No puedes controlar a quién echas de menos, pero puedes controlar quién está en tu vida

Cuando miss someone you know you shouldn’t, you can’t help but feel guilty.

After everything this person has done to you and after all the pain they’ve caused you, it’s natural that you want them out of your life and system as soon as possible.

Esto vale para todos los que te han abandonado y especialmente para tus ex novios. Al fin y al cabo, eran los hombres con los que querías compartir tu vida y a los que más querías.

Esto va por todos esos tipos que te rompieron el corazón, que te engañaron o que se alejaron de ti sin mirar atrás.

For all the guys who didn’t want to label your relationship, who ghosted you, and who left you hanging.

Or are we talking about a specific man? A man you can’t get out of your head, as much as you try?

En cualquier caso, el resultado final es el mismo: You feel like by missing him, you’re betraying yourself.

You’re giving him even more power over your heart and soul. You’re giving him meaning and purpose.

After all, you’ve kicked him out of your life, so why can’t he be gone from your heart, as well?

Are you that weak that you don’t have the ability to see things clearly and to stop missing someone who doesn’t deserve your attention?

Bueno, la respuesta es: sí. En realidad, todos lo somos.

No hay persona viva que pueda controlar a quién ama y a quién echa de menos. Quien diga lo contrario miente.

So, you’re not an exception. Remember: you’re a human being made of flesh and blood – not a robot who can be programmed and whose emotions can be switched off and on.

Therefore, it’s perfectly natural that you can’t control your thoughts and feelings and that you don’t have the capacity to order your heart and mind around. 

Sin embargo, lo que sí puedes controlar es quién entra en tu vida. Puedes controlar quién tiene acceso a ti y quién se siente honrado con tu presencia. 

Puedes controlar a quién dedicas tu tiempo, tu energía, tu paciencia.

Básicamente, what I’m trying to say is that you should stop blaming yourself for echar de menos a alguien. 

I know that sometimes you feel crazy and you can’t believe that you still have feelings for the man who has hurt you so much.

However, it’s completely normal to feel this way. In fact, most women go through the same thing after a devastating breakup.

Créeme cuando te digo que todo esto forma parte de tu recuperación. Es solo una fase del proceso de superación.

So, don’t put yourself down for all the overwhelming emotions you feel. Don’t burden yourself for feeling the way you do. 

Instead of seeing yourself as a weak woman, be proud of your strength. Be proud that you have the power to resist your urges, instincts, and heart’s desires.

After all, you’re not allowing this man back in your life, despite the fact that you miss him, are you? You’re not giving him a second chance, even though there are times when you feel like you’ll die without him by your side. 

You’re not on this man’s doorstep, begging him to come back, despite the devastating pain that’s been killing you from the inside.

You’re not letting him see what an naufragio emocional y no le das la satisfacción de saber que aún sientes algo por él.

En eso consiste la valentía. Eso es lo que significa la fuerza interior: luchar contigo mismo cada día y ganar cada una de esas difíciles batallas. 

So, keep on missing him – nobody can deny you that right. Miss the man and love him for as long as you want.

Don’t repress your emotions and don’t pretend that they don’t exist. 

Aprende a vivir con ellos y en cuanto lo hagas, te prometo que se irán. En cuanto dejes de huir de tus demonios, te prometo que dejarán de perseguirte.