It has always been like this: a woman would settle for a man who gives her less than what she deserves because she loves that man or out of fear.
Even today, we’re taught that it can’t always be rainbows and butterflies and everything nice, we’re taught that it’s OK to lower our expectations and settle for a man who isn’t putting enough effort into the relationship.
Well, let me be the one who will tell you that it’s not OK. It’s not fair toward yourself and all the effort you’re willing to put into his happiness. That’s why I’m giving you a few reminders on what to never settle for in a relationship, because you need to know your worth.
1. Conditional love
If you need to change yourself or do a certain thing that isn’t moral to you and never will be in order for your partner to love you, then that isn’t love.
Loving someone conditionally means that the person will most probably always find a thing or two about you to change and why would you want that? Find someone who will love you just the way you are.
2. Someone unambitious
If he’s not ambitious about his life, his goals, and dreams, or about your relationship, then I really don’t know what you’re doing with him. You should want someone who will conquer the entire world together with you and never be afraid to pursue his dreams to the fullest.
Be aware that if your partner is ambitious, you will most probably want to run after everything you want in your life because he will inspire you. That’s what you need.
We’ve all heard that respect is one of the main things in a healthy relationship, so why would you even try to make a relationship work if your partner doesn’t respect your values and your dreams?
If he doesn’t respect you for who you are and if he’s constantly telling you that what you believe in isn’t valid or isn’t worth fighting for, you don’t need him in your life. You deserve better.
You are a high-value woman who doesn’t even think about going out and flirting with other men or, God forbid, cheating on your boyfriend. So why settle for someone who is going to make your life harder with his accusations and lack of trust?
Jealousy is never OK; there’s trust or no relationship at all!
5. An open relationship
You see, the thing is, if we want to make monogamy a thing again, we need to take action.
Unless, of course, both you and your partner want the same thing and then it’s completely fine. But if you’re just scared of losing him and you convince yourself that you will be able to live with the fact that your partner is sleeping around with other women, then don’t do it.
Simply, don’t do it. Don’t settle for an open relationship if you’re not comfortable with it. Even if he threatens to leave you, let him go. He’s definitely not worthy of you.
6. Doesn’t like your friends
”Maybe if he gets to know them a little better, he might start liking them.” This isn’t really something you should settle for. Find someone who respects your friends and someone who finds them awesome just because you find them awesome as well.
If your friends are nice, kind and generous people, why would you go for a man who thinks that they are weird and tells you how much he despises them?
7. Someone who wants to ‘’fix you’
You don’t need fixing my dear, you need someone who going to hold the pieces while you do the fixing yourself. I know that with all those broken parts of you there is a lot to comprehend and a lot to work on, but that doesn’t make you unworthy of unconditional love and respect.
Don’t settle for someone who wants to fix you, because you can do the fixing yourself. You should be with someone who will love you as broken as you are.
8. Being taken for granted
You’ve been working so hard on making the relationship work and making your partner feel loved by your side, you have given so much of yourself to the person who means the world to you and what does he do? Nothing.
He keeps on taking everything from you and never putting any kind of effort into the relationship. He might be thinking that you’re always going to be there for him, because he knows that you love him and care for him.
Make sure he knows that it won’t be the case if he doesn’t step up his game and start treating you the way you deserve.
9. Something temporary
You simply can’t seem to picture you two together in the future, but for some reason, you keep believing that it’s going to change. You think that you will find some things in common and that it’ll be all right.
But why would you want to wait for the moment where you’ll be able to picture you two together, holding hands while watching your children grow up? If you can’t see him as the father of your children or the love of your life, then move on.
If he stresses you out more than he makes you happy, then why do you invest your time and energy into the relationship? It simply isn’t meant to be. I know that relationships do need a lot of work, but at the same time, they need to be fun.
Your partner needs to make you happy and be there for you, not stress you out all the time because he doesn’t know how to appreciate you.