Dear Husband,
I fell in love with someone else. Truth is, he makes me feel like no one ever has before. For once I feel like I have actually met my soulmate, that he is my person. When I look into his eyes, I feel like I’m looking into his mind, heart and soul. And for once I feel like my feelings are being reciprocated and I feel whole. No, he doesn’t make me whole like you once did. I’m finally my own person – I don’t need someone to make me whole again and I finally found someone who compliments me.
He doesn’t question me, he doesn’t doubt me nor what we have, and he believes in me and in us. He challenges me and has opened my eyes to a world I never knew existed. I’m more open-minded than I have ever been before. I’m so sick of staying the same and being stuck in this same routine. I want to be pushed, I want to be heard, I wanted you to genuinely care like he does. He listens, he tells me when I’m wrong because he wants to make me a better person, he argues back with me because he cares….. and he doesn’t ignore me.
I wanted you to hold me like he does, I wanted you to protect me like he does. I so badly wanted you to be a passionate lover like he is. I wish you would have opened up to me like he does. I thought I would have known you by now, after all these years.
But here is the truth: I know him more than I’ve ever known you. Finally, I’ve found myself, and more importantly I love myself more than I ever have before. This is because of him; he is the one who cared enough to make me strong and independent. He made me feel like I can do anything I set my mind to.
He tells me he is the luckiest man alive, he tells me how special I am to him every damn day. Did I tell you how he doesn’t ignore me? Well, he doesn’t. Even when he is at work, or out with his friends. Did I tell you how he wants to come home to me? But he can’t because I’m still with you, even though you’re not actually here. Not even close.
I’m not here to destroy you, I’m here to tell you that we weren’t made for each other. I know you will find someone and be a great lover to her, the one you couldn’t be to me. Truth is, I so badly wish he was you but you’re not him and can’t ever be him, and that is why I can’t stay one day, minute or second longer.
by Boers Kathleen