11 señales inequívocas de problemas de confianza y cómo superarlos
Tener problemas de confianza es habitual, incluso en relaciones sanas. Pero no mucha gente está dispuesta a admitir que los tiene.
¿Qué caracteriza a los problemas de confianza? Una falta total de confianza en los demás, esperando constantemente algún tipo de traición y un miedo malsano al abandono.
La falta de confianza es habitual en las relaciones sentimentales (debido a experiencias negativas del pasado), pero también con los miembros de la familia y con casi cualquier persona que se cruce en tu camino.
Numerous factors play a role in your lack of ability to build trust. Sometimes, it’s due to a relación tóxica que resultó en una grave traición a la confianza, lo que te hace desconfiar de tu pareja actual.
Esto, a su vez, afecta negativamente a su relación actual, ya que recuperar la confianza ya no le resulta natural.
Si un ser querido te engañó en el pasado, podría hacer que crearas un mecanismo de defensa para evitar que te vuelvan a hacer daño.
If any of this rings a bell, and you’re having a hard time figuring out the root of your issues, keep reading.
The signs below will help you figure out why you can’t seem to trust others and how to stop letting this affect your new relationship.
Véase también: Confía en mí, estás exactamente donde necesitas estar ahora mismo
¿Tengo problemas de confianza? Vea los signos más comunes
Has a toxic loved one affected your mental health so much that building trust feels impossible? There’s only one way to find out…
Se anticipa a un abuso de confianza sin tener motivos para ello
¿Tengo problemas de confianza si encuentro algo malo en las situaciones más inocentes? Sin lugar a dudas.
Tu falta de confianza se acentúa realmente en tu incapacidad para relajar tu mente y disfrutar de una conexión genuina. Lo más probable es que te mantengas cerrado en todas tus relaciones (románticas y platónicas).
Al fin y al cabo, éste es tu mejor mecanismo de defensa. Te dices a ti mismo que si te mantienes alerta en todo momento, no habrá traición que se te escape.
Pero lo que no comprendes es que eso mismo te está haciendo traicionarte a ti mismo y a tus posibilidades de ser feliz.
Evitas el compromiso cuando se trata de relaciones íntimas
It’s not that you’re hesitant to enter a romantic relationship. You’ve probably done okay on that front, but only on the surface.
While you keep telling yourself that your current relationship is on the right track, deep down, you know you’re not fully invested. Not emotionally, anyway.
Usted ha desarrollado un caso grave de fobia al compromiso that you keep justifying to yourself. But the thing is, I don’t think you believe your reasonings at all anymore.
It’s just something you want to believe so that you can keep entering shallow relationships and avoid the risks that come with a deeper relationship.
Nunca te abres de verdad a nadie
You never let anyone know the real you. When’s the last time you shared your fears and insecurities with a loved one?
My guess is it’s been a while. I understand, though. Your trust issues have to stem from somewhere. Whoever caused you to be this untrusting must’ve done a real number on you.
Esto ha hecho que nunca dejes que nadie se acerque lo suficiente como para traspasar tus muros. Esta es la razón por la que tienes cuestiones de compromiso. But did you know that this isn’t healthy for your mental health?
You can’t keep going through life not sharing anything with anyone. One day, you’ll realize the severe consequence of this unhealthy lifestyle.
Véase también: Una chica con problemas de confianza te ruega que no hagas estas 12 cosas
La mayoría de tus relaciones son volátiles
Every new relationship you enter fizzles out due to its draining nature. You either pick someone who’s not on your wavelength, or you go for the unattainable type.
Either way, it’s volatile and unhealthy. There is no peace, harmony, or understanding that a healthy relationship should have.
Hay montones de problemas de confianza, discusiones locas y apasionadas, y probablemente os lo montéis todo en el dormitorio.
If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say that your steamy sessions are the only thing keeping you with your current partner. Because, if there’s no trust, what is the relationship based on?
Te enfadas sin razón por un error honesto
Te atascas en cosas que otros simplemente se encogerían de hombros y dejarían pasar. Tu tolerancia a los errores (o a cualquier tipo de traición, por pequeña que sea) es nula.
This is what makes it so daunting to be in a relationship with you. Disappointing you is not an option, and when your partner or anyone close to you makes a tiny mistake, they know you’ll go off on them.
Se trata de un clara señal de problemas de confianza. En el momento en que alguien que te importa hace sin querer algo un poco molesto, te lo tomas demasiado en serio por miedo a que desemboque en algo aún peor.
Most of your friendships aren’t very deep
This is difficult to admit to yourself, but it’s necessary if you’re eager for things to change. You know a lot of people, but you’re not too close to many of them.
You get coffee, go on an occasional night out, and text now and again. But when it comes to a genuine connection and being able to call them at 2 a.m. during an emergency, it’s a no-go.
That’s what profundos problemas de confianza te hacen. Hacen imposible tener un grupo sólido de personas a las que puedas llamar amigos íntimos.
Desconfías de cada persona nueva que conoces
Cada vez que una persona nueva entra en tu vida, te entran ganas de echar un vistazo a sus plataformas de redes sociales para ver su trato.
Te mantienes a una distancia saludable, a pesar de no tener motivos para ello, y nunca te permites contar demasiado sobre tu vida. Incluso si se trata de un amigo de un amigo, siempre estás en guardia.
If you’re honest with yourself, you can see how messed up this is, but you just can’t help it. You’d love nothing more than to trust others with more ease, but no such luck.
Esto, a su vez, ha empezado a abrir una brecha entre usted y sus seres queridos que cada vez es más difícil de superar.
Tus seres queridos te consideran imposible de complacer
Be honest, have your loved ones ever confronted you with your inability to trust and how it’s affecting your relationships?
Have you ever been told that you’re virtually impossible to please and how annoying it’s becoming? And have you ever taken the time to consider what they’re saying?
Regardless of the cause of your distrustfulness, when it starts messing with your most precious relationships, it’s time to start doing something about it.
If you don’t, every relationship you hold dear will soon start to unravel.
Véase también: Lo siento si mis pensamientos excesivos hacen que sea difícil quererme
You’ve started to feel like an outcast
Como era de esperar, todo esto ha hecho que empieces a sentirte alejado de la gente.
Slowly but surely, you’ve stopped getting invited anywhere, and you feel yourself slipping away from the few people you felt close to.
You never thought you’d say this, but you’re starting to feel like an outcast. Not just from your friends, but your family too.
While this is not something anyone should ever go through, you have to be aware that it’s self-inflicted. When you keep letting your trust issues taint your relationships, what can you expect?
Te cuesta perdonar y dejar ir
If you experience a betrayal of trust, you don’t ask questions. You write them off from your life. There’s no talking to you.
If someone’s not perfect and without faults, they don’t deserve a place in your life. That’s what you tell yourself.
Forgiving is not something you’re accustomed to. Letting go of things is even more challenging. Even if you tried, you’d just keep replaying that one slip-up in your head over and over.
You know that relationships are far from perfect, and that being able to forgive is vital. But for some reason, you just can’t.
You’re distrustful of people in general
Regardless of whether it’s a close friend, family member, or a romantic partner, you double-check everything you’re told.
You’re not sure where this need has come from, but you take everything you hear with a pinch of salt.
Como era de esperar, ésta es una característica de la mayoría de las personas con problemas de confianza. Su autoestima está gravemente dañada, ya que las experiencias vitales y las relaciones pasadas les han hecho ser así.
La confianza hay que ganársela, y hasta ahora sientes que nadie se ha ganado la tuya. But here’s the deal. If you want to create meaningful relationships, you have to start working on rebuilding your self-esteem.
Some of the reasons why you cannot build trust with anyone are legit. But sometimes, it’s all in your head.
Si una persona te ha dado cero razones para dudar de sus intenciones, ¿por qué hacerte pasar por semejante calvario?
Véase también: 8 maneras de volver a ponerte en pie después de que la gente te decepcione
Cómo superar los problemas de confianza en 5 sencillos pasos
Así es como, poco a poco, puedes volver a confiar en los demás. Nada sucede de la noche a la mañana, pero con un poco de esfuerzo, las cosas pueden cambiar para mejor.
Accept that sometimes, you’ll be let down (and you’ll survive)
In case you haven’t heard, nobody’s perfect. Therefore, expecting everyone around you never to do anything wrong is naive.
What I want you to do is try to accept the fact that, yeah, people will disappoint you sometimes. It’s going to suck, but guess what? It happens to all of us, and we all get through it. So will you.
When you start seeing life for what it is, as opposed to what your preconceived notions keep telling you, you’ll be able to form genuine bonds with people.
You’ll start seeing that just because your partner messed up one time doesn’t mean they don’t have your best interest at heart.
Si su mejor amigo had to flake on you due to an emergency, that doesn’t make them a bad person.
Sólo significa que la vida se interpuso. Las cosas pasan, las afrontamos y seguimos adelante. ¡Inténtalo!
Véase también: El significado de "Sin expectativas no hay decepciones" (+ citas)
Permítase ser vulnerable y asumir riesgos emocionales
We all struggle sometimes. Heck, even Drake wrote a song about the very topic of this article. Check out his ‘Trust Issues’ lyrics, and you’ll see that not even global superstars are immune to being distrustful.
I’m saying this to help you realize that without putting yourself out there, you’ll never be truly at peace. Be vulnerable. Allow someone to break your heart (all the while, hoping that they won’t).
We all take risks every single time we give our hearts away. There’s no way around it. So take a leap of faith and let your guard down. Be emotionally invested and experience true connection.
Don’t you think it’s high time to start letting go of the burdens of your past?
Don’t give out trust freely – people have to earn it
Drake’s ‘Trust Issues’ aside, this is something you surely understand. Giving your trust away just like that is not an option.
If someone wants to be in your inner circle, they’ll have to earn it. But, this doesn’t mean you should be cold and distant. Just because you’re unsure of someone’s trustworthiness doesn’t mean you need to ice them out.
Be friendly and cordial, especially when meeting new people. You don’t have to relay the story of your life to them.
Lo que usted puede lo que sí hay que hacer es esforzarse por conocerlos, darles el beneficio de la duda y ver qué pasa.
Determina la raíz de tu desconfianza y ENFRÉNTALA
It’s time to see where your trust issues come from. Has your past relationship made you wary of trusting someone new?
¿Ha experimentado un trauma por traición within your family that you still haven’t gotten over? Whatever it was, face it head-on!
The longer you suppress it, the worse you’re going to be mental health-wise. Perhaps el momento de tu vida is giving you a unique opportunity‚7 for a clean slate.
All you have to do is think back to your past issues and face your demons. It sounds scary, but actually, it’s so cathartic!
Aprende de tu pasado, pero no dejes que te frene
A la hora de aprender a superar los problemas de confianza, puedes dejar que tus experiencias pasadas sean tus aliadas. ¿Cómo? Muy sencillo. Reconociendo lo que ocurrió y negándote a que influya en tu presente.
Don’t be the victim of your past. Don’t let it prevent you from enjoying what life has to offer. Whether you were engañado, abandonado o manipulado emocionalmente, acaba con la tortura que permanece en tu cabeza.
Aprende de las desgracias de tus experiencias vitales y no permitas que vuelvan a retrasar tu crecimiento emocional.
Understand that you’re stronger than you give yourself credit, and start taking risks in life. Your lack of trust is suppressing you in more ways than one. Stop letting it!
Véase también: Citas sobre la confianza rota: 80 citas sobre la traición y tener problemas de confianza
Citas reveladoras sobre problemas de confianza
1. “‘Sorry’ works when a mistake is made, but not when trust is broken. So in life, make mistakes but never break trust. Because forgiving is easy, but forgetting and trusting again is sometimes impossible.” – Unknown
2. “Not everyone can be trusted. I think we all have to be very selective about the people we trust.” – Shelley Long
3. “Breaking someone’s trust is like crumpling up a perfect piece of paper. You can smooth it over, but it’s never going to be the same again.” – Unknown
4. “Sometimes, the people that love you the most turn out to be the people you will trust the least.” – Shannon L. Alder
5. ”The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” – Ernest Hemingway
6. “Only trust someone who can see these three things in you: the sorrow behind your smile, the love behind your anger, and the reason behind your silence.” – Unknown
7. “If you have three people in your life that you can trust, you can consider yourself the luckiest person in the whole world.” – Selena Gomez
8. ”Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters.” – Albert Einstein
9. “Trust is hard to come by. That’s why my circle is small and tight. I’m kind of funny about making new friends.” – Eminem
10. “Sometimes, you don’t know who you can and cannot trust. I still learn that over and over again.” – Demi Lovato
11. “You can’t trust a promise someone makes while they’re drunk, in love, hungry, or running for office.” – Joe Moore
12. “Trust is a fragile thing. Easy to break, easy to lose, and one of the hardest things to ever get back.” – Unknown
13. “Trust is not the same as faith. A friend is someone you trust. Putting faith in anyone is a mistake.” – Christopher Hitchens
14. “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they’re right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart, so better things can fall together.” – Marilyn Monroe
15. “It’s hard to trust when all you have from the past is evidence of why you shouldn’t.” – Unknown
16. “‘It was a mistake,’ you said. But the cruel thing was, it felt like the mistake was mine, for trusting you.” – David Levithan
17. “Be careful who you trust. If someone will discuss others with you, they will certainly discuss you with others.” – Unknown
18. “I don’t trust anybody. Not anybody. And the more that I care about someone, the more sure I am they’re going to get tired of me and take off.” – Rainbow Rowell
19. “To trust people is a luxury in which only the wealthy can indulge; the poor cannot afford it.” – E.M. Forster
20. “Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” – Stephen R. Covey
21. “The worst thing about being lied to is knowing you are not worth the truth.” – Jean-Paul Sartre
22. “Don’t trust too much, don’t love too much, and don’t hope too much. Because that too much can hurt you so much.” – Unknown
23. “Don’t ever break someone’s trust. Once you do, then nobody wants to do business with you.” – Robert Budi Hartono
24. “Trust is not simply a matter of truthfulness or even constancy. It is also a matter of amity and goodwill. We trust those who have our best interests at heart, and mistrust those who seem deaf to our concerns.” – Gary Hamel
25. “You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don’t trust enough.” – Frank Crane
26. “Loving someone is giving them the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to.” – Julianne Moore
27. “There are ways you can trust an enemy. You can’t always trust a friend. An enemy’s never going to betray your trust.” – Daniel Abraham
28. “Trust your hunches. They’re usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level.” – Joyce Brothers
29. “People with anxiety and trust issues find themselves drawn to people of consistency because they feel safe with someone predictable. However, that doesn’t cure the problem. The anxious person remains the same because anxiety is a wave that crashes on the shore every time an unpredictable circumstance challenges their expectations and comfort zone.” – Shannon L. Alder
Véase también: 21 pasos cruciales para recuperar la confianza en una relación
All Things Considered…
If you’ve been struggling with trust issues that have started to take control of your life, this article is right up your alley.
Your lack of trust can’t be ‘cured’ overnight, but now you’re armed with the tools you need to start rebuilding trust and get your life back on track!
Enfrentarse a tus demonios da miedo, ¡pero vivir tu vida conteniéndote constantemente da más miedo! Perdona a quienes te han hecho daño con el único propósito de seguir adelante y hacer borrón y cuenta nueva.
Te mereces ser feliz. Sólo hace falta esfuerzo y perseverancia. Confía en ti mismo que puedes superarlo, y te aseguro que algún día, lo 100% harás.
Véase también: Aprenda a confiar en el universo en 10 sencillos pasos
