This one is for every girl who has ever wanted fairy tale love. I’m sure you’ve heard things like “that doesn’t exist in the real world” or “chivalry is dead”. But I am here today to tell you that what you’ve heard isn’t true.  However, here’s the tricky part: It doesn’t come from a man in the castle and it most definitely does not come from “love at first sight”. True love will only be found within yourself.

Everyone goes through the phase in life where they feel lost or like something is missing. Hell, you may even still be going through that phase today. As a result, you find yourself chasing people who surely don’t give a damn about you or numbing your pain with things you never said you would.

That’s the problem though—as much as you try to numb the symptoms, you are doing nothing to cure the cause. We feel so low that we chase the highs in other people/substances/materials. But how can we look for a love we have yet to find? Or a feeling we have yet to feel?

When you sit there and ask yourself, “If I were to be a given a love so deep, what would it look like?”, you often start to visualize emotions and materials a person can give us. You forget about the love you are already receiving and about the love you can give yourself. You know you are capable of giving someone the world but you forget to give it to yourself.

Stop giving those parts of yourself away. It is much simpler than you think. You may have heard it tons of times but I will repeat this to you once again. Change your mind and you will change your life. Completely cut off anyone who makes you feel less of yourself.

If you are constantly settling for people who lower your worth, you will never make time for those who truly value the person you are meant to be and will blossom into. Just remember you don’t need anyone who doesn’t need you!

Stop waiting for someone to come along and take you to do all the things you have ever wanted to. You are whole and are completely capable of doing amazing things in the company of yourself.  Stop waiting to hear someone tell you how wonderful you are and how much they adore you.

See also: A Letter To The One Still Waiting For Love To Come Into Her Life

 

Young woman looking at the mirror

 

Today, I challenge you!—Wake up, wash your face, look yourself straight in the eye, and give yourself a compliment. And if that seems a little too easy, I challenge you to do this every day. Tell yourself everything you want to hear from someone else. I promise you there will be no better feeling than the one you will receive.

Forget about what people think of you! If there is one thing I have learned within the process of loving myself, it is that in order to love yourself, we CAN NOT—and I repeat, CAN NOT—listen to anybody else’s perception of you.

You are not what people think you are—you are what YOU think you are. You are not what people make yourself to be—the ways of you are written in your heart and actions. And if you don’t feel too good about yourself, there is the issue in itself. But it can surely be taken care of with a few words of motivation from yourself.

Last but not least, take care and forgive yourself. I know it may sound a little on the “I’ve heard it all before side” but that’s because it is. We just choose not to ever listen, or maybe we don’t know the way to go about it. Forgive yourself in the smallest ways. “I forgive myself for making myself believe I am less than I truly am” or “ I forgive myself for not watching what I put in my body”.

In doing so, we release ourselves of the heavy burdens we carry around trying to be perfect. Let’s face it—we are humans and none of us are perfect. Therefore, we might as well accept ourselves the way we are, forgive ourselves for past mistakes, and keep loving ourselves regardless. The process of this will truly lead to abundance and self prosperity.

Take the first step of change into loving yourself. Don’t rely your happiness on other people. Today is the day you wake up and realize you have the ability to do absolutely anything you desire. Start small and always remember it is the smallest changes within ourselves that will attract the biggest changes within our lives.  

See also: 4 Reasons Why You Need to Learn to Love Yourself