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You Say You Love Me But You Treat Me Like Sh*t

You Say You Love Me But You Treat Me Like Sh*t

Hey ‘Love of my life’,

I know that we have been going through so many things lately and I also know that you are guilty of most of them. So, I just wanted to ask if you ever think about how I feel.

Do you think it is normal for me to stare into space all day while tears are running down my face?

Do you treat anyone else you love like you treat me?

Do you know what you are doing to me? Do you know that I keep looking at myself at the mirror and wondering if I am beautiful enough for you?

Do you know that sometimes I cry in bed and choke on my tears because you were giving attention to another girl while I was sitting next to you? Do you know what it feels like when the one you love the most treats you in a way you don’t deserve?

Can’t you see that I am doing everything in my power to make you happy while I am forgetting about my own happiness?

worried couple looking at each other at cafe

I just don’t know what I should do to make you satisfied once and for all? Should I do a fucking triple backflip while I am singing your name or what? What do you want from me?!

Leave me or be with me, but stop treating me like shit. That’s not something I deserve. I deserve much more than that. I deserve more love, more affection, more support, and more kindness.

Can’t you see that I am all you need to be happy?

Nobody will crave you like this!

Nobody will fuck you like this!

Nobody will die for you like this!

But you are too blind to see that. And even if I want to change you so much, I can’t. I am just deceiving myself that one day you will change. I believe that our love is strong enough to go over all the bumps on the road.

worried couple sitting at cafe

But every time you call me “bitch”, I wake up from that dream and come back to reality. And I hate myself for allowing you to do all this to me.

Deep down, I know that I could be happier with another man. The one who will take care of me like I was the apple of his eye.

The one who is deeply and madly in love with me, without limitations. The one who stops breathing every time he sees me.

I think it is time for you to think about all this, because I started thinking about leaving you lately. So listen to me now: this is your wake-up call. You need to get your shit together if you want to stay with me.

I am too good to settle for less than I deserve. You just chose a wicked way to deceive a girl who loves you. But bear in mind that I won’t be here for too long.

Young couple are fighting in the cafeteria

I started to realize that you are someone who will never change. And you will feel sorry when you see that there is a man above you in my life. You will be crushed because you let go the one who would do anything for you.

And the worst thing of all is that I won’t be there to wipe your tears. I will be giving that honor to all those who you choose over me.

I am so over that game that we have been playing for a long time. Little by little I found that strength that was forgotten somewhere deep down inside.

I learned to stand up and fight for myself. And today, I finally found what I’ve been looking for.

I finally found ME.

You Say You Love Me But You Treat Me Like Sh*t

Just an average woman

Thursday 12th of January 2023

I don't know if you actually wrote this, did you? 🤔 you're telling me to get my shit together if I want you well I do want you

Just an average woman

Thursday 12th of January 2023

What do you think about late at night? Do you wonder about us, do you miss my voice, or my laughter? Do you miss the fact you can read me like no other? Do you miss the I love you, no I love you more? Do you miss me sending you memes about love and how I see you and I. You don't need to do backflips, you are more than good enough the way you are. I appreciated every single time, you supported me and made time even while at work. They were more important to me than the thank you I said to you. Every msg was like a tasting a lollie for the first time, so sweet and exciting. I love you more than any man I've ever known. All the memories of phone calls and statements said still affect me the same way they always have. I wonder how you are everyday. Each day there are several things that happen that I think to myself that would of been good to share with you. I never wanted a baby daddy replacement just someone to be kind to them. You pulled away and stopped communicating, if only you had have talked to me I would have done anything and compromised to keep our love. I still give you glowing reports and I looked up to the clam person you are and the effect it had on me. I want normal and I want you. I had everything in place to learn to be a better person, and move forward with you without the issues hanging over our relationship. I'm not perfect and I will by no means ever will be, you made me feel protected and all I ever wanted to be for you was the same as you were for me a lover I could lean on and vent to, however you want to be strong all the time. I do wonder all the time how you were feeling and I asked you what was wrong. I kept getting the same answer. You influenced the start of me wanting to change, by apologising when I was I was in the wrong, never a fake apology because I didn't want to treat you badly. I've never had what you had offered, and I never will as it's unique to you. I was just getting used to being with you, was actually interested in how I was when this went awall. My smile was generous and genuine and I believed you wanted this more than anything. When I asked you if you wanted to end this relationship and you said no you then disappeared with no other words. I took your silence as a lack of interest in us as I didn't get any further communication. I sent you large msgs because you wanted and needed me to be able to communicate so I just wrote it all out like word vomit thinking it was better to let you know. Have you cried too? Have you sat and thought about everything you and I wanted as a couple and gone fuck I still want that just as much as we both did? Have you wanted to just pick up the phone and talk to me, as I have? I didn't want you to change at all anything about your life I only wanted to walk through life beside someone who I love and admire. The way you answer the phone, Hey baby girl. The smooth and calming tome of your voice, your laugh at my saying the dumbest shit. The afternoon msg, I'm on way home babe. I did also tell you to arrive alive because I didn't want anything happening to you. That beautiful good night msg and my treasured good morning beautiful msg. Ok you work hard and long hours it didn't bother me, you love what you do and I think you truly amazing to have the dedication to be successful in a hard stressful job. Yes those 3 days not talking to you and hearing your voice were hard, I always looked forward to that first phone call and hearing you call me baby girl. Don't for on minute think I'm happy without your presence as I'm not, are you? I miss everything about you and I dearly miss the way you made me feel. I do love you, there will never be another you and yes love can conquer all, I just don't know if you are that hurt that you would still cut your right arm off for me in your life. The loans weren't for me I actually helped the old girl get a phone when she didn't have one so she could still apply for jobs. I never asked you for any money and never would. I'd rather have your love and live in a dump truck than take what you worked hard for. The kids scream because they all are screamers. The boy does it because he's regression to compete with his sister after being reunified. You know I always looked after the kids before getting on the phone with you, bar a few occasions. I've made my mistakes with you and I'm not that pig headed that I can't admit that. I will always make mistakes I'm human and still learning about life and myself. Sometimes I dont explain things the right way or the totally wrong way as a matter of fact, I did want to lean to communicate with you the right way. I only ever wanted your love, time and affection. I've lost the best man walking the face of this God forsaken earth, not because you are the most handsome man I've ever seen, because of who you are as a man. A gentle nature, with the right mix of manliness, a well spoken polite yet cheeky humoured man, a protector a man I didn't need to fear. I truly love you more than you know. I definitely know that if I didn't love you it wouldn't be absolutely tearing me apart. Are you ok?