“To be, or not to be; that is the question.” To work things out, or not to, that is an even better question.
When you’re having a rough patch or going through some bad times one way or another, the first thing that naturally comes to your mind is GETTING OUT and saving yourself.
This is a shortcut that many of us have chosen to follow due to a lack of reasons to work things out instead.
But don’t get me wrong; in some situations, getting out (breaking up) is the only right thing to do, such as when we’re in an abusive relationship.
The best relationships are not the ones that are perfect by default but the ones where partners make a continuous effort in spite of every hardship and obstacle.
If you both know that you’ve done everything in your power and still nothing has changed, then you know the best option is to go your separate ways.
However, if the following signs ring true in your relationship, then you should consider working things out with your partner instead of breaking up because things will DEFINITELY get better:
The relationship still makes you (want to be) a better person
Before doing anything, stop for a moment and think about whether you liked yourself more before this relationship or you like yourself better now.
If the answer is the latter, then this is a good sign.
Usually, when a relationship is toxic and bad for you, there’s not a chance of you flourishing and becoming a better person.
The same thing happened to me recently.
I was in a relationship for some time and before I was about to break up with them, I realized that I was no longer the same person I used to be before.
Instead of becoming a better person, I had totally changed into someone I no longer recognized.
After some time of being single again, I recharged and felt ten times better than before.
People around me confirmed that I was glowing once again and that’s exactly how I felt inside out.
External conflicts are making you unhappy (not internal personality conflicts)
In the majority of cases, relationships are challenged by external conflicts like money or lovemaking problems and other circumstances.
Perhaps you’re living under the same roof with your parents and you have no privacy or you are currently unemployed.
Because of all this stress, you might avoid making love to your partner, cuddling and other romantic activities.
That is when things start to go south in a relationship and one partner (or both) starts to feel neglected.
Still, it’s important to understand that these problems can be SOLVED and you shouldn’t break up with your partner.
Instead, you should both understand that the problem is not your relationship and instead something you can’t really influence but you can work on making things better.
You still support and respect each other
No, I don’t mean supporting each other on social media but in real-life situations (especially during tough times).
If you’re still supportive and respectful of each other, it means you are probably still in love.
The thing is, when couples fall out of love, they no longer respect each other and the relationship starts falling apart. Lack of respect is one of the biggest signs your partner doesn’t love you anymore.
If there is no support or respect in a relationship, that is a huge red flag because such situations are often irreparable.
However, a lack of passion or struggling to say I love you at the moment are things that can be worked out with mutual effort.
Your friends and family are still supportive of the relationship
When it comes to relationships, our friends and family are usually better judges than ourselves.
They always notice whether we are happier in a relationship or if it has become a burden to us.
So, if your best friends or family members are telling you that you shouldn’t break up with your partner, it is because they know that you are still a good match and you can work things out.
From their point of view, you are still in love with each other, but you just have to work on improving things (whatever the problem is) and if you stay patient and consistent, you will definitely succeed in it.
You still want to be with your partner for better or worse
If you said, “I do,” then you know the true difficulty and the meaning of the statement ‘for better or worse’.
Regardless of whether you’re married or in a relationship, I want you to ask yourself the following: “Do I still feel good with my partner when I’m both at my worst and at my best?”
Do you still want to be with them both when things go south and when it is smooth sailing?
If the answer is yes, then you should work things out instead of breaking up with them.
Why? Because it means you still have a healthy basis in your relationship. You can still rely on each other regardless of the situation.
It’s easy to be with someone when everything works perfectly but wanting to be with someone even when everything is falling apart is a sign of true love and devotion.
The happy moments overshadow the bad moments
One sure-fire way to figure out if you’re in an abusive and toxic relationship that has no future is by comparing the happy moments with the bad moments in your relationship.
Do you notice that the happy moments are the ones prevailing in your mind? If yes, then you know there’s nothing you should worry about.
Just live life to the fullest, have no regrets, relax and enjoy every second spent with your partner.
Work on improving those little things that are causing you trouble at the moment and you’ll be just fine.
You have a gut feeling that you should stay together
Last but not least, if you have a gut feeling (that little voice in your head) telling you that you should work things out and stay together, then you should trust yourself.
Your gut feeling is your soul telling you what you should do, so you should never question it.
Instead, you should stay positive and repeat to yourself: We can work it out!
If you believe that you can, then you’re already halfway there.
To help you with the motivation compartment, here is a list of inspirational quotes about working things out.
39 Inspiring Work Things Out Quotes To Help You Overcome Relationship Problems
1. “Whatever problems arise in a romantic relationship, it’s important to face them together as a couple. If an aspect of the relationship stops working, don’t simply ignore it, but instead address it with your partner. Things change, so respond to them together as they do.” – Anne Nwakama
2. “Behind every happy couple lies two people who have fought hard to overcome all obstacles and interferences to be that way. Why? Because it’s what they wanted.” – Kim George
3. “Relationships last long not because they’re destined to last long. Relationships last long because two brave people made a choice. To keep it, fight for it and to work for it.” – Unknown
4. “You can’t just give up on someone just because the situation is not ideal. Great relationships aren’t great because they have no problems. They’re great because both people care about the other person to find a way to make it work.” – Unknown
5. “We are told that people stay in love because of chemistry, or because they remain intrigued with each other, because of many kindnesses, because of luck. But part of it has got to be forgiveness and gratefulness.” – Ellen Goodman
6. “Forget all the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason why it will.” – Unknown
7. “Every relationship needs an argument every now and then. Just to prove that it is strong enough to survive. Long-term relationships, the ones that matter, are all about weathering the peaks and the valleys.” – Melchor Lim
8. “A beautiful relationship does not depend on how well we understand someone but it depends on how well we avoid misunderstanding.” – Unknown
9. “Every relationship has its problems but what makes it perfect is when you still want to be there when everything goes wrong.” – Ritu Ghatourey
10. “The couples that are meant to be are the ones who go through everything that is meant to tear them apart and come out even stronger.” – Unknown
11. “When you find someone you can truly love, you will fight to keep that relationship. No matter what obstacles you both will face, you will never give up on each other. You may get lost along the way, but one of you always keeps catching the other. Soon one day both of you will have each other’s backs.” – Jenna Bognar
12. “You can’t have a relationship without any fights but you can make your relationship worth the fight.” – Unknown
13. “Love isn’t when there are no fights in the relationship. Love is when once the fight ends, love is still there.” – Unknown
14. “Relationships include: fights, jealousy, arguments, and tears. But a real relationship fights through all of those with love.” – Unknown
15. “A relationship is like a house. When a light bulb burns out you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb.” – Unknown
16. “All relationships have one law. Never make the one you love feel alone, especially when you’re there.” – Unknown
17. “A true relationship is two imperfect people refusing to let go of each other.” – Unknown
18. “Love is the remedy of all problems, misunderstandings become jokes, insults become humor, a perfect relationship.” – Dielnov Muchati
19. “Great couples still get angry with each other, but they continue to discuss until there is a solution even if it takes several days.” – Bob Grant
20. “The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it.” – Nicholas Sparks
21. “Trouble is part of your life, and if you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you enough chance to love you enough.” – Dinah Shore
22. “I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies.” – Woody Allen
23. “There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” – Bryant H. McGill
24. “Problems should be like speed bumps. You slow down just to get over it, but you don’t let it stop you from heading to your destination.” – Sonya Parker
25. “All relationships go through bad times, but real relationships get through bad times.” – Anurag Prakash Ray
26. “Hold no grudges and practice forgiveness. This is the key to having peace in all your relationships.” – Wayne Dyer
27. “Problems in relationships occur because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person.” – Wayne Dyer
28. “We don’t develop courage by being happy every day. We develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.” – Barbara de Angelis
29. “Both people need to care deeply about the other person, to put the other’s needs before their own, and to make a daily commitment to that person to stick it out.” – Alessandra Torre
30. “In any serious relationship, if you don’t gather your partner’s opinion before making a decision that impacts you both, you’re just storing up trouble for the future.” – Cindy Woodsmall
31. “The truth is, everybody is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.” – Bob Marley
32. “Good communication is less about saying what you mean, and more about defining what you say.” – Kelli Jae Baeli
33. “Explain your anger, don’t express it and you will immediately open the door to solutions instead of arguments.” – Unknown
34. “Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.” – Swedish proverb
35. “Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take.” – Anthony Robbins
36. “Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.” – Socrates
37. “To solve the problem you have to recognize your share of responsibility. If you only blame the other person, you will never solve it.” – Unknown
38. “Nobody likes conflict, but sweeping issues under the rug ultimately causes more damage than addressing things directly.” – Unknown
39. “The extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues is a critical marker of the soundness of a relationship.” – Henry Cloud
I hope these relationship quotes have inspired you to work things out with your partner.
Remember that you can achieve anything together and overcome any obstacle only if you want to and if you’re still in love with each other.
Love is the most powerful force in the world and it can do anything. I wish you the best of luck and lots of love!