Commitment. What a big and scary word.
Getting a man to commit is probably the final goal of every woman, to get him settled down in a relationship for the rest of his life.
Actually, there is nothing scary about commitment. Anyone can commit. It’s not a matter of possibility. It’s a matter of choice.
So, next time, someone tries to persuade you that they are unable to commit, remember that is one big pile of BS!
Commitment is a matter of personal choice.
It’s a matter of trusting someone and putting yourself and your future happiness into someone else’s hands.
And not just for you, for the other party, too.
Okay now, I know I’ve said commitment is a matter of personal choice, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t influence someone’s personal choice – not manipulate, but guide a person to do what they’ve probably already wanted but for some reason didn’t do.
It’s completely logical really.
On the plus side, by listening to advice on how to get him to commit and what not to do, you will turn yourself into a better and more considerate person.
You’ll pay attention to your actions and how they affect others. Let’s say this is definitely a win-win situation.
COMMIT: Blow his mind
You really have to work hard to impress him. You have to bring your A game.
Let’s face it, if he’s not impressed, he won’t commit to you, and frankly, why should he?
You really have to show him that you’re special, that you’re not like every other girl.
I’m sure you won’t have any problems with that if you really care about him.
SCARE AWAY: You’re suffocating him
Trying to impress him is one thing, but being all over him all the time is totally something else.
You have to know where to draw the line. You have to know how much attention is enough to keep him interested but not scare him away.
His personal space means everything to him as it does to any man—actually to all of us.
It’s essential we retreat to our safe places and spend some time away from everyone.
If you’re all over the place trying to impress him, it’s very possible that you’ll achieve exactly the opposite.
Try to keep a balance between not scaring him away and giving him some space to breathe.
COMMIT: Keep things fun
Don’t make things too serious too soon. Avoid talking about serious stuff because you’re not at that stage of the relationship yet.
Everything happens when it’s time for it to happen.
So, for starters, show him that you’re fun to be around.
That way, he won’t think twice about coming to you when he wants to relax and have fun.
Don’t be that girl who brings stress and drama in a relationship—no one likes that.
SCARE AWAY: Nagging
It’s never a good idea to start nagging about everything he does wrong, but it’s especially a bad idea when you do it at the beginning of your relationship.
If you’re bothered by something he does, wait for your relationship to get to a more serious level, and then talk about it like two mature adults.
If you mention it too early, you might get him to change, but that will just be temporary. Later on, he’ll probably resent you for that.
COMMIT: Pay attention to other people in his life
If he realizes that people he cares about like you, he will definitely consider doing the same.
Those around him will affect him positively by talking you up and saying what a great person you are in general.
If you’re good for his family and friends, he’ll realize you’re good for him, too.
SCARE AWAY: Being rude to others
He’s not an idiot, and he is well aware of how you’re acting to people around you.
If your behavior changes when you’re talking to someone other than him, he’ll notice it and take it as a huge red sign.
Naturally, you can’t change who you really are. So, if by any chance you are a jerk to others, good luck to you.
But, if you’re on the edge and you can control yourself, I suggest you do it—not just for his sake but for your own as well.
COMMIT: Don’t be too available
Don’t be at his disposal. Don’t come running every time he calls you because he’ll get the impression he can do whatever he wants with you.
So, play a bit hard to get, but don’t overdo it either or he might lose interest in you completely.
Also, by not being too available, you’re giving extra value to the time he gets to spend with you.
In time, he’ll only want more of you. Let him figure it out by himself.
SCARE AWAY: Making assumptions
Don’t make any premature decisions, especially if you’re still not that close with that person.
Don’t make assumptions that the two of you speak the same language and that he has the same mindset as you do.
Nor assume that he doesn’t like you and wants to call things off. Wait to get to know him a bit better, and then assume all you want.
COMMIT: Don’t force commitment
Even if commitment means a lot to you, act like it’s not such a big deal.
Don’t throw the idea of committing in his face because you might get a completely different outcome than you hoped for.
The thing is, men don’t like to be told what to do.
Chances are if they get the impression that you’re telling them what to do, they are definitely going to do something completely different just so things don’t end up your way.
SCARE AWAY: Making him accept your high maintance behavior
You’re high maintenance and that’s okay, but don’t expect him to support your behavior.
If you want nice things and have a standard you must maintain, make sure you take care of it on your own.