated to do. You think she’s supposed to treat you like a king. So, you take her for granted, and you give her nothing in return.
She’s always going to be there for you, at any hour. Whenever you call her, she’ll have time for you.
This is why you’ll take her for granted. You’ll assume she has to find time for you, and you never even stop and think how she’s feeling because suddenly your problems seem more important than hers.
Everything you ever talk about is you.
Whenever there is something on your mind, you come running to her, and she gives you consolation. Your problems pile up, and you load them onto her without even thinking whether there is something that is bothering her.
She deals so well with her own stuff, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t need your help. The thing is, she has never found time to bother you because you are always a priority. There is always something going on with you.
In the beginning, you’ll know she tries so hard to make you happy. In the beginning, you’re going to cherish and respect that.
You’re going to try hard to please her because you know she deserves it. By treating her this way, you’re going to inspire her to treat you even better.
Perhaps you’ll even wonder what it was that you did to deserve such a beautiful person in your life. How can someone be so selfless for one reason only – love? What did you do right to deserve her by your side?
You’re going to be thankful and careful not to screw anything up, not to hurt her unintentionally.
Slowly, you’ll take her for granted. You’ll get used to her treating you right and giving you more than you deserve. Slowly, you’ll start to think her selflessness and love is something you’re entitled to without making any effort.
You’ll no longer have time for her as much as you used to. Now, she can wait. It’s not that important. You’re thinking that nothing will change if you do something first and then devote yourself to her.
Well, nothing will change right away, but making something else a priority creeps up on you, and before you know it, that girl who gives herself to you completely is no longer that important.
Putting her second will become normal because she won’t say a thing. She won’t object to your cruel behavior.
She won’t change her behavior. She won’t get even with you and treat you like you treat her. She’ll be even better and kinder, hoping you’ll realize you’re neglecting her, hoping you’ll change.
This is what makes you just like everyone else. At first, you swear to keep her safe, to respect and honor her. But in the end, you end up neglecting her and taking her for granted. In the end, you become a heartless jerk, just like the rest of them.
You’re messing with her. From the way you treat her, you’ve learned this one thing and that is — you can get away with pretty much everything. She is not responding to your poor treatment. Moreover, the more you treat her badly, the more she treats you better.
So, unconsciously, you start testing her limits. You become a narcissistic egocentric. You start doing whatever you feel like without thinking twice about her and whether your actions are going to hurt her feelings. You’re testing her limits, and you’re trying to find that line you’re not supposed to cross.
Suddenly, she’s had enough. Suddenly, you’ve hit the wall and come to that line.
Sadly, that is a road in one direction. There is no way back. You can try to find the way back to her heart, but you’ll get lost.
Suddenly, that girl is no longer trying that hard. Everything she did has vanished. She has turned into you. She doesn’t give a damn. She doesn’t answer your calls right away. She doesn’t plan everything. She doesn’t care that much.
She is now someone you once knew, but yet again, she is a complete stranger. Do you remember how she would tell you all about her day and what she did, what happened to her? She was always keeping you updated because she cared enough to include you in her life.
Now, she stays quiet. There are no more funny stories about her day. Now, you no longer know what happened to her. She doesn’t want to share herself with you anymore.
Then your hell begins.
You go back, and you realize that girl is worth a thousand apologies. That girl has deserved to never ever move a finger to please you.
You realize how many times she could have been mad at you, but she let it go because she is like: “Everyone makes mistakes…so what?”
Now you realize how much shit she had to put up with because you’re no angel. You’re not someone who has deserved her. You are a person with flaws like everyone else. You made thousands of mistakes, and she never pointed out any of them.
She got over them, and she moved on loving you the same as before—loving you, even though you’ve hurt her.
You realize that you miss her.
But you realize you blew it, too.
She will get over you. She will love again. If that bit of conscience left in you is wondering whether you scarred her for life, I’ll tell you, you didn’t.
She’ll hurt, and it’s going to be painful. But, she’ll heal.
And someday, she will meet someone new. She will love him and treat him just like she treated you, but this time, that man will be aware of what he has while he has it.
That man won’t take her for granted and realize he misses her only after she’s gone.
You’ll even see them together. You’ll see her laugh. You’ll see her happy, and it will eat you alive. Your jealousy will become unbearable, but you had it coming.
You could have been that man she’s holding right now. You could have had everything with her by your side.
Now, you don’t have the right to miss her. You don’t have the right to want her back. You only have the right to let her go.