Real-life is messy. And as much as we all strive to lead a perfect life, there will always be good days, as well as the bad ones.
You cannot escape the messiness of life no matter how much of a perfectionist you are (trust me, I’ve tried). It’s time to embrace, accept and learn to love the total mess your life can be at times. Why?
Because if you keep striving for perfection, you’re never going to be happy. If you keep looking for that missing piece instead of living your messy life to the fullest, happiness is going to pass you by.
Let go of your need to be in control and know when to say goodbye to those unattainable goals that are making you feel this way.
Your obsession with perfection is only going to deteriorate your well-being and set you up for inevitable failure.
Instead, hear me out when I tell you that embracing life’s messiness is the most gracious thing you can do for yourself. And here’s why!
Obsessing over unattainable perfection makes you lose sight of yourself
Who were you before your need for perfection overcame you and started being your guide through life?
What were you all about? Did you implement self-care daily and was your life messy but totally worth it?
Remind yourself of this person! Remind yourself of all the hard work you put into everything that you do. You’re more than your need for perfection.
You’re more than that one unattainable goal that’s been bugging you for years.
You are perfect exactly the way you are. There is nothing missing from your life but a little reality check. You don’t need to be perfect to be amazing.
You don’t have to keep pushing yourself beyond your limits to the point of forgetting to just sit back and enjoy life.
Give yourself a break with everything you’ve done and all you’ve been through. You work hard, take care of your loved ones, put real food on the table and keep a tidy home.
So what if it gets messy sometimes? That’s a sign you’re alive. Fully embrace every part of yourself and love every single flaw that makes you unique.
Trying to be someone you’re not is messy work. Be your unapologetic, authentic self and remind yourself to enjoy the little things.
The voice telling you that you need to be perfect doesn’t really matter
Perfection is a plague that has overcome our society. The media keeps promoting unhealthy body images and seemingly perfect lives that are actually far from it.
Nobody has it all. Nobody is fully satisfied with every aspect of their life without one single regret. But nobody is going to write about that.
Nobody will tell you that it’s totally okay to be average but happy.
Nobody is going to tell you that leading tidy lives will ultimately keep you wondering what could’ve been if you weren’t so focused on the next thing.
What I’m trying to say is this: That voice that keeps telling you to keep reaching for more and to never settle for less doesn’t carry any significance.
It’s just what the outside world has instilled in you. It’s not real.
It’s countless hours spent looking at Victoria’s Secret supermodels. It’s bingeing TV shows filled with gorgeous girls who seemingly have it all.
It’s your best friend whose body looks smashing no matter how much she eats and her face that could be compared to those of the biggest beauties of today.
But you need to stop letting these things affect your mindset. Life is messy. People are messy. Even the most put-together people have things that trouble them deep down.
Stop putting unnecessary pressure on yourself and instead of looking at bikini supermodels, turn on Harry Potter and see what life is really all about.
Friendship, overcoming obstacles with the help of your nearest and dearest and being happy just the way you are. Don’t let social media and Facebook groups tell you differently.
Happy people are too pleased with their lives to post about it online. Think about that for a second.
Your flaws and imperfections are what’s so awesome about you
Stop picking at your flaws. Stop thinking that people only see you superficially. You are beyond that. In fact, the things you hate about yourself are what others are most likely drawn to!
Your countless freckles, your loud personality, your say-it-like-it-is approach and your complete openness make you so special.
You might think that these make you less awesome but it’s the opposite. These things make you stand out from the rest.
Every single thing you yearn to change is what someone loves about you. We are our own worst critic and that’s the understatement of the century.
Here’s what I suggest you do. Whenever you start feeling like you’re not enough or like your life is anywhere but where you want it to be, put yourself in your best friend’s shoes.
What would she/he tell you if they were with you right now? And be honest with yourself. You know that they would tell you’re so much more than that dream you still haven’t achieved.
They’d tell you that your flaws are actually cute, peculiar qualities that people find surprisingly adorable. They would never let you be so hard on yourself.
And they’d be right. Everything we want to change about ourself is exactly what makes us so unique. Why would you want to be like someone else anyway?
It’s better to stand out with your uniqueness than to be bland and go with the crowd. You’re too awesome for that anyway.
Perfection leaves zero room for growth
Think about it. The thing you so deeply yearn for is a stagnant place. There is nowhere to go but down. Once you reach perfection, where can you go next?
Everything that follows will be a massive let-down because in that perfect bubble, there is no room left for you to grow, change and achieve more than you ever could’ve hoped for.
There are no possibilities left. So when you really give this some thought, is it really that alluring?
By making mistakes and embracing the notion that life is messy, you are constantly giving yourself opportunities to learn and better yourself through experience.
It’s what grounds you, shapes you and ultimately makes you who you are. Being imperfect means always striving for more but never to the point of being obsessed with something as unattainable as perfection.
Nurture an environment that allows you to be who you are, with no crazy expectations, limitations or constraints.
For the first time ever, try to see the beauty that lies in all the messiness that’s ahead. Yes, you’ll make mistakes and no, life won’t always be a breeze but that’s okay.
When you go through life with the right, realistic mindset, you’ll see the beauty that lies everywhere around you. Your messy kitchen counter means you’re not hungry.
Your untidy living room means that people live there freely and happily. Your job that you’re not sure you want to keep means that you’ll likely push yourself to find something that fulfills you.
All of these things bring endless possibilities. It’s all about how you choose to see it. Embrace your messy life; you only get one chance at it.
Embracing life’s messiness means you’re in control of your happiness
This is all about taking care of yourself and making sure you are living a life according to your expectations.
You don’t have to please anyone else but your own self. You don’t have to let anyone tell you how to live your life because it’s none of their business!
Don’t let them tell you that you’re not enough. Don’t let them make you feel less worthy because you still haven’t got it all figured out. It’s your life, your rules and your own pace.
Some people know who they are and what they want at 20 and for some, it takes decades to truly figure it all out. So what?
Life is a marathon, not a sprint. Take your time. Just because things are a bit messy now, it doesn’t mean it’ll be that way forever!
Who gets to tell you how to be happy? Nobody but you. Because you’re the only one who knows what soothes your soul.
You’re the only one who knows what makes your heart sing. So what if you’re still not there? One day, you’ll be just as happy (if not happier) as you wish you were right now.
Maybe you’re currently struggling. Maybe you’ve swerved off the path you want to be taking. Don’t worry about it. We all get lost sometimes not knowing what to do with our life. It’s not the end of the world.
Trust me; when I pictured my life at my current age, I definitely didn’t think things would be the way they are. But I’m still happy.
It doesn’t matter that I had a different vision for where I’d be today. Life had other plans and I’m totally okay with that. Just because you think something will make you happy, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it will.
Ten years ago, I probably would have been shocked and disappointed if I had known that most of the things I’d envisioned for myself wouldn’t have panned out. But today, I’m fulfilled just the way that I am.
Life has a funny way of working itself out the way you never dreamed that it would. Just you wait.
It helps you connect with your true self
You have to be honest with yourself; if you’re not, what’s the point? You’re never going to be truly happy. You’re never going to be able to be in touch with your feelings.
But embracing the fact that yeah, life is messy, but it doesn’t mean that you’re doing it wrong will fuel you to keep being true to who you are.
Real life isn’t all roses and butterflies. It’s every struggle, failure and sadness in-between. It’s every uncomfortable moment that makes you see who your real friends are.
It’s every tear you spilled over someone who didn’t deserve you. It’s giving yourself a break after a long, hard day and choosing not to clean the house because you just don’t have the energy.
That’s life. That’s what’s real. Not pretending to be anything more or less than what you are.
When you’re able to embrace it and be okay with every single part of life, even the most uncomfortable parts, you’ll be your best self.
You’re no good to anyone (especially to yourself) if you keep forcing yourself to be someone you’re not. It’ll keep you perpetually jaded, unfulfilled and miserable.
Keep your head high and your chin up. Good things are coming. But you have to embrace everything that happens in-between too.
That’s life and that’s the only way to live it. Know that being true to yourself is the only way to go. And if there’s anyone in your life making you feel bad about it, discard them.
Your messy emotions will bring you unexpected revelations
How many times have you thought to yourself that the only way to be seen as beautiful, worthy and lovable is by putting on a mask and denying the true essence of who you are?
How many times have you let yourself believe that in order to live up to someone’s expectations you had to tame some part of yourself?
True acceptance comes from being able to recognize that unexpected things actually bring you infinite wisdom.
Every single thing that made you feel uneasy and uncomfortable also made you realize so much.
For example, that thing you recently went through; you never would’ve thought that you’d be able to do it, right?
And look at you now, as if it never happened. That’s what usually happens with unexpected, messy hurdles. They bring you new realizations that are inspiring and encouraging.
Every time you think that something will mentally destroy you, it ends up making you stronger, smarter and more perseverant.
That’s because until you’re in a situation that demands you to do things you never thought you could, you never really know how capable you are.
So embrace your messy emotions. Embrace that rocky path. You have to learn to appreciate every single thing you go through because that’s what makes you so strong in the end.
Life is messy and perfection isn’t real. Whoever tells you differently lives in a bubble that’s about to burst.
Let go of your need to censor and control your emotions. Instead, let them rule you and see how better you’ll be for it. The good days are right now. Learn to see them and cherish them.
Ultimately, accepting life’s messiness feels all kinds of freeing!
As I’ve already established, nobody in this world has it all. Not one person leads a perfect life filled with sunshine and rainbows. So why do you keep expecting to get to a place that doesn’t exist?
Embrace your life just the way that it is. Messy, unpredictable, full of unexpected surprises but authentic and real!
You’re not a robot. Things won’t always automatically be great but that’s okay!
Messiness and mistakes are tools that free you from your incessant need to get everything right. And it feels damn good once you learn to accept it.
So what if things are a bit confusing right now? So what if you’re stuck in a job you don’t like or in a city you want to escape? It’s not going to last forever.
Life has this miraculous way of working itself out in the most unexpected ways. Things rarely pan out exactly the way you envisioned they would. But that’s the beauty of life!
You never really know what you’re getting and it keeps you on your toes every single day. Isn’t that the best way to live?