‘I don’t deserve to be happy’ is a sentence I hear very often nowadays. These modern times have brought us some good things, but, unfortunately, it’s a fact that they’ve also brought us depression and similar health issues.
The truth is, we all deserve to be happy, to live a happy life. Dealing with these thoughts can really poison your life.
If you don’t do anything to change your thought pattern, you’ll only become a lonely, sad person. That’s why you must never push it deep inside. You need to stand up and fight it. Fight it and come out of that fight a winner.
I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy: 9 Reasons You Have These Thoughts
Before I reveal some secrets that will help you win the fight, you must first know the root cause of these negative thoughts you’re experiencing. And you’ll find your reason amongst these nine below:
1. You’ve never known true happiness
We all spend our lives in the pursuit of happiness, and the truth is, most of us don’t even know what true happiness looks like.
For some of us, expensive cars, designer clothes, and money define happiness. On the other hand, the health of our loved ones represents true happiness for a very small group of us.
Social media have also imposed very wrong portrayals of happiness on us, and, unfortunately, that’s why most of us have forgotten what true happiness means.
And it really is that… Being healthy and surrounded by people we honestly love and care about is true happiness.
2. Low self-esteem
If someone has self-esteem issues, they might feel unworthy of the good things and positive emotions like love and happiness.
They might even feel like they’re a bad person and that God won’t allow them to be happy. Even if they’ve done bad things, there is always the possibility of redemption. God is forgiving, and He would never want us to be miserable.
3. Being overly self-critical
Being self-critical is the worst thing someone can do to themself. We all need to understand that we all are human beings with flaws and good traits.
We all make mistakes, and we need to accept ourselves as we are: perfectly imperfect human beings.
If you always think that you’re doing something wrong or that you aren’t good enough, of course, you’ll feel undeserving of happiness. You just need to be more gentle about accepting yourself with all of your imperfections because they’re part of who you are.
4. Mental health issues
If you’re struggling with depression or anxiety, that might be the reason you’re having these suicidal thoughts. Or, if you have a mental illness in your family history, you should also pay attention to it.
When someone has mental health issues, it automatically affects their self-esteem and self-image. Almost every person with a mental illness has had suicidal thoughts at least once in their life.
5. Past traumas
Childhood traumas are one of the most common reasons someone might feel undeserving of happiness.
If you’ve never known happiness as a child, then you don’t know what it looks like, and you blame yourself and think that it’s because you’re unworthy of this positive emotion.
6. Being manipulated by an abusive partner
An abusive partner uses many techniques to play with their victim and make them stay in that abusive relationship. Manipulation is by far their favorite.
They’ll always try to shift the blame onto their victim and make them think they deserve all the bad things that are happening to them.
7. Survivor’s guilt
When someone experiences an accident or goes through something really bad (like an illness) and survives it, but other people who went through the same die, they are left with survivor’s guilt for the rest of their lives.
Because of that guilt, they start thinking that they don’t deserve to be happy. It’s like they’re trying to punish themselves for what happened, even though they weren’t guilty of it.
8. Losing their sense of self
Let’s admit it, at least once in our lives, we all ask ourselves who we are and what our purpose in this life is. Unfortunately, some people become stuck on those thoughts and completely lose their sense of selves.
And when someone loses their sense of self, they stop caring about happiness. Actually, they stop caring about everything because they feel like they don’t deserve to be alive.
9. Bad things you did in the past
Even though some people try to hide it or deny it, the truth is, we all have consciences. When we do something bad, it haunts us until we repent for it or fix it.
If you have done some bad things and things you aren’t proud of in the past, it could be why you don‘t feel worthy of happiness. Until you sincerely repent for those bad things, you won’t be able to shake off this terrible feeling.
I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy: 9 Tips To Overcome It
1. Make amends… Start with yourself
Forgive yourself for all the bad things you’ve done. Forgive yourself for feeling undeserving of happiness. Forgive yourself for being that unfair towards yourself.
That will be the beginning of your pursuit of happiness. And it’s the only way you’ll ever obtain it.
2. Take better care of your mental well-being
You should know that you wouldn’t be dealing with these kinds of thoughts if you didn’t have fragile mental health. You need to pay more attention to it and not let others affect your well-being, no matter what.
3. Let go of negative thought patterns
You need to find a way to get rid of those negative thoughts and emotions. Don’t focus only on the bad things in life – try to look at the positives too.
If you don’t try to fight those thoughts you’re currently experiencing, your mental health will be seriously damaged. You control your thoughts, not the other way around – always remember that.
4. Stop feeling guilty
You can’t be guilty of everything that happens. Even if you’ve done something wrong or made a mistake, you can’t allow these feelings of guilt to eat you up inside.
Try to fix your mistake and let go of it once and for all. That guilt complex can become a heavy burden, and it really can make someone question their sanity.
5. Practice self-care every day
You need to shift the focus onto self-care – it’ll have a positive impact on your self-worth and self-esteem. Once you strengthen your confidence, you’ll be able to fight these negative emotions and thoughts.
Fall in love with even the smallest piece of yourself. Your flaws, just like your qualities and good parts, need to be loved and taken care of in the right way.
6. Paint a different and more beautiful body image
When someone feels unworthy of something, it’s mostly because they have the wrong self-image and are struggling with self-doubt.
Appreciate every little thing about yourself, even the things you don’t particularly like. Work on building a better body image, and you’ll see the effect it’ll have on your confidence.
7. Turn to a health professional for help
You can talk to your loved ones about the thoughts you’re experiencing. You can try to find a way to help yourself with podcasts about behavioral health and similar.
However, the best and fastest way to get rid of those negative and suicidal thoughts is by seeking professional help.
An expert will know the right way to help you, and they’ll also teach you how to take care of your mental health so you don’t find yourself in this position ever again.
8. Understand that you’re worthy of happiness!
Happiness is available to all of us. No one can forbid you or stop you from being happy. No one except you. If you keep thinking those ‘I don’t deserve to be happy’ thoughts, you’ll stay miserable for the rest of your life.
If you get rid of them, on the other hand, and decide to be happy no matter what, you’ll find true happiness. Keep in mind that everything is, well, in your mind.
9. And remember, you’re in charge of your own happiness
You can make yourself happy. It’s nice to have those close to you around you, but the truth is, you’re everything you need to be happy.
Don’t ever allow anyone to stand in the way of building a happy life. If someone is destroying your peace of mind, you should kick them out of your life.
Do You Deserve To Be Happy?
Of course, you do. Every single person deserves to be happy, to be free, to make their own choices, to be surrounded by their loved ones, and to live their lives to the fullest.
And the best thing is that no one can stand in the way of your happiness. No one can forbid you from being happy. Not if you don’t allow them to.
Happiness is your one and only choice. Happy people are happy because they chose it and didn’t allow others to affect their happiness.
I hope you’ll delete this ‘I don’t deserve to be happy’ sentence completely from your mind. It will only lead you to do bad things and have even worse thoughts.
We all deal with difficult situations, and we all have different sorrows. However, the point is to always look on the bright side of life. Focus on good things, think positively, and you’ll see that you‘ll be overwhelmed with positive emotions.
I hope you’ll listen to my advice because, trust me, there is always someone who cares for you, even if you aren’t aware of it.
Right now, I care for you, and I’m begging you to never forget that you are worthy of a happy life. You deserve to be happy, and I know you will be.