Do I like him? That’s the million dollar question ninety percent of women ask themselves after a date that they’re not sure went exactly according to plan or when they think about that weird borderline friends relationship they have going on.
Feelings can be SO misleading sometimes. Feelings can really suck. But, what can you do about it?
You are human, you feel. You deal with it and find a way to understand what’s going on in your love life.
So here’s the problem and I’m bringing you the best answer possible.
You can think you don’t have a crush on the guy you’re seeing, but then when he’s gone, you realize you’ve been denying your true feelings for him from the beginning.
We all go out with people, desperately trying to find our “one” and sometimes, due to our hidden desire to find that deep love that movies romanticize so much, we tend to settle for something that’s not easy to define.
But the real truth is, it’s just too risky to put your heart out there, leaving it so open and vulnerable, when you’re just not sure whether you like him or it’s just a fleeting crush for the sake of momentary pleasure.
You really want to like him and you want to be sure of your feelings if you’re going to act on them… But what if your mind is tricking you? What if your real feelings are not what you’re feeling right now?
What if this guy is just some rebound dude you like at this very moment, because you’re still so fresh from a breakup that you just can’t think straight?
This is why it’s really important to ask yourself, “Do I like him?’’ for two very specific reasons
Firstly, you don’t want to end up embarking on another superficial, draining, insignificant romantic voyage that’s going to feel good for exactly three weeks before you start realizing you’re wasting your time on something so meaningless.
And secondly, you want to be careful not to hurt his feelings either. Men are people too. However tough their exterior might appear, they hurt just as much as we do, so it is necessary to be certain of what you want before making any promises.
If you want to be in a real, healthy relationship with this man, you need to be careful to start it off with honest, genuine feelings.
As you know, loyalty takes first place in every relationship and you can’t be loyal if you’re unsure of your feelings.
So, if you’re still interested in uncovering the hidden affections of your heart, keep reading, give honest answers to these questions, and find out for sure. Good luck!
Do I like him? 20 questions you can ask yourself to know for sure
1. How often do you think of him?
If the answer is occasionally or sometimes, it might be a temporary crush.
But if you can’t take your mind off of him and if thoughts about him give you a fuzzy feeling, the answer is clear – you like him.
Although this is usually true, there is an exception to similar situations.
You have to count on the first phase after you meet someone new. He may be on your mind quite a lot, but that usually lasts maybe 10 or 15 days.
I suggest you don’t make the first move until you’re absolutely positive you like him.
If nothing’s happened in that period and you stop thinking about him, it means that you were just infatuated by him and not in love. These periods last so much shorter than the real deal.
2. How many things that you like about him can you list?
What do you like about him? List everything on a piece of paper and see the number of listed things.
Are there more than 10, maybe 20 or 30 things you really do like about him?
If so, why are you even asking yourself if you like him? Of course, you do.
3. How would your life look without him?
Has your life gotten much happier since he’s been around? Are you happy he’s there?
Or would it be much better if he wasn’t around? Is this the first time you feel complete?
Is this the first time you really have the feeling that you are in a real relationship?
If your answers to these questions are yes, then you have nothing to worry about. Go for it!
4. Does being around him feel natural?
We simply have some people in our life who are just meant to be there.
They feel like sunshine after a storm, so beautifully warm, and we feel so connected to them because we can be ourselves around them. Does this apply to him, too?
5. How does your body behave when you see him?
Does your heart rate increase? If you feel your heart thumping inside your chest and you lose your breath, if you can’t find the right words and you always say something silly or things don’t come out of your mouth the way they should, you are getting nervous around him.
The next question is, ”Why do you get nervous?” and I guess that’s because you really do like him.
6. How does he look at you?
Okay, the way a man we like looks at us can give us shivers all over our body. Does he look at you that way?
Does he knock you off your feet just by looking at you? Is the physical attraction too hot to handle?
These questions are the basis of every relationship. If your answers are in the affirmative, you have nothing to worry about.
You’re definitely crazy about that guy and if you play your cards right, you can go far in your intention.
7. What are your relationship goals?
I mean for the both of you. Can you see yourself being with him and reaching all the relationship goals you’ve set for yourself?
Can you imagine yourself being happy with him? If you immediately thought, “Yes!” to all of the above, you probably really like him!
8. If he asked you on a proper date, what would you do?
Have you imagined the situation where he comes to you and asks you out? Do you recreate that same image in your mind every time you see him?
If the answer to this one is a picture of yourself jumping around out of happiness, then my job here is done.
9. Do you have a connection?
Meaning an emotional, mental, and maybe even a physical connection with him.
Emotional, as in you feel secure when you’re around him and you don’t need to worry about if he’s going to be there for you.
A mental connection, as in you can talk about everything that’s on your mind with him.
Physical – do you find him attractive? Is he sexy; is he good looking? Be honest!
10. Simply ask yourself if you like him.
It’s about the first thing that pops into your mind. If you get that fuzzy feeling and butterflies in your stomach and if the first thing on your mind is happiness, then the answer is clear. No need to further question yourself about it.
Consider yourself lucky if he feels the same about you because a lot of people find themselves in the state of hopeless infatuation but sadly don’t get any response in return.
11. Have you gotten to know him?
Have you sat down with him and talked about his plans for the future, his morals, ideals, likes and dislikes?
If you haven’t had a proper conversation about the big stuff, it’s important to do so before deciding if you really like him!
12. How long has it been going on?
I mean, how long do you think you have liked him? If you’ve been crushing on him for some time now, you might see that there is no reason to just call it a crush.
Crushes can’t last for a long period of time—they are just temporary. But if it’s been months? It’s more than just a crush.
13. Are your friends teasing and pressuring you into being with him?
Friends from both sides. If you’re being pressured from your and his friends to like him and be with him because, as they said, ”You’d look cute together,” chances are slim that you’re actually interested in him but rather that you’re being pressured into something that wasn’t even your choice to begin with.
14. Why are you confused about it?
Usually, if you like someone, you simply know it. You feel it, to be honest. You don’t question yourself.
But if you do, you can continue to ask yourself questions like, “Is it because I didn’t have the chance to talk to him alone?”
15. Does he compliment you a lot?
You like the people who see the good parts of you and compliment you a lot. It’s human nature. We love to be complimented.
If he does compliment you a lot, then maybe you’ve fallen for the compliments and not for him? I don’t know, you do.
16. Are you trying to get over an ex?
This can mess with your feelings a lot. If you’re trying to get over an ex, finding someone to help you with that is the easiest thing ever.
Be sure that you are completely over any baggage that is left from your past relationships; just help yourself with that.
You will end up hurting both of you if you start something new while you’re holding on to the baggage of your past.
17. Do you simply like the idea of liking him?
This is more confusing, but if you made a move on him before, if you tried to flirt with him, you really do like him. If not, then you’re in love with the idea of liking him.
We’re known for going after what we want. If you didn’t start something then you don’t truly want him.
18. If your phone rang right now and you saw his name on the screen, how would you feel?
If you immediately started hyperventilating in your mind at the thought of this, your heart started beating twice the normal speed and a huge smile formed on your face… Yup, you really like this dude.
19. If his hot best friend asked you out, would you go?
If you can’t even imagine this happening and you are repulsed by the idea… then you probably do have strong feelings for him. If you can’t see yourself going out with anyone else (no matter how hot they are), you know your feelings are legit.
20. How do your feelings compare to those you had for your ex?
If you feel like it’s really different this time and you can’t even compare it to anything, you might be onto something here.
But if it feels the exact same way as it did with your exes, you might not actually like him; you’re just stuck in an unhealthy pattern.
21. Can you picture yourself with him?
When you like someone, usually you picture yourself with him. Slowly you start imagining what a relationship would look like with him.
If you can picture yourself with him through the good and the bad, at all times, always by his side.
If that thought doesn’t scare you, then you’re definitely ready for a relationship and you really like him.
22. Have you ever talked to him?
If you never made a move, then you probably don’t like him. You just like the idea of him.
Since you’ve never done anything about that crush you feel, it’s probably something that won’t last for a long time.
Usually, the idea of falling in love is followed by making the first step, talking to the person you like, or asking them out on a date. The point is to establish contact and start dating him.
23. Are you lonely, or do you really like him?
This is a trap that is easy to fall into. Many people enter relationships only because they don’t want to end up alone.
They are scared of not falling in love, so they force themselves to fall in love only to avoid solitude.
So, if you only think of him at the end of the day, when you’re home and alone, that’s a bad sign.
It means you’re only trying to find someone to keep you company, someone who will prevent you from ending up single and miserable.
But, if you’re thinking about him even when you’re out with friends or in a crowd, then there is something special about that person. Then, you’ve definitely fallen in love with him.
24. Are you jealous at the thought of him being with someone else?
If just the thought of him being around other girls drives you crazy, then what you’re feeling is far more than just simple infatuation.
And, no, you’re not crazy for freaking out imagining him with other women despite the fact that you’re not with him.
This only means you really care about him and you want to be that special person in his life.
So if your answer to this last question is yes, then you really do like him and you don’t have to wonder anymore. Just go for it!
The last thing on your list should be to tell him how you feel.