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To The Girl Who Deserves So Much More

To The Girl Who Deserves So Much More

Dear “Future Me”,

 

Here we go again. Everything all over again. One more heartbreak. One more disappointment.

More pain. So much pain.

How many jerks separate me from the real thing? How much misery can I take?

I’m done. I really am. I deserve better.

I know it is fine to cry your eyes out. I know that no one will blame me if I refuse to get up from bed for a few days. I know that’s all part of the ‘getting better’ process.

It’s just that I decided I won’t be going through that again. I’m done reliving that chapter of the book on my life.

Reality slapped me in the face really hard. It showed me that nothing is worth my pain and my suffering. Everything will be pointless if I lose myself—if I give in to defeat.

I’m not a loser. I can admit I’ve been beaten down, but I won’t accept it. I’m a fighter. I know what I deserve, and it’s not heartbreak.

It’s time to move on. It’s time to write a new story of my life all by myself. It’s time to forget about that sorry ass of a man who didn’t know how to love and respect me.

One day, he will see what a huge mistake he has made, and he will regret it. He will want me back. But, I will laugh in his face: “Goodbye honey, I’m done.”

Now, it’s time to rebuild myself. I need to find my self-worth and self-confidence again. You made me misplace it. You made me ignore my own well-being.

You made me scared of my own future.

I need to learn from my mistakes. I already am. I will never again let anyone take my heart and play with it until he gets bored. I deserve so much more than that.

I will go on and live my dreams because I’ve realized that nothing is impossible. It all depends on me. If I decide my dreams and only me is more important than anything else, it’s the first step to success. Things will only become better after that.

Sure, it takes time for the scars from the past to heal, but with time the scars will fade—they will become almost invisible. Why almost? Because they will always serve as a reminder what I’ve been through and what not to do.

So, here’s a reminder to myself—only I know what I truly deserve and only I can make it happen.

The rest of them can only observe—they cannot participate. I won’t let them.

 

Sincerely yours,

Me