Inner beauty is a term you’ve probably heard on a million different occasions, secretly wondering what exactly people mean by it.
You know how they say that true beauty lies in the eye of the beholder, so it’s only natural to be curious about inner beauty versus outer beauty and the actual importance (or lack thereof) of physical appearance.
Skeptics might say that it’s easy for beautiful people to say it’s the inner beauty that counts because they’ve got their outer appearances so they can say whatever they want; it doesn’t hold much merit coming from them.
Real beauty has been an object of discussions for many decades. How does one judge their own self and is true beauty really only skin deep despite what many might say?
What is women’s approach to inner beauty really like and has plastic surgery been the detriment of an average looking woman’s self-esteem?
Has inner self been neglected so much that we as human beings glorify outer beauty as if it’s an accomplishment?
Body image and physical beauty have been in the center stage of all magazines and TV shows, and are always lauded as the main factor in attracting the opposite sex.
But are beautiful things truly what trumps a beautiful soul?
Is lust at first sight destroying the very essence of what should be celebrated (inner beauty) but rarely is?
Having a voluptuous body used to be celebrated and admired (just think of Marilyn Monroe and the way her curvaceous figure defied beauty standards and attracted millions of people around the globe), but unfortunately, that ship has sailed.
Now, that type of body is considered unideal and unworthy of the same attention.
Sadly, the word “beauty” doesn’t encompass what it should: a generous heart, selfless personality, and kind soul.
It doesn’t immediately make you think of a generous, humble person, but rather a bombastic supermodel or actress with a certain type of body and face that men lust after.
Where did it all go wrong? How have virtuous ideals gone out of style and when has outer beauty started a revolution, crushing young people’s self-esteem one unattainable image at a time?
Dissecting Inner Beauty
In the era of various TV shows that encourage plastic surgery and unnecessary “improvements” to one’s physical appearance, it’s difficult (if not nearly impossible) to remain confident in your own skin, just the way you naturally are.
Judging by the way the media and celebrities accentuate outer beauty over inner beauty, it’s no wonder so many of today’s youth are struggling with depression, anxiety, and negative thoughts.
Everywhere around them, toxic ideals are plastered all over the news, billboards with unattainably thin supermodels splashed just about on every corner with their edited skin glorified and impossibly thin waist in the center spot, making all those ”regular” looking human beings feel unworthy, unpretty, and unwanted.
But it’s time to put an end to putting so much pressure on people (especially young girls) to look a certain way when that’s the wrong message to send out.
Beauty isn’t skin deep. One’s smooth skin, perfect nose, and perky derriere aren’t what makes them superior to others.
Their kindness and empathy are what makes them stand apart from the rest. Their ability to resist the urge to compare and rather remain humble yet confident in what they can bring to the table.
The true beauty is in the way one’s soul handles life’s hurdles and in one’s good heart, despite having been hurt beyond necessary measure.
It’s in the way one selflessly gives out love and shares and promotes kindness, knowing very well there’s nothing to gain.
Beautiful people are more than capable of possessing inner beauty as well, even though not all of them can proudly and truthfully claim it.
When you’ve got outer appearances working in your favor, your self-belief takes a severe hit, as you tend to estimate your worth by the way you look on the outside.
That way, your self-worth suffers and vanity rises, which makes for a dangerous combination of ideals where the outer beauty and physical appearance prevail.
And there’s no one to blame for that but the media nowadays who persistently promote vanity and materialistic values as opposed to real beauty (kindness, selflessness, willingness to sacrifice one’s own happiness for the sake of someone else’s).
As a woman in this new modern era of fallen ideals, I often stumble upon women of different shapes and sizes and outer appearances that vary from those with that obvious type of outer beauty to those with that inner beauty that simply radiates at first sight of them.
And do you know what I’ve come to realize?
Drop-dead-gorgeous people are much more unhappy on the inside (but they’ll never let it show) and those who don’t necessarily resemble a runway supermodel are much more tranquil and at peace with their own self.
And this is why I think that is. Growing up with mesmerizing physical features and a physical appearance that clearly brings certain advantages (sad but true), you get used to a certain type of treatment.
People don’t see you as a person, but rather as a gorgeous, shiny thing to feast their eyes on and indulge their teenage fantasies while being in your presence.
They don’t try to dig deeper and see what lies beneath your gorgeous exterior. They don’t see your inner beauty because they’re too mesmerized by what’s on the outside.
And for a while, it’s flattering – enjoyable even. But as time goes by and you start seeing that beauty isn’t what it’s all about, it starts getting tiring only being judged by your looks.
What you carry in your soul is neglected, what you have to offer intellectually goes to oblivion and your kind manners are brushed off because who cares about all that since you’re too gorgeous to be a decent human being?
Sadly, that’s the world we’re living in. Beautiful people carry weight not visible to the naked eye.
Physical appearance brings you materialistic perks that are flattering for some time, but eventually, you notice an almost palpable emotional toll that eats away at you.
And if by chance, you’re one of those people who seek a higher purpose and want to experience a more fulfilled life that’s based on actual values, I can help you get that.
Here I’m going to discuss the pathway to inner beauty and how to attain that inner peace by accepting, attaining, and loving the true beauty from within.
Being confident in your physical appearance while holding yourself to a higher moral standard is where true happiness lies.
The Journey To Inner Beauty
After having been shaken by what I’ve seen in my midst and everywhere around the globe, I’ve decided to dig a little deeper and conduct some research into what I believe beauty should be all about.
I’ve talked to many people (family, friends, co-workers, and many more) about what they consider inner beauty to be and their personal thoughts and experiences with the inner beauty versus outer beauty propaganda.
My goal was to find out whether I’m right to think that vanity can be helped and if inner beauty could, in fact, be achieved by practicing certain steps that I’ll describe below.
I was pleased to discover that my personal views mostly were in sync with what I’ve discovered and that inner beauty is a journey that is easily attainable and well worth it.
To those who have let their guard down and let themselves be vulnerable and honest about true values, the importance of moral ground and physical appearance ended up achieving a higher sense of understanding their own self.
Physical appearance can only take you so far. Here’s how you can find your happiness by finding the real beauty within and restore your view of yourself, no matter your outer appearance.
1. Focus on a healthy attitude toward your body
I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve had an extremely unhealthy (toxic even) relationship with my body for many years.
Growing up, I was always surrounded by girls with thin waists, perfect faces and the thickest hair you’ve ever seen. It was almost unfair.
It was a struggle being around them every day because I was reminded on a daily basis that I wasn’t tall enough, thin enough, or good-looking enough, especially when it came to the opposite sex.
I wouldn’t stand a chance. My self-worth was at an all-time low and I despised my body, even though in hindsight, I looked perfectly normal (whatever that is).
But my point is, don’t let other people affect your relationship with your own body.
Everybody has inner struggles you’re not privy to and it’s unfair to yourself to put your mind through such heartbreak over not looking a certain way.
Embrace your body the way it is. Stop comparing yourself with other people and start appreciating what mother nature gave you.
Nobody’s perfect! Nobody has the upper hand on you unless you allow them to.
Start seeing yourself the way others see you and realize that your body is not what you should base your worth on, it’s your intellect, your kindness, and your humility!
Nurture a healthy new attitude toward your body and love yourself because that’s where your journey to inner beauty starts.
See also: 8 Simple Signs Of True Love From A Woman
2. Smile at yourself when you look in the mirror
If you’re anything like me (or like any other girl out there) you’re likely to check yourself in the mirror only to see if that annoying blemish has finally disappeared or if your hair is a mess and how to fix it.
You worry that your skin-care routine is failing you and you’re annoyed at yourself.
You rarely put on a smile while checking your reflection because you’re always preoccupied with something negative on your hair/face/head, which immediately brings out negative emotions and diminishes your self-worth.
And guess what? That’s one step toward a total disaster if you keep doing that to yourself.
I’m here to shift you back to a healthier path where your outer appearances don’t carry such importance and looking at yourself doesn’t give you anxiety.
It’s so easy to change that by simply smiling instead of automatically frowning upon seeing yourself in the mirror.
Don’t give yourself such a hard time over a zit and give yourself a smile to help set your intention for the day.
You’re here, you’re healthy, and you’re alive. I’m sure you look more than fine, so spend less time worrying about blemishes and more time smiling at yourself.
It’s a start to a happy, healthy relationship with your own self.
3. Say goodbye to negativity
The more you nurture a self-loathing relationship with yourself, the more likely it is to become a habit that will eventually become too difficult to kick.
So nip it in the bud and eliminate any traces of negativity.
Treat yourself the way you want to be treated. It’s been scientifically proven that the more you develop a negative attitude toward yourself, the more likely you are to implement those same twisted values on your future offspring.
If you wish to become a parent one day, it’s necessary to eliminate negativity and embrace positivity toward yourself.
That’s what your child will live with one day, and you teach them how to love themselves by loving your own self first!
Don’t let media dictate your self-worth. Don’t let heavily edited supermodels on glossy covers inflict insecurity and self-loathing toward yourself.
Eliminate negative thoughts about body image and physical beauty and surround yourself with positive people and real values.
Your inner self shines way brighter than your physical appearance. The trick is to get to that happy place and never let it be outshined by false values again.
4. Dedicate yourself to things that awaken your inner joy
One way to get closer to finding (and maintaining) that inner beauty is by focusing less attention on actively seeking it and more attention to your interests that bring you joy and fulfillment!
By constantly being focused on one particular thing, you strain your mind and keep yourself from organically being happy.
Instead of pursuing happiness by thinking you’ll find it here or there, actually do the things that you love and it’ll come to you.
Have you neglected the all-girl choir that brought you so much joy? Are you an avid piano player who has put off enjoying this fulfilling hobby while in pursuit of happiness?
Whatever it is that makes your heart sing, do it right now! Do what makes you happy. No thinking, no reservations, and no judging. Rewire your brain and start practicing what you preach.
This will instill newfound confidence in you and give you that morale boost and clear vision of what TRULY matters.
And precisely that is what will bring you another step closer to your inner beauty.
Finding those little things that push you forward will make you appreciate all that truly matters and forget about those vain ideals that you’ve let overpower your mind for far too long.
5. Nourish those deep, inspiring friendships
Let me tell you a little secret. Having the right people around you makes ALL the difference in your life.
Surrounding yourself with people who lift you up, inspire you, encourage you, and never leave your side is what propels you to become the happiest version of yourself.
That’s a fact. Want to find that inner beauty? Desperate to get to that happy place where you’re not overcome with vanity, jealousy, insecurity, and self-doubt?
Get yourself some friends who’ll support you through thick and thin and you’ll be just fine – that’s a promise.
For too long, I had surrounded myself with people who exasperated me.
For too long, I’d been focused on making those same, toxic people happy by ignoring and neglecting who I really was in order to fit into their idea of me (the person they needed and expected me to be).
It was torture. I lost myself in the process and spent many a night crying myself to sleep. Only after discarding them from my life was I finally able to uncover the true beauty within. Only now can I appreciate that what’s inside really matters.
Having been around the wrong people made me question everything. But now, I know what matters.
I know which values carry the biggest significance (and it sure isn’t outer beauty and fitting in with the wrong people). Can you say the same for yourself?
6. Stop following trends and start setting your own
Following in the footsteps of others is never going to make you feel as happy on the inside as you wish it would.
Paving your own way is the only thing that will awaken your inner joy and make you feel free of outside judgment and high expectations.
People follow trends in order to fit in with the crowd. But what’s so alluring about being exactly the same as everyone around you?
Where is the originality in that? What’s the point in being the exact same replica of already existing human beings?
Find the thing that YOU find inspiring and follow your dream. Wear what makes you feel comfortable.
Don’t wear makeup if you’re only doing it to fit in, or wear as much of it as you want if that’s what makes you happy.
You do you! Gather your fellow women and start making a change. Sure, it’s a small change world-wise, but an extremely significant one for you. And isn’t that enough?
Finding your own self in the sea of toxic ideals and embracing your inner beauty despite being told that what’s on the inside is what matters.
THAT is being true to yourself and paving your own way. And that is the only way to finding your place in the world without sacrificing who you are in the process.
7. Stop judging and start appreciating
We’ve all been guilty of judging others based on their physical appearance at some point in our life. It’s called being human.
After all, TV shows, social media, and celebrities all impose such vain standards that it’s become increasingly difficult remaining immune to them and preserving a judge-free zone.
But if you aspire to achieve inner beauty, you’re going to have to let go of your need to judge and embrace your selfless side in order to appreciate what matters and ignore what collides with your newfound views on beauty.
Don’t judge others for not being able to comprehend where you’re coming from. Resist the urge to offer unsolicited opinion on a matter that doesn’t concern you.
Live your own life and do it by your own rules. But always be mindful of the importance of appreciation and humility. Not everyone will get what you’re all about, but they don’t have to.
As long as you keep paving your path and seeking true values in life, your mission in this world will be accomplished.
Worry about your own self and let go of the things you cannot change. It all starts on the inside.
Embracing The Change
Successfully finding inner beauty is a journey full of self-discovery and experiences that will take you for a spin and leave you forever changed.
But if this change is something you’re ready to tackle, this is going to be an adventure of a lifetime.
Be the change you want to see in the world. Discard the negativity and forego distorted illusions of an outer beauty that is only skin deep.
Let that be a thing of the past. Physical appearances aren’t accomplishments worthy of being celebrated.
Having supremely good-looking attributes isn’t a value to be appreciated.
Kindness and forgiveness are. Ability to break away from the masses and pave your own path is.
Let go of the person everyone is telling you to be and find that inner beauty that will guide to a new, happier reality.
Are you ready to make a change and start living authentically?