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He’s Just Not That Into You

He’s Just Not That Into You

Maybe he isn’t texting back because he’s busy. Maybe he didn’t mean to like that other girl’s picture. Maybe he forgot to reply to your Snapchat. Maybe he is scared of commitment. Maybe he thinks you don’t like him so he’s playing it cool.
Or maybe – he’s just not that into you.

As women, we constantly make excuses for men and we always allow ourselves to believe that there is another reason we don’t feel happy. At our lowest point, we cling on to any form of affection from a man. I’ve been there, and I’m sure most women reading this will have been through it, too, If you haven’t and you’re fortunate enough to already know your self-worth, keep a strong hold of it!

As much as we hate to admit it, everyone wants to be loved by someone. Being loved and adored by someone is one of the best feelings in the world, and when we are feeling self-conscious or have low self-esteem, we cling on to the tiniest bit of affection. So as Alex from ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’ so perfectly put it: “If a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a shit, he genuinely doesn’t give a shit. No exceptions.”

How many times have you turned to your best friend and asked, “Am I being a psycho?” or, “Is it me?” Men will say all the right things, they will say exactly what they want you to hear. Now whether this is because they want to use you for sex or because you’re someone to give them a bit of an ego boost, I don’t know, but guys like this show all the same signs…

They don’t text you back for hours, but they are active on Facebook. They don’t reply to your WhatsApp but they will open your Snapchat. They will never arrange a ‘proper’ date with you – it will always be ‘Netflix and chill’ or ‘a few drinks’ in a bar and it will more than likely be YOU who has to arrange a time and date. When you first start texting, they will ask you what you like to do – you know, the ‘Tinder chat’ – but a typical ‘fuckboy’ will only wait approximately 3 days before turning the conversation sexual. If you find yourself texting a boy and the conversation is constantly about sex before you’ve even gone on a date with him, you can pretty much be certain that sex is all he’s interested in.

 

Young man in bed smoking cigarette

 

If you are constantly questioning your sanity, if you are constantly checking your phone for a reply and if you are constantly waiting for them to show their commitment to you, I am telling you – he’s just not that into you. Don’t let men fool you by saying, “I’m just easy-going” or, “I’m never on my phone” or, “I just want to take it slow”. No. If a boy gives a shit about you, they will show it! Don’t ever question your sanity or your self-worth over a man who is quite frankly not worth it! Don’t waste YOUR time on them.

It is so important to remember your self-worth. Do you think that any man is sitting at home staring at his phone waiting for you to text? Do you think he is asking his friends why you’re not texting back? I doubt he is. Now I’m not saying all men are the same because they most certainly aren’t, and I’m not saying all women fall for this because not all do, but this article is for the women, like myself, who often fall for the men who are this way.

If you have been treated this way, your self-confidence drops, and then you crave someone who will treat you right, so you move onto the next person who shows you the slightest bit of affection. If they happen to be a ‘fuckboy’ too, we end up in a vicious cycle. The best thing you can do after coming out of this kind of ‘situationship’ is to spend time on your own before looking for love again. Whether it’s a month or six months that you spend alone, just do something for you. Wake up and take yourself for coffee on a Sunday or get a book and walk to the park and read once a week. Just spend time focusing on you and nobody else.

You are not asking for much by wanting a text back and you are not asking for much by asking for commitment! These are factors that a man who cares about you would give you without any doubt. If a man is interested in you, you will have no doubts, no worries and no questions, and once you realize your self-worth, you will have no trouble ensuring you never feel unworthy again. You will realize when the perfect man is just that into you.

by Samantha Russell