Cómo hacer amistad con una chica como un caballero de 15 maneras agradables

Let’s forget about sitcoms and romcoms just for a while. A las chicas también las friendzonean. And while it’s difficult to get friendzoned by a man you like, he’s also in an unpleasant situation. 

Imagina este escenario: tu amigo íntimo o compañero de trabajo te dice le gustas. Even though she is an attractive woman with a rocking personality, you don’t see her that way. 

¿Y ahora qué haces? ¿Cómo hacer friendzone a una chica sin romperle el corazón y dañar su bienestar mental? 

Worry not because I’ve got a step-by-step guide on friendzoning someone while being a verdadero caballero en el proceso. ¡Abróchate el cinturón! 

Cómo hacer amistad con una chica 

It’s actually pretty simple: all you have to do is follow each step mentioned below: 

1. Trátala como a uno de tus colegas

Esta chica es tu amiga platónica y puede que incluso tu alma gemela platónica. And I guess you have other platonic friends as well. If you’re not sure how to treat her, just imagine that she’s a guy.

No, you shouldn’t arm wrestle her or invite her to a soccer game if that’s not her thing. I’m talking about your relationship here – just act the same way you’d act with your male friends. 

Y asegúrate de que lo vea. Make sure she realizes that you treat her no differently than your buddies and that, basically, you don’t even notice she’s female.

Since you’re a true gentleman, this might be a bit tricky. I know that you respect and appreciate this woman. But even if you didn’t, you’d still feel the urge to open the door for her, buy her flowers on Women’s Day, or pay for her drinks. 

I have to disappoint you, but if you’re trying to figure out how to friendzone a girl, you must stop doing this. I know you’re just trying to be nice, but trust me, all of these small acts of kindness are easy to misinterpret. 

2. Dile que la miras como a una hermana

I’ll be honest with you: if you tell her this, you’re likely to break her heart. I mean, this is probably the last sentence you want to hear from someone you’re romantically interested in. 

Sin embargo, hay que hacerlo. Es la mejor manera de que esta mujer se dé cuenta de que no tiene ninguna posibilidad contigo.

Besides, it’s not far from the truth. Te preocupas mucho por ella y le deseas lo mejor. Sientes el impulso de protegerla, pero no tienes ninguna sentimientos románticos para ella. 

When we put it all together, she is like the sister you never had. Too bad she doesn’t see it that way. 

3. Arréglale una cita con uno de tus amigos

If you try and set this girl up with one of your guy friends, you’ll kill two birds with one stone. First and foremost, you’ll make it clear that you’re not into her. I mean, if you were, this would be the last thing you’d be doing. 

But there is one more advantage to this master plan. At the same time, you’ll make this girl feel wanted and attractive. 

You’re sending her the message that you think she’s worthy of love – it’s just that you can’t give her that type of love. 

Besides, maybe she’ll find happiness with your buddy. Maybe he knocks her off her feet, and she forgets you ever existed. 

The only flaw in this plan is your male friend. To be honest, this arrangement is not entirely fair to him. You know this girl has feelings for you, and you’re trying to set them up regardless. 

But hey, it’s not like you’re forcing them into anything – you’re just giving them a chance to get to know each other better. Everything else is up to them. 

4. Dile que tienes novia

Here’s a pro tip: if an acquaintance or un compañero de trabajo te está tirando los tejos or confesses her feelings for you, the best thing to do is tell her that you have a girlfriend. You don’t have to have “the talk” with her; it’s enough to casually mention you’re in a serious relationship.

Tell her how in love you are with your GF and that you two are planning on taking your relationship to the next level. This way, she’ll be too embarrassed to try haciendo que te fijes en ella.

Besides, you’ve somehow taken the responsibility off your shoulders. It’s not that you don’t like her – you’re already taken. 

However, you can’t use this awesome excuse when a close friend is in love with you. Sooner or later, you’d have to introduce your imaginary girlfriend to the world.

5. Háblale de tu vida amorosa

But here’s what you can do: you can talk about your past relationship with her. Even if you no longer have feelings for your ex, she doesn’t have to know that, does she?

Pídele una taza de café y tell her that you’ve been thinking about your ex-girlfriend a lot lately. You can even add that you two started talking again and that you’re considering getting back together. 

If you don’t want to drag your ex into this mess, just start casually mentioning that you’re falling for some new girl in your life. You don’t have to say that you’re in a relationship just yet, but one thing is for sure: you’re in love. 

Is this cruel? Absolutely yes! It will shatter this poor girl’s heart into a million pieces. 

But trust me when I tell you that it’s one of the nicest ways to send her to the friendzone. At least she’ll know where she stands. 

6. Don’t give her false hope

When you’re trying to figure out how to friendzone a girl, whatever you do, please don’t give her false hope. Trust me, it’s what will hurt her most. 

No sólo eso: arruinará su confianza en los hombres, e incluso podría dejar de creer en el amor. ¿De verdad quieres ser responsable de todo eso? 

Always make sure that you act like you don’t even notice that she’s of the opposite sex. Yes, you care for her very much, but not in that way. 

No matter what, you must tell her straight up. After all, we’re talking about a woman in love who will interpret everything you say or do as what she wants to hear and see in the blink of an eye. 

Por eso hay que tener mucho cuidado con ella. 

Don’t flirt with her, don’t make deep eye contact, don’t pay her too many compliments, don’t use her to make other girls jealous, and don’t send any other body language signs that you’re into her.   

7. Imply that she’s not your type

Once again, this is a hurtful way to friendzone a girl. But hey, a man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. Remember: you’re doing this to keep her heart from breaking even more. 

You have to make this woman realize that she’s not your type. But please, you can’t say anything that might offend her when explaining this. 

First of all, you won’t use her as an example at all. Let’s say that she’s blonde. You won’t tell her that you don’t like blondes. Instead, you’ll keep on checking out black-haired women and commenting on how crazy you are for that hair color. 

Por ejemplo, si un chica tímida le gustas, you can casually mention that you’re crazy about extroverted, outgoing girls. 

You can do the same about different personality traits, but whatever you do, don’t play this game with a body type. Even if she’s the prettiest woman in the world, her insecurities will surely skyrocket. 

8. Sin contacto físico

La mayor diferencia entre ser sólo amigos y estar en una relación romántica es intimidad física. 

I mean, you can spend a lot of your time with your good friends, text them all the time, and do other activities together. However, if you’re only friends with someone, you wouldn’t sleep with them, would you?

Bueno, déjame decirte que la forma más eficaz de friendzone alguien es retener el contacto físico. Sé que esta es tu buen amigoy probablemente quieras abrazarla de vez en cuando o besarla en la mejilla.

Créeme cuando te digo que esta no es la forma de mantener la amistad. Aunque estas caricias sean inofensivas para ti, ella podría interpretarlas como señales de lenguaje corporal de que te gusta.

Así que, por favor, no holding hands, no cuddling, no hugging (except when you two greet), no touching her face, no putting your hand on her knee… That is, of course, unless you don’t want her to become your romantic partner.

9. Don’t show her pity

Just because you’re wondering how to friendzone a girl doesn’t mean she’s lost much. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that you don’t have your own set of qualities or that you’re not an chico atractivo. Después de todo, ella se enamoró de ti por una razón.

You might be the biggest catch in the world, but that doesn’t mean that you should feel sorry for her. Even if you are sorry for the way things turned out, never show pity.

Trust me, that will ruin her confidence even more than your rejection. And don’t try to act like you feel sorry for her under false pretenses – if you two are really good friends, she’ll see right through you.

If you behave like this, she’ll feel even more miserable. Without even being aware of it, you’re sending her an indirect message that she is unworthy of anyone’s love.

10. Utiliza las redes sociales en tu beneficio

Okay, you obviously won’t put the word friendzone in your post’s caption – that would be too much and incredibly insensitive. But you can definitely use social media to send a message to this girl in real life.

Cada vez que publiques una historia o una foto con ella (o compartas su publicación), añade un montón de hashtags o gifs de amistad. Incluso puedes usar a estado de la amistad y subtítulos whenever you’re posting anything involving her online.

This way, all the other girls in your followers’ list will know that she is your best friend and nothing more.

Here’s another thing you should pay attention to: don’t reply with fire or heart emojis to her stories and don’t pay her too many cumplidos en los comentarios. Esto es otra cosa que podría ilusionarla.

Besides, this is how you treat a girl you’re hitting on – not your best friend.

11. Hágalo lo antes posible

The worst thing you can do is postpone this talk. If you’ve noticed that this woman is falling in love with you, you have to burst her bubble as soon as possible. I know that this is something you’d rather not do, but guess what? Nobody will do your dirty work for you.

Esto es especialmente importante si te ha confesado lo que siente por ti. If she’s just hinting and using body language signs to show you that she’s into you, you also can do the same back. However, if she’s spilled her heart out to you, she’ll expect an answer.

Besides, if this girl was brave enough to tell you she loved you, the least you can do is also be brave and tell her you don’t feel the same way. The longer you put it off, the worse her heartbreak will end up being.

So, be a man about it, set up a get-together without anyone else, and tell her everything that’s on your mind. Just make sure she doesn’t confuse this invitation with a date!

12. Explica tus razones para friendzonearla

Of course, you don’t have to explain the reasons why you’re putting her in the friendzone. You have the right to be attracted to whomever you want and not to be attracted to whomever you don’t want.

However, if you want to remain good friends, it would be nice to explain yourself. Don’t be cruel, and don’t think of only telling her that you don’t like her.

I’m not saying you should justify yourself. Just tell her that you don’t see her as a potential romantic partner, that you’re still in love with your ex, or that you just want to be single at the moment.

De este modo, su dignidad permanecerá intacta. Y esa debería ser tu intención en primer lugar.

She’ll realize that you’re not turning her down because she’s not worthy of your love, because you don’t see her qualities, or because you’re out of her league.

This is a kind of “it’s not you – it’s me” situation. And it doesn’t really matter whether what you’re saying is empty words – the point is to repair as much damage as possible.

13. Don’t use her as an ego boost

Here’s another thing you should never do: don’t take advantage of this girl’s feelings. I know that her love has had a positive impact on your self-confidence but think of the stakes if you start using her as an ego boost.

This is pretty much how it goes: the girl you’re into rejects you, you break up with the woman you loved, or you’re just going through a dry period. So you end up feeling bad about yourself. Your confidence disappears, and you start feeling unlovable and think that no other woman will ever want you again.

Y entonces te acuerdas de esta chica. Sabes que está desesperadamente enamorada de ti y decides regalarle un anillo. O tal vez burlarse de ellaenvíale señales contradictorias sólo para sacudir el barco y reavivar sus sentimientos.

Ella te da el empujón de ego que tanto necesitas y tú sigues con tu vida. Mientras tanto, a ella se le rompe el corazón una vez más.

So please, be fair and don’t even think about doing this. In fact, make sure you don’t do it unconsciously either, just because her attention suits you.

14. Ofrécele tu amistad

Now that you’ve established her position in your life, there is no need to cut this girl off. On the contrary, it’s your job to tell her that you two can still remain the same friends you were before all of this.

As far as you’re concerned, you’ll treat her the same way you treated her before she started growing feelings for her. You won’t talk to anyone about this, and you’ll never mention it again.

Demuéstrale que consideras vuestra amistad lo suficientemente fuerte como para superar este obstáculo. Esto no es más que una fase.

Besides, you love her (as a friend) enough not to let her go so easily. She hasn’t done anything to hurt you, betray you, or endanger your friendship.

15. Pero entiende que si ella declina

However, you have to prepare yourself for the possibility of this girl turning your offer down. If she tells you that she can’t be just friends, don’t see it as blackmail.

Make it clear that you’re sad about her decision, but don’t make a big scene about it – it will only make things more difficult for her. Don’t try convincing her to stay.

Remember that she’s cutting you off to heal in a healthy manner. Ya sabes lo que dicen: ojos que no ven, corazón que no siente.

Well, this girl couldn’t stand looking at you without being able to kiss you or text you without telling you she loves you. Most importantly, she couldn’t stand seeing you with other women.

Por lo tanto, si ella cree que es lo mejor, no tienes más remedio que desearle buena suerte. Quién sabe, quizá vuelva a tu vida cuando te haya superado. Entonces, podéis continuar donde lo dejasteis y volver a ser amigos.

¿Puede un chico hacer friendzone a una chica?

Sí, un tipo puede friendzone una chicay ocurre más a menudo de lo que imaginas. Aunque las películas y la cultura pop, en general, intentan convencerte de que las mujeres son las únicas que hacen friendzone a los hombres, la cosa va en ambos sentidos. 

Olvídate de la idea de que un chico estaría con todas las chicas del mundo si tuviera la oportunidad. No, no todos los hombres se arriesgarán e intentarán acostarse con una mujer a la que le guste. 

Algunos somos lo bastante decentes como para decirle a una chica lo que sentimos de verdad, aunque eso signifique herir sus sentimientos. 

¿Cómo se envía un mensaje a Friendzone?

If you want to friendzone a girl who you’re texting on a regular basis, you have to start by enviándole menos mensajes. I’m not telling you to ignore the poor girl completely, but you don’t have to send her a good morning text every day either, do you? 

Reply as a gentleman when she texts you, but try to leave it at that. Be as polite as possible, but don’t start new topics or engage in deep conversations.

Don’t send her innuendos or flirty jokes. Sé que puede resultarte gracioso, pero créeme, ella lo ve como una mirada de esperanza. 

Finally, it would be great if you could stop with heart and kissing emojis. If she’s your friend, I’m sure you have a habit of kissing her good night or replying with a heart reaction to her stories, but that has got to end. 

¿Cómo pedirle a una chica que sea tu amiga?

Si te confiesa lo que siente por ti, just tell her that you’d like to be friends. Estaría bien que explicara con más detalle su respuesta.

For example, you can tell her that you don’t want to ruin your friendship or that you simply don’t see her in a romantic way. Make sure she knows that you’re not doing this because you don’t find her physical looks or personality attractive. 

But what if she doesn’t make the first move, but you see that she’s developed feelings for you? In that case, you’ll have to be more subtle. Just tell her that you have a girlfriend or that you’re in love with someone else. Trust me, she’ll get the hint! 

Para terminar:

Since you’re wondering how to friendzone a girl, I suppose you’re sure about what you’re doing. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not trying to convince you into liking her. 

Al fin y al cabo, tienes derecho a que te guste quien quieras. Sin embargo, sólo quiero que pienses bien las cosas antes de actuar en consecuencia. 

I’d hate to see you regret your actions. 

Por otro lado, if you realize that this is what you really want to do, please, don’t let guilt get the best of you. You’ve done nothing wrong. 

Al contrario, es mucho más justo que engañarla y dejarla soñar despierta con que acabáis juntos. Créeme, puedes estar orgulloso de haber actuado como un perfecto caballero.