Saprò che il mio cuore è guarito quando ti perdonerò per tutto ciò che mi hai fatto

Probabilmente è una cosa che non dovrei dirvi dopo tutto quello che è successo.

Qualcosa che dovrei tenere per me come un segreto, assicurandomi che tu non lo scopra mai.

After all, you’re my toxic ex – the one who broke my heart to pieces and the one who caused me more pain than I thought I could handle.

So, the normal thing for me to do would be to pretend that I am completely indifferent and that I’ve moved on from you a while ago.

Ci si aspetta da me che finga di essere più felice che mai e che tu non sia altro che un lontano ricordo.

Secondo tutte le regole, dovrei mantenere il mio ego intatto e non umiliarmi ulteriormente rivolgendomi a lei.

Nevertheless, knowing me, I’ll be honest, as I’ve always been, and I’ll tell you exactly what’s been on my mind all this time.

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t expect it to make a difference – I just want you to know how much harm you’ve done.

Vedi, la verità è che penso ancora a te. Esisti ancora in fondo alla mia mente; mi perseguiti ancora.

However, this doesn’t mean I miss you.

It doesn’t mean that I fall asleep every night wishing for all our happy times to come back, nor that I wish for you to return into my life.

This doesn’t mean that I would ever get back together with you or that I picture us together.

It’s just that I am aware that I am not healed yet. I did get over you, but I’ve never gotten over everything you did to me.

Sì, dopo tutto questo tempo mi risento ancora di te.

Maybe I should be ashamed for being so weak and for allowing your actions to still have such a huge impact on me, but I just can’t help but being consumed by this resentment that has been eating me alive to this day.

As much as I try, I can’t let go of grudges, of the bitterness and negativity you left behind.

Even though I forgave you for abandoning me when I needed you the most, I can’t force myself to forget about all the backstabbing, about the betrayal, about the abuse.

I can’t seem to forget all the tears, all the sleepless nights, all the insults, all the other women… Nor can I forgive you for any of this.

Nevertheless, a day will come when I’ll let go of all the resentment.

A day when I won’t wish the worst for you. A day when I’ll stop seeking vendetta.

A day will come when I’ll finally be at peace with myself and with everything you did to me.

When I’ll understand that I shouldn’t give you any more credit for allowing you to affect me anymore.

There will come a time when I’ll get rid of all the insecurities and self-doubts you caused me to feel.

When I’ll start believing in love once again and when I’ll finally tear down the walls I had to build because of you.

A time when I’ll let this guard down and when I’ll go back to being the same girl I was before you stormed through my life.

Un tempo in cui la donna che sono diventata dopo tutti i danni che hai causato non ci sarà più.

Ho fede che tutte le mie ferite guariranno e che la mia anima si riprenderà.

That sometime in the future, my heart will be clear from all this hate I still feel for you and that I’ll finally free myself from the emotional baggage you left behind.

Even though I’m consumed by resentment now, I believe that one day, I’ll figure out how to accept the apology I never got.

That one day, I’ll perdonarti per tutto quello che mi hai fatto e smetterai di esistere nella mia mente e nel mio cuore.

When that happens, I’ll know that I’m completely recovered.

I’ll know that I’ve gotten over you and that I’ve finally moved on.

I’ll know that I’ve closed this chapter of my life and that I’ve left you in the past, where you belong.

When that happens, I’ll know that I’m ready for the love I deserve.