What is the perfect timing to go back out there in the dating pool? What are the things you should achieve before finding a boyfriend?
These are the questions every woman asks herself at one point in her life, especially if she’s been single for a long period of time.
Well, we’re here to give you all the answers you need.
Here are 10 crucial life goals you should do your best to accomplish before changing your relationship status.
1. Stay single until you know what you want
Before entering a healthy relationship, first you have to know who and what you want. And I’m not talking about romance here only.
It’s important for you to realize the direction in which you want your life to be headed.
You don’t have to necessarily achieve all of your life goals overnight but you should at least have a list of the things you would like to accomplish.
The same goes for knowing who you want.
What is the type of man you want by your side?
What kind of relationship do you aspire to have?
What are your biggest deal-breakers and standards?
Of course, I’m not saying that you will ever find a man who will have everything from your list but it is important to know what you’re looking for if you hope to ever find it.
2. Stay single until you become yourself
Stay single until you know who you are and most importantly—until you become okay with that.
Build your own personality, stop comparing yourself to the rest of the world, be proud of your uniqueness and don’t be a people pleaser who hides her real character to become more likable to others.
Remember—you’re not a child and the last thing you want is for your potential boyfriend to raise you and try to shape you the way he wants.
You don’t need any man changing the essence of who you are and turning you into a completely different person who fits his standards.
And that is exactly what will happen if you enter a relationship before fully becoming yourself.
That’s what will happen if you don’t finish your own blooming process and if you don’t grow up completely.
3. Stay single until you let go of the past
There is absolutely no point in getting yourself in any kind of romance if you still have some unresolved issues from the past.
A rebound relationship will only make you feel worse.
Therefore, I’m begging you to stay single until you manage all of your emotional baggage in the healthiest way possible.
Yes, your past relationships are a part of you and they helped shape you into the woman you are today but that doesn’t mean that you should enter a new romance carrying all of your traumas with you.
Stay single if you still have feelings for your ex and if you’re dealing with strong insecurities or fears.
Stay single until you let go of the past and until you’re truly ready to move on.
Please, don’t let anyone tell you that you are taking too long to recover and that you should have found someone new already.
Remember that we all heal at a different pace so don’t beat yourself up if you need some more time.
4. Stay single until you become self-aware
Becoming self-aware means being able to see yourself as objectively as possible.
It means being aware of your qualities, flaws, desires, hopes and imperfections.
What are the things you like doing? How do you enjoy spending your time?
Do you have defined tastes in music, movies, literature and art? What are your preferences in life?
Who are you? This is the question you should be able to answer outside of your relationship, without waiting for a man to define you.
Most importantly—it means knowing your self-value and not allowing anyone to question it.
Being self-aware is also important when it comes to your love history. What are your toxic traits?
What are the dating patterns you’re not so proud of and you’d like to change?
What are the mistakes you keep on repeating but can’t seem to get rid of? Stay single until you get answers to all of these questions.
Do some self-analysis and self-introspection and do your best to observe yourself as a realistic bystander.
Trust me—you’ll learn a lot and you’ll discover some parts of your character you didn’t even know existed.
5. Stay single until you’re not afraid to be single
If you consider entering a new relationship just because you’re tired of your single life—don’t.
More importantly, don’t do so if you’re scared that you’ll end up forever alone and that you’ll never find your forever person.
Please, stay single until being single doesn’t feel so scary.
Don’t go around looking for a potential boyfriend just because all your friends found their special man.
Don’t do it because you’re ashamed of never having a plus-one or because you feel it’s about time for you to find a serious relationship.
Don’t settle for less and lower your standards just because you’re afraid that your biological clock is ticking or because you’ve become obsessed with the thought that you won’t find a man to grow old next to.
Instead, before getting yourself into a relationship, learn to enjoy your single life to the max.
Use all of its benefits and rock at being single!
Stay single until you stop searching for love and until you realize that it will come to you when you least expect it and when it’s meant to be.
6. Stay single until you become financially self-sufficient
One of the worst things any woman can do to herself is to become financially dependent on her boyfriend or husband.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m not saying that every guy out there will use this against you the first time you have an argument but that’s a risk you shouldn’t be taking.
After all, you’re a mature, healthy adult who is perfectly capable of earning her own money and you don’t need anyone providing for you.
No, this doesn’t mean that you have to be filthy rich before entering a relationship. However, it would be great if you are financially self-sufficient first.
You see, no matter how much you love a guy and how strong your romance might seem in the beginning, the harsh truth is that you never know how long it will last and nor can you even be certain if things will end badly sometime in the future.
So, it’s best to avoid a situation in which you’re remaining in a toxic relationship just because you’re financially dependent on your partner and have nowhere to go.
7. Stay single until you start looking for an equal partner
When you’re looking for a boyfriend, don’t expect to find a parent you’ve been missing your whole life, an older brother you never had, a life coach or a savior.
Instead, start looking for an equal partner who will go through life by your side, shoulder to shoulder next to you.
Don’t go searching for a purpose or for someone to magically resolve all of your problems.
You don’t need a guardian angel, nor a man who will snap his fingers and heal your broken heart just by appearing in your life.
8. Stay single until you become happy on your own
The most crucial thing every girl in the world needs to remember is that a relationship can’t make you happy.
Yes, it can make you feel better, it can improve your life but if you’re not in a good place with yourself, it won’t make a huge difference.
You see, if you’re not happy single, you won’t be happy taken. So, please stay single until you become happy on your own.
Stay single until you realize that there won’t come a man with a magic wand into your life who will wipe away all of your tears and erase all of your problems, traumas or issues.
A man who will kill all of your deeply-rooted insecurities or who will make you love yourself more.
Yes, the right guy will help you with all of this. However, you’re the only creator of your own happiness and the key is in your hands.
You’re in charge and you can’t expect anyone else to take the wheel.
9. Stay single until you start loving yourself first
There is one thing you need to remember above everything else—the relationship you have with yourself is more important than any other, including romantic ones.
You can be crazy over a man, you can care for him from the depths of your heart but you’ll never have a happy love life until you learn the importance of putting and loving yourself first.
Please, don’t get yourself involved in any relationship until you build a healthy relationship with your inner self.
Stay single until you realize that you’re more than enough, until you build your self-confidence, until you become sure about yourself and your abilities and until you become selfish enough to prioritize your own needs in front of everyone else’s.
You see, no man will appreciate, respect or love you the way you deserve until you do so yourself.
You need to show him that you’re very much aware of your own worth and that nothing he says or does can impact your self-image.
10. Stay single until you’re ready for a relationship
Finally, stay single until you feel ready to share your life with someone else.
Don’t go around chasing a relationship if you feel pressured by the people in your surroundings, if you’re doing it because you think it’s how things should be or if you simply prefer to not be alone now.
Don’t listen to anyone or anything besides your gut and trust me—things will work themselves out.
