Unfuckwithable – adj. – when you are a person who is truly at peace with yourself, and nothing anyone says or does bothers you, no negativity or drama can touch you.
When you first hear the definition of the word unfuckwithable, you get the impression that the person described somebody who generally doesn’t give a damn about anything or anyone. But the truth is that the real meaning of the word is far from it.
To be unfuckwithable means to be a person who knows what he or she wants—going out there and making it happen for yourself.
It means to be a person who doesn’t apologize for being unconventional, making mistakes, having to ask one more time or for going after what he or she wants in the first place.
It means making opportunities for yourself without expecting them to fall from the sky. And in today’s world, you really need to be this kind of person—you really do.
You need to be this kind of person because there will be days and weeks and months that are going to be ugly and in which life is going to burden you with so much weight that you just won’t be able to carry it.
Once that happens, you have to know that the secret fix isn’t in saying fuck it or in losing your shit and telling everyone to go to hell.
The secret is in becoming untouchable in the sense that you can rise above any situation; that you are always the bigger person.
The level of your self-esteem must be higher than your insecurities when other people tell you that you are not enough. When you yourself are certain that you are enough, nobody can mess with you; nobody can stop you or redirect you from your path.
However, if you’re not quite sure if you belong to this badass crew, here are 10 signs that you have an unfuckhwithable state of mind:
1. You know your worth
Opinions other people have about you or your life choices are basically irrelevant. You don’t live to please others, at least not anymore.
You don’t live to fit their rules, and they might not like you because of it. The great thing about it is that you couldn’t care less.
They have little or no influence upon what goes on in your life, and they resent it. You made it on your own. You’re free of labels and unburdened by other people’s expectations for you; you are totally free.
The level of your self-love is getting bigger by the day. You know your own worth, and you and it aren’t determined by other people’s opinions of you.
You can’t stand encountering intrusive people, but you still don’t allow yourself to stress about it too much
The only thing that matters to you is that you know who you are, and if someone else doesn’t, well, it’s their problem, not yours.
2. You don’t stress about the things you can’t control, and you focus on the things you can
There are some things you have no power over, and no matter how much you stress about them, it doesn’t change anything. You understand this part of life, so instead of stressing, you choose to let it go.
You can’t control other people’s behavior toward you, but you’re perfectly in charge of giving people a place in your life. How they behave toward you is what determines how close you hold them to your heart.
Instead of losing your mind over the things that are out of your hands, you focus on those you can change. Instead of trying to right all the wrongs, you try not to let those wrongs take over your mind and affect your behavior.
Stressing out over things you can’t control is just a waste of time for you, and you choose instead to spend your time wisely. You don’t allow situations and circumstances to dictate your happiness. Instead, you choose to deal with the fact that nothing can be done about it, and you focus on improving the things you can.
3. You use fear as your fuel
“Replacing fear with courage is one of the key components of being unfuckwithable”
― Vishen Lakhiani, The Code of the Extraordinary Mind: 10 Unconventional Laws to Redefine Your Life and Succeed On Your Own Terms
When it’s scary to jump, that’s exactly when you jump. You’re one of those people who gets that a comfort zone won’t stretch by itself. By just ‘going for it’, you continue to proactively stretch yours.
When things get ugly in life, you don’t run away and hide. You stand up to your fears, and you try to make the best out of every ugly situation. You convert all of your fears into fuel that motivates you to achieve bigger and greater things.
You don’t bow down before life’s challenges—you make those challenges eventually bow down to you. And you never stop fighting for the things you believe in.
You never stop fighting for your dreams, no matter how far away they seem to you at that moment.
4. You don’t seek approval, but you go with your gut instead
You don’t wait for a green light in life for anything. When you see the opportunity, you simply grab it. When you see something is going to make you happy or something is going to make you grow, you don’t wait for somebody to allow you to take it.
You make opportunities for yourself without waiting for others to give you them. You trust yourself more than you trust others because your gut has never failed you so far. And that is one of the reasons why people often get mad at you.
They get frustrated because they can’t influence you, no matter how hard they try. Your determination and your unfuckwithability are simply invincible, and there is no force in the universe that can stop you from doing something if your gut is telling you that it is the right thing to do.
5. You don’t let others use the best of you without giving back their best in return
This is the best part of unfuckwithability. Not letting others use the best of you, feed on your love or give you toxicity. You believe only in the pure things in life, and you aren’t satisfied with mediocrity.
When you give someone all of yourself and they don’t reciprocate, you just stop giving to them, deleting them from your life because they are not worthy of you.
You don’t let other people’s greediness influence your happiness because you have more important things to deal with.
You’re either in or you’re out. There’s no gray area here. And that’s the same thing you expect from others as well. If they are unable to respect that, you simply say to yourself: “Fuck them” and continue living your best life without them.
6. You keep yourself happy and healthy, not allowing the toxicity of others get to you
Being unfuckwithable means believing you matter. You know you’re not just another face in the crowd. You accept the fact that you’re just human and that you’re in charge of your happiness and your life.
You know that you don’t have to apologize for taking care of yourself and for fighting for your own happiness. Therefore, you never apologize for not letting toxic people or any kind of toxicity enter your safe haven.
You take care of your dreams, your wishes and desires, and you take care of other people as well (those who deserve such treatment).
Your circle of people is small, but it consists of the highest quality people whom you trust with all of your heart and soul.
7. You know how to forgive yourself
If you’re an unfuckwithable person, you know the importance of forgiving yourself. You understand that you’re just a human being like everyone else and that it is okay to make mistakes from time to time.
You never hurt anyone on purpose. You never do stupid things on purpose, but when you do either of these by accident, you know that it was just a mistake, and life goes on. You forgive yourself because there’s no point in dwelling on your past and torturing yourself with what ifs.
You believe in the present and in what is happening now. You don’t let yourself feel miserable for something that is irrelevant to your well-being and for something that isn’t a big deal. Instead of constantly worrying about your past, you enjoy the little things in the present because they are all that matter to you.
8. You are unapologetically curious
Being unapologetically curious means not being afraid to ask people about something you’re interested in, no matter how awkward it might be. Instead of constant overthinking things, you simply ask what you want to know without any shame or worrying that they will find it offensive.
You don’t let other people’s words entrap you. When something is fishy to you, you instantly ask them about it honestly, and you expect the same. And if they are not ready to ‘cooperate’, you just leave because life is too short to waste time on bullshit and fake people.
9. You play to your strengths
You are aware of all of your strengths, and you use them wisely to your advantage. Perhaps you are good at persuading other people or negotiating. Perhaps you’re just good with words, and you don’t let anyone impose their ideals on you.
You always think twice before you say anything because you’re aware of the fact that words are your most powerful tool. Playing to your strengths has become a part of you, and sometimes other people cannot help but be jealous of it.
And your reply to them is one of the unfuckwithable sentences that you have as a backup for every ‘special occasion’. You’re always one step ahead of every game which makes it impossible for others to manipulate you.
10. When you want something, you work hard to achieve it
You don’t just wait for everything to be served to you. When you want something, you always make sure to roll up your sleeves and do the work. And you never let anyone tell you that you can’t do something before you’ve even tried.
You believe that you can achieve anything if you just work hard for it and never give up no matter what. And if someone tries to fuck you up on your way to achievement, you just turn on your unfuckwithable button and instantly delete their existence.
When you want something, you devote all of your time to it, and you aren’t satisfied until it is completed. And even if you fail at it, you simply try again, no matter how many times they told you that you should switch to something else.
As an unfuckwithable person, you believe in the beauty of your dreams and in the beauty of turning a blind eye to those who don’t understand it.