Cómo pedir una segunda cita: Reglas de oro para seguir adelante

Today, I’m going to play matchmaker, and teach you all about how to ask for a second date and keep the good times rolling. As a woman, I’ll offer a new perspective that could make all the difference.

Siento que mi experiencia me permite impartir algo de sabiduría y compartir mi segunda cita reglas, ideas y puntos de inflexión.

Para mantener el buen rollo después de la primera cita, te recomiendo encarecidamente que sigas leyendo.

Si consigues que una mujer acepte volver a verte, tus posibilidades de una tercera cita crecen exponencialmente.

Pero para que eso ocurra, necesitas acertar en tu primera cita (incluyendo primera cita beso) y saber cómo enfocar la idea de una cita de seguimiento.

I know guys tend to overthink things, which is why I’ve come up with this awesome guide where I’ll cover everything from date ideas to the golden rules you must obey.

Si quieres volver a ver a esa chica (y otra vez), here’s everything you need to know.

Véase también: ¿Por qué me quieres? Más de 120 formas encantadoras de responder a esta pregunta

¿Cómo conseguir una cita de seguimiento?

1. Conoce el momento adecuado para pedírselo

This means that you shouldn’t wait too long, or you might miss your boat. The optimal time period to ask is about three days after the first date.

This gives her enough time to figure out if she wants to see you again and it’s not too soon so you don’t appear clingy.

Texting her the next day is also a good start, simply to check up on her and see how she’s doing.

Esto le permitirá desarrollar un vínculo emocional que aumentará tus posibilidades de conseguir que vuelva a verte.

Try to arrange the date within seven days after the first one. It’s likely that you’re both busy, so finding the right time-frame might be a challenge.

If it takes a while to set it up, be sure to keep in touch to stay in her mind and show her you’re still into her.

Whatever you do, don’t ask her out again at the end of the first date.

This puts her on the spot and is somewhat awkward. If you’ve enjoyed a great first date, chances are you won’t have a problem getting a second one.

2. El sentido del humor es tu mejor amigo

Hacer reír de verdad a una chica es una forma segura de conquistarla. También puede serte útil para volver a invitarla a salir.

Wondering how to ask for a second date? Tease her in a playful manner! Girls love to laugh, and it’s much less likely that she’ll say no if you can make her laugh her booty off.

Here’s another useful insight. As a girl, trust me when I tell you that all women know how important they are. She can see how eager you are for round two, so you shouldn’t try too hard.

Let her know that you’d definitely be happy to see her again, but you won’t be too affected if she says no. That way, the ball is in your court.

If you decide to call her up, let the phone call be chill and with no pressure. Ask her how she is and what she’s been up to. Maybe throw in a subtle joke that can segway into what you wanted to ask her.

My main second date advice is to not take it all too seriously. Your life doesn’t depend on her answer. If she says yes, awesome. But if she doesn’t, life goes on!

Véase también: ¿Volverá? 13 señales de que tu ex quiere volver a intentarlo

3. Confía en lo que quieres

If you’re adamant to meet up with her again, show off your confidence.

Don’t be afraid to say something along the lines of ”Me gustaría mucho volver a verte.” This shows her you’re serious in your intent.

Naturalmente, la charla trivial es una forma eficaz de desarmar a la persona con éxito y aligerar el ambiente. Pero en algún momento, ponte los pantalones grandes y pregúntale con la máxima confianza.

Don’t create false assumptions that will steer you off your intentions. Her body language will tell you most of what you need to know.

Pero si se lo pides a través de una llamada telefónica, sé asertivo pero nunca demasiado insistente. Una pareja potencial dice que sí basándose en tu confianza, no en tus ideas para la cita.

Ask her as if this is your 10th date together. She’ll be much more likely to positively respond if she sees how much you really like her.

A la hora de pensar en cómo pedir una segunda cita, ten en cuenta que la confianza es clave y que la inseguridad desanima.

4. Disponer de un plan

Antes de pedírselo, piensa en un plan para vuestra próxima cita. Elige un lugar en el que haya insinuado que le gusta mucho o haz algo bonito y personal.

Así, cuando diga que sí, podrás sorprenderla con tu genial idea. Las chicas aprecian la preparación.

It shows your commitment and reliability. It’s reassuring not having to be always on top of things.

Knowing you’ve got it all planned out alleviates stress off her and makes her look forward to seeing you again.

Even if it’s just watching Netflix and ordering takeout, she’ll appreciate it because you initiated the whole thing. Also, low-key intimate nights in are the best date ideas ever!

Poner en streaming la película perfecta, preparar vino y palomitas y crear un ambiente romántico bajo luces tenues es todo lo que necesitas para conseguir una tercera cita.

If at the end of the date you don’t end up getting at least a sweet kiss goodbye, I’d be extremely surprised.

Véase también: ¿Te mandó un mensaje después de la primera cita, pero no desde entonces? Esto es lo que pasa

7 reglas de oro para segundas citas

If you don’t want to end up on Tinder and having to go back to online dating, it’s imperative you abide by these golden rules. They are your ticket to a mighty good time!

1. Don’t smother her with romance

Here’s a useful dating tip. Don’t be overly romantic so soon or you’ll have her run for the hills. You don’t need a dating coach to tell you that being all lovey-dovey after one date is off-putting.

Be laid back and let her see the real you. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not and just let things develop organically at their own pace.

Esta es tu gran oportunidad para conquistarla con tu intelecto y sentido del humor, y demostrarle que la última cita fue sólo una fracción de lo que podría llegar a ser.

Puedes hacerle algunas preguntas perspicaces para la segunda cita que le hagan cosquillas y consigan que se abra.

For example, ask her about where she grew up, what her biggest passions in life are, and if there’s anything she regrets in life.

Son lo suficientemente provocativas y pueden dar pie a una gran conversación en la segunda cita.

2. Deja hablar a la chica

I’m guessing since your first date went so great, you’re ready to start talking about yourself, thinking that’s the right move. It’s not.

Ahora tiene la oportunidad de hablar menos y escuchar más. Deja que tu pareja potencial comparta sus propias historias y cuente algunos chistes.

There are so many fun things you can cover. But it’s wrong to think you’re the only one worthy of talking.

Es tu momento de brillar de forma que ella vea lo amable, paciente y atento que eres.

Siéntate, escucha y empápate de todo. Esta chica te contará todo lo que quieras saber sin que tengas que hacer muchas preguntas.

The secret is in listening. When she feels like she’s being heard, chances of her opening up and wanting to see you yet again are enormous.

Véase también: Más de 140 frases para ligar insultantes e hilarantes

3. Don’t cut things short and show up on time

There’s always a chance of something coming up last minute that might affect your date. If it’s a work emergency or a family thing, it’s understandable.

But don’t schedule your date around a time you know might not be convenient for you. This is why weekends are your best bet.

Chances of something work-related creeping up are very low, and you can stay as long as you want because you don’t have to get up early in the AM.

Show your girl you care about giving her your time by being in the moment. Don’t think about anything other than being there and having a good time.

Girls can sense when there’s something else on your mind or if there’s somewhere else you need to be.

So just be there in mind, body, and spirit, or don’t bother showing up at all.

4. Deje de lado los ex-files y los temas controvertidos

I’m sure I don’t have to tell you this, but oversharing about an ex on your first date or the second is extremely undesirable.

Estos temas deberían guardarse para más adelante, una vez que vea si realmente tiene un futuro, lo que haría apropiado discutir tales asuntos.

Míralo de esta manera. ¿Cómo te sentirías si tu cita no dejara de hablar de su ex y de todas y cada una de las cosas que aman/desprecian de él?

My guess is that you’d feel overwhelmed, insecure, and unsure how to respond. Ex-files are for a later time with good reason!

Now is the time to get to know each other, open up, and figure out if there’s a spark between you two!

Así que evita hablar de tu ex, política, finanzas o cualquier otro tema posiblemente arriesgado sobre el que puedas encontrar opiniones contrarias. La cita número dos es para divertirse.

5. Don’t get distracted by your phone

To me, there’s nothing more infuriating or disrespectful than going on a date with someone who can’t lay off their phone. Seriously?

You want to have a conversation, get to know me, and get another date by grabbing your phone every 10 minutes? I don’t think so.

Take it from a girl who knows what she’s talking about. We HATE it when the guy pays more attention to their smartphone than us.

It’s okay if you don’t want to see me again, but why did you ask me out just to ignore me? Am I right?

Así que deja el móvil en silencio y dedícale toda tu atención.

Respétala lo suficiente como para mostrarle decencia común y entablar con ella una conversación de calidad. Si quieres volver a verla, esta es la única manera.

Véase también: Cómo saber si le gustas a tu pareja: 13 señales de que le gustas

6. Tener ojos sólo para ella

In translation – don’t look at every hot girl that walks by. Don’t make your date feel unworthy of your attention because you can’t resist seeing a fine piece of ass.

It’s extremely impolite in any social situation, but when you’re on a date, it’s the biggest no.

Have eyes only for the girl in front of you. Don’t look at anyone else unless just to say hi to someone you may know.

As a girl who’s been treated this way more than a few times, trust me when I tell you it sucks.

You don’t even know what goes through the girl’s mind when she sees you all flirtatious with other girls or how insignificant it makes her feel.

If you’re on a date with someone, be with them. Show them the respect they deserve by being interested in only them.

She doesn’t have to put up with this behavior. Don’t be surprised if you don’t hear from her ever again if you keep letting your eyes wander.

Mírela cuando hable con ella y esté realmente presente. Deja que te vea, que te escuche y que te aprecie.

7. Sé amable y hazle cumplidos

You know what they say: Kindness never goes out of style! Throw in a few compliments too, and you’re golden.

It’s really reassuring when you’re treated with respect, kindness, and generosity without expecting much in return.

Los chicos normalmente se comportan de cierta manera porque esperan cierta cosa (que una chica se ponga).

This is why it can get so confusing when a guy is being all nice and stuff, as you never know if he’s trying to get into your panties.

So my crucial bit of advice is to be on your best behavior without expecting anything in return. She doesn’t owe you anything for being kind.

Be a decent human being, it’s that simple. If things go great, you’ll eventually do the deed. But isn’t it nice to just get to know her first?

Las chicas responden bien a la paciencia. Ten paciencia con ella mientras se abre lentamente a ti, y te prometo que las cosas irán avanzando orgánicamente.

Véase también: Todo saldrá bien: 90 frases tranquilizadoras para los días malos

Ideas brillantes y creativas para una segunda cita

And now that we’ve covered the basic code of conduct, it’s time to see what your options are with regards to where to take her. Here are some fun ideas:

• Do karaoke

Singing, drinking, embarrassing yourself, and just laughing like crazy is all part of this deal. Doesn’t it sound like fun?

Súbete a tu pareja y diviértete como un loco. La vida es demasiado corta como para no cantar algunos éxitos clásicos de Mariah o Whitney medio borrachos delante de desconocidos. ¡A por ello!

• Happy hour shenanigans

You don’t have to wait for 8 PM to start your date. Go find a happy hour and enjoy an abundance of cheap drinks and fun conversations!

Life is so much more fun when you don’t play by the rules. Go break some and see how it feels. Have your favorite beverages in hand, watch the sunset, and just talk.

• An outdoor concert experience

¿Va a haber algún concierto cerca de donde vives o en los alrededores? Averígualo y llévatela.

Una noche llena de música en directo, bajo las estrellas y con alguien que te gusta está infravalorada. Creará un bonito recuerdo y os unirá el poder de la música.

Véase también: Persona adecuada, momento inadecuado: ¿por qué siempre nos pasa lo mismo?

• Go to a rooftop bar

A date with a view to die for… sounds too good to be true. But it’s totally not! That is if you’re lucky enough to have the pleasure of a gorgeous view where you live.

Simply find the nearest rooftop bar, wine and dine her under the stars with just the right vibe (romantic or lively, whatever you think she’d prefer). This is a winner! Simple, yet breath-taking!

• Take her on a scenic drive

Si crees que vuestra primera cita fue como la seda, haz algo diferente para la segunda y llévala a dar un paseo romántico en coche a algún lugar especial.

Plan a little picnic at a gorgeous spot (think of it in advance), bring a blanket, some food and wine, and after a hopefully pleasant, fun drive. Just relax under the sky and enjoy each other’s company.

• Hit the beach

Naturalmente, opta por esta idea sólo si el tiempo lo permite. Ninguna chica se negará a pasar un día divertido bajo el sol con un chico guapo.

Lleva crema solar, tentempiés y bebidas frías. Intenta encontrar un lugar apartado en el que podáis tener intimidad y disfrutar juntos. El día está para disfrutarlo.

Véase también: Citas sobre la belleza interior: 60 frases inspiradoras sobre lo que realmente importa

• A bonfire night

I can’t really say what it is about bonfires that strikes me as so magical and full of intimacy, but there’s definitely something there.

It’s fun, exciting, especially when there’s music and possibly other people around. See if she’d be into a group date, and you may even have a better time than you thought!

• Or go wine tasting

You won’t have to worry about her saying no if you opt for this cultural (yet boozy!) adventure! This is a great opportunity to get mildly drunk and find out a few useful tidbits about wine!

Tienes un gran pretexto para llevar siempre una copa de vino en la mano y que nadie te mire raro.

If this isn’t an ideal date, I don’t know what would constitute one! My point is – no girl will say no, so just go for it and seize your moment!

En conclusión

Hopefully, now you know how to ask for a second date, and more importantly – how to keep the fun going!

It’s all about confidence, sense of humor, some creativity, and not taking it too seriously. The girl just wants to have fun with you, and be shown some kindness.

Don’t turn something as fun and exciting as a date into in-depth research that will suck all the fun from it!

Follow the rules I’ve shared, and consider one of my brilliant second date ideas! Be creative and do things differently.

That way, you’ll leave a lasting impact and probably get a third date!

Ladies love to be shown some creativity and manners. Take her somewhere she won’t see coming and treat her like she’s the only woman there.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what you look like or what you’re wearing. If you make her feel safe, comfortable, and special, there’s no doubt you’ll be seeing her again!

Véase también: Dinámicas de relación: Qué son y a qué hay que prestar atención