This year wasn’t everything that I expected. It was a year in which I actually learned a lot of things but in a harsh way. It was a year of losing my loved ones, secrets revealing themselves, and seeing people around me taking off their masks and revealing their real faces.
During this year, I learned that I can rely only on myself. I learned that no matter how many times everybody tells me they will be there forever, they will leave, making excuses as soon as things get bad.
I learned that I shouldn’t give too much of myself to the people who
don’t deserve it and that words mean nothing if actions are different.
I learned that family doesn’t necessarily mean safety and that the ones who swore they will always protect me left with the first bump on the road.
This was a year where I learned a lot about myself. I learned to control my emotions, to control the way I react and to embrace every change like it was the best thing that is happening to me.
During this year, I completely changed, but I am totally okay with it.
I had the bad luck to lose people who I thought were my best friends. But in fact, they were with me just because of some personal interest. They were with me because I was convenient for them. And nothing more. So losing them was a bad thing, but when I take a closer look, it is better that I saw their real faces in time.
This year taught me that when someone says they love me, it doesn’t always mean it will last forever. I learned that love is all about how much effort you are willing to make for someone. It is how much you are willing to give to them without asking for anything in return. I learned that I shouldn’t push things, especially when it comes to love. And that was the most important thing I learned so far.
This year also taught me that the only person I should trust is actually myself. Because I trusted so many individuals in my life, and they all took advantage of me. They disappointed me by taking me for granted and neglecting me. They didn’t see how much I was willing to make an effort for them. They only looked out for themselves.
This year I learned that in life, I can rely only on myself. I learned that every time I fall down I need to get up. I learned I should never give up. Because if I do that, I will be lost completely. I will be just one more woman who gave up on her life. And that is not something I want to do.
I also learned that there will be different phases in life and that it won’t always all be so flawless. There will be hard times, times where I will feel I am losing my mind but that I will get over them if I believe in myself. I learned that life and love isn’t only about one man, and if he doesn’t make me feel happy, then I shouldn’t hold onto him.
I learned that love will come when I least expect it and that it is something I shouldn’t push. It should come to me naturally.
I learned that I don’t need a man to complete me. I don’t need one to be my hero either. I am strong and capable enough to take care of myself. And even when I will be tired to the bone, I will find that bit of power within myself to keep moving. I will never give up, especially not on myself.
This year taught me so many things, and some of them changed my outlook on life completely. I learned that I can survive everything that happens to me on my own and that I don’t need anyone’s help.
And even though more bad than good things happened this year, I am thankful for it. I am thankful because in this way, I learned how to cope with life problems and how to get out of them with a cold head.
This year helped me to grow and to understand myself better. And what is most important, it helped me see that no matter how much I am broken, I can be whole again.
Christine is the author of ‘Staring Into The Eyes Of Anxiety And Depression’, a book that will change the way you fight anxiety and depression.