We grow up learning how not to be a quitter, but sometimes quitting is necessary in order to succeed. Some of us are really good at knowing when to quit, while others have a hard time getting ‘unstuck’. It’s not easy knowing when to quit.
We tend to be stuck on things long after it’s obvious that what we’re doing isn’t working or that it’s not good for us. What’s important is that we train ourselves to quit in time.
Thankfully, life provides plenty of opportunities for us to do this. Here are some things that we should all quit doing.
1. Trying to please everyone
Pleasing everyone is literally impossible, simply because people are hard to please. Some people might not like how you work, some people might not like you or they may not even have a specific reason they can pinpoint.
Most people aren’t very logical and pleasing them will only leave you empty and exhausted. We all feel the need to be accepted and loved, so we please people in order to gain their love and trust.
But what we need to understand is that other people don’t share our hopes and dreams, other people don’t feel the way we feel, they don’t think the way we think and there are always going to be differences between us.
Giving up on any part of who we are to please someone, whether it’s our dreams, plans or anything else not important, is something we should immediately quit doing.
2. Fearing change
Change can be scary, whether it’s change that just happens to you or a change you need to make yourself. But in order to move forward, we need to embrace changes.
There is no use in staying at the same point in your life, miserable and depressed, when you know that you can only escape it if you take that one step into the unknown, whether to leave your partner, to quit your job or to move to a new country.
This is a change where you are in charge, and most of us stay in the same place because fear paralyzes us. Putting an end to your fear by choosing to stay right where you are and doing exactly what you’ve been doing, can provide a temporary relief.
You no longer have to worry about all of the ‘what-if…’ scenarios.
You no longer have to fear that big, scary, unknown future. But if you never initiate the change, especially a change that s you know deep down in your heart that you need to make, you will never know what might have been.
3. Living in the past
There is a difference between thinking about the past and living in it. Sometimes we live in the past because it’s familiar – we know what happened, there are no surprises.
When the past was really good, you can live there because just thinking back on it gives you feelings of comfort and happiness.
Living in the past is a problem because it robs you of the opportunity to enjoy the present. Living in the past allows you to avoid dealing with issues in the present.
Soak up as much of today as you possibly can – the sights, the sounds, the smells, the emotions, the triumph, and the sorrow.
Dream big. Set goals and plans for the future. Working hard today is always the first step toward realizing your dreams tomorrow.
4. Putting yourself down
No one usually succeeds the first time they try something. Just because you make a mistake here and there, or you don’t accomplish a goal in the time frame you gave yourself, doesn’t mean you’re a failure.
Look at all the things you have accomplished, and stop being so hard on yourself. And even if you haven’t had much luck in the dating department lately, that doesn’t mean it will always be like that.
You just have to meet the right person, and unfortunately, sometimes that isn’t something you can control.
All you can do is keep your chin up and be willing to meet new people. The rest will follow.
We all do dumb things sometimes, but just because you made a mistake does not mean you yourself are dumb. Calling yourself names is only going to make you feel worse.
Cut yourself a little slack and remember that one mistake does not define you as a failure.
Just remember to ask yourself this: Would you be friends with someone who talked to you the way you talk to yourself?
5. Overthinking
Most of us fall victim to some degree of overthinking – heavily weighing every single option before making a move, focusing on minute details of a situation and ignoring the big picture. In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear.
When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it’s easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you’re starting to spiral in that direction, stop.
Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.
No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of your time now.
Spending time on the future is simply not productive. Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.