Mi sto costringendo ad accettare che tra noi sia davvero finita

Chiamami patetica e idealista, ma dal primo momento in cui ti ho visto, ero convinta che saresti stato l'uomo accanto al quale avrei passato la mia vita.

I thought you’d be the person to hold my hand even when I grew old. That you’d be the person I’d start a family with and the man who would be the father of my children.

I was sure that our love story wouldn’t be ordinary and that it would be something which would last a lifetime.

Pensavo che niente e nessuno avrebbe mai potuto frapporsi tra noi e che l'amore avrebbe sconfitto tutto ciò che lo ostacolava.

Don’t get me wrong—I never thought it would be perfect.

I was aware of the fact that we’d have some rough times. I knew we’d argue and that we wouldn’t get along about everything.

But somehow, I was always convinced we’d surpass all of this.

In qualche modo, sono sempre stata convinta che il nostro amore sarebbe stato più forte di tutti gli ostacoli e le sfide che la vita ci ha posto davanti.

But I guess I couldn’t have been more wrong. And I guess I was the only one who thought this way.

Because you wouldn’t have left me the way you did if you were sure of our love the way I was. And I know it has been a while since you and I were together.

E la mia ragione continua a dirmi che tu won’t come back e che le cose tra noi non saranno mai più come prima.

Ma il mio cuore si rifiuta ancora di accettarlo. E spera ancora, contro ogni previsione. Mi rifiuto ancora di accettare davvero che sia finita.

I am still forcing myself to accept that our love story has come to its end. And that it wasn’t a lieto fine.

I still have to remind myself that I don’t have a right to call you whenever I feel like it. That I can’t share every single moment of my day with you.

Che non sei più la prima persona con cui posso condividere tutto ciò che mi è successo, sia bello che brutto.

Sto ancora crescendo per capire che siete non è la mia persona per sempre and that you are not the person I’ll share my life with.

That all of our future goals, plans and dreams will never come true. That we’ll never accomplish all of the things we talked about.

That we’ll never visit all the places we wanted to visit and that we’ll never do everything we planned to do.

That I’ll never be your wife or the mother of your children.

That I won’t spend every morning of every day of my life waking up next to you. That I will never fall asleep in your arms again.

That I’ll never again hear your heartbeat.

That I’ll never kiss you and that you’ll never hold me in your arms. That I’ll never spend hours watching you sleep and listening to you breathe peacefully.

That I’ll never again see your face on my doorstep, waiting for me to come home. That I’ll never see a text or a missed call from you on my phone screen.

I even can’t believe that you’ll never annoy me anymore. That we’ll never argue over silly little things.

That you’ll never make me angry the only way you knew how to. That I’ll never fight with you and that we’ll never again have makeup sex.

Mi sto costringendo ad accettare che un giorno, in futuro, un nuovo uomo entrerà a far parte della mia vita.

That someday, I’ll be kissing another’s lips and that I’ll be waking up next to someone else.

I am still forcing myself to understand that someday, you’ll be just a distant memory which I’ll hardly remember.

That it’s about time for me to leave you in the past. That it’s time for me to finally get over you and to let go of everything that’s reminding me of you.

That it’s about time for me to stop holding on to the past and to focus on my present and future.

Mi sto ancora forzando a non amarti. E mi sto ancora forzando ad andare avanti con la mia vita.