Whether you are in a long-term relationship or you are just starting a new one, you are always in search of of interesting conversation topics and things to talk about with your girlfriend.
Healthy communication is the basis of every healthy relationship and that is why you need to put the the effort into tackling some deeper and more personal topics which will help you and your loved one get to know each other more.
And that is why we are here to give you 12 interesting things to talk about with your girlfriend to bring you two closer.
Common interests
When you meet a new girl, it is likely for the two of you to have some things in common, which initially attracted you to each other.
And these are exactly the things you should use as an icebreaker to start off some conversations with your girlfriend.
Your common interests can especially help you on the first date because they help you two to get to know each other and because these topics are not too private so so you won’t be invading this girl’s privacy.
These are the things you should put your focus on because this girl will like you more if she she sees that you two are similar. You’ll feel more familiar to her and she’ll love to have someone she can talk to about the things which interest her.
These similarities will help you form a special bond with this girl and it will make the two of you feel connected and this is exactly what you are trying to do, right?
So, you and your girl have the same favorite movies and TV shows? You are both self-proclaimed nerds? You listen to similar music or go out to the same places?
Great, because these are all the things you can talk to her about and you both can share your personal experiences regarding these interests.
Hobbies
Another way of getting to know your girlfriend better is to do your best to find out more about her hobbies.
What are the things she likes to do in her free time? What is her favorite leisure activity?
Is there a TV show she likes to watch? Does she play video games or read books? Does she enjoy playing or watching specific sports? Does she like to spend her free time watching her favorite show or a a movie or does she prefer outdoor activities?
If you are just at the beginning of your relationship, these are all the things you will need to put an effort into finding out over time.
Just make sure your girlfriend doesn’t feel like she is being interrogated or as if she is in an interview—ask her about these things spontaneously and make them a part of the conversation.
If you are looking for inspiration to take her out on a memorable date, you can use some of her hobbies as ideas.
If she likes climbing mountains, you can surprise her by taking her on a hike or if she loves singing, you can take her out on a karaoke night.
Daily routine
When you finish with a busy and exhausting day, there is nothing you wish for more than someone you care about to ask you all about it.
You just want someone to hear out all of your small problems and to have time for you.
And your girlfriend is no different. So the best thing you can do for her when she comes home from work is to ask her about her day.
What were the things that frustrated her and what were the small things which put a smile on her face?
Don’t push her too hard to tell you about this—just show her that you are there for her and that you are more than willing to hear her out anytime.
If you are in the beginnings of the relationship, you can ask your girl about her daily routine.
What time does she normally get up? When does she come home from work? Does she have a habit of going out on work nights?
This will help you see her schedule and it will be easier for you to plan date nights and to become a part of this girl’s everyday life.
Couples activities
Whether you are in a long-term relationship or you are just starting a new relationship, the truth is that you are always in search of new, fun and unusual couple activities and that you are trying to organize out of the ordinary date nights.
And this is something you can and should talk about with your girlfriend.
If you’ve just started going out, you should ask her about her favorite couples activities.
Does she prefer to stay in or go out? Does she enjoy long, romantic walks or does she like to go out clubbing? Does she prefer a homemade meal or a fancy dinner date?
Does she prefer for her and her romantic partner to spend more time one-on-one or would she like for the two of you to hang out with friends and other couples?
This doesn’t mean that you have to blindly follow your girlfriend’s lead nor that the two of you should be doing only the things she wants but talking about these things can help you see her wishes and try to please her.
The two of you can plan your next trip together or talk about a movie you would like to watch.
What is the movie genre she prefers to watch? How would she like to spend her next vacation? Does she prefer the mountains or the seaside?
These can all be the questions you ask her now and, when the timing is right, you can surprise her with the activity she mentioned she would love to do.
This will show your girl that you’ve been paying attention to the little things and it will mean a lot to her.
The things the two of you like and dislike about each other
Remember the first thing that went through your mind the moment you saw your girlfriend, even before she became your girlfriend?
Remember the first thing about her that you found attractive? The first thing that drew you to her? Remember what made you put the effort into trying to get to know her better?
What was the thing that made you fall in love with her and when did you realize that you loved her?
These are all the things to talk about your girlfriend and the topics you should ask her about.
I am sure you both remember the first impression you had when you met each other and she will be more than delighted to share her memories of those events with you.
But besides this, it is also important to talk about the things you two like and dislike about each other right now.
What are her favorite qualities of yours? What does she consider to be your flaws? What would you like to change about her, if you had the chance?
Don’t forget to be completely honest, even though these can be tricky topics.
There is no place for any hard feelings while the two of you tackle these issues because this is for your own good—it will help you make your relationship way better and both of you will get a chance for some self-improvement.
Let’s get one thing straight—neither of you should change the essence of your personality for the other person.
But there is nothing wrong with hearing a piece of advice regarding our behavior from our loved one.
Your families and friends
Your family and friends are important parts of your life. These are the people who helped you become the person you are today and the people whom you share incredible memories with.
And that is why this can be one of the topics to talk about with your girlfriend.
Who is her best friend now? Who was her childhood best friend? How important really is friendship to her?
You should talk to her about her male friends as well. Does she have a male best friend? How close are the two of them?
What about her family? What does family represent to her? Is she closer to her mum or her dad? Does she have any siblings or is she an only child?
If you ask all or some of these questions, your girl will see that you are honestly interested in her life and that you are really trying to find out more about her. She will be lucky to get a chance to talk about her loved ones with you.
Besides, this can give you an insight into these people. Do they impact her much? Do their opinions matter to her? What are they like?
Knowing all of this will help you become closer to your girlfriend’s family and friends, for when the time comes for you to meet each other.
And there is nothing that could make your girlfriend happier than seeing all the people she loves and deeply cares about mutually getting along.
Memories
Childhood is something most of us enjoy talking about and your girl is probably no exception.
So if you want to really get to know her, you shouldn’t start with talking about the person she is today.
Instead, it would be better to talk about the things and people that impacted her the most to become the woman she is now.
What is the happiest moment of her life so far? What is her favorite childhood memory?
But not only that—once the two of you become comfortable with each other, you can also talk about some less beautiful memories.
What are the things she would like to change about her past? What is the one moment in time she would like to go back to? What is her most painful memory?
These deep personal questions will be a refreshing way to start a conversation and will definitely help you explore your girlfriend’s mind.
Just make sure to share some of your experiences, because she won’t feel comfortable talking about herself if you don’t do the same.
If you want to move on from serious topics and reduce the tension, you can start talking about your funny memories as well.
Share your most shameful experience and ask her to talk about her most embarrassing moments.
Views on love and romance
After you’ve tackled some of the most important topics regarding both of you individually, it is time to start talking about the things concerning love and romance.
But before you start talking about your relationship, maybe it is best to talk about these things in general.
Firstly, does this girl believe in love? Does she believe that two people can love each other, no matter what and without any conditions? What does love mean to her?
Does she follow her heart blindly in love matters or does she let her reason make the final choice?
What is the craziest thing she has ever done for love? What is the biggest thing she is ready to do for the sake of having a healthy relationship?
What are her most important deal-breakers? What is the type of man she could never picture herself being with? Who is her perfect man? What characteristics and qualities should he have?
According to her, what are the most important things in a relationship? Is it that two people deeply care for each other? Is it respect? Compromise? Fidelity?
What is the one thing she would never forgive her partner for, despite all the love she might feel for him? How does she truly feel about cheating? Would she ever put her ego in front of her relationship?
Is she a hopeless romantic or does she prefer to be down to earth?
Does she believe that love can conquer all and that it is something she can’t live without or does she think that sometimes love isn’t enough?
Obviously, you won’t be interviewing your girlfriend and you won’t ask her all of these questions but all of this can serve you as directions and it can help you keep the conversation going and find out this girl’s attitude about relationships in general.
Pay close attention to whatever she is telling you because her answers and opinions will have a great impact on your relationship.
Marriage and kids
Tackling the topic of marriage and children is quite inappropriate when you and your girlfriend just start dating.
I assume you have your goals and attitudes toward this important topic so naturally, you want to know where you stand.
You want to know whether you’ve started seeing someone who wants the same things from life as you do or if you are just wasting your time because the two of you don’t feel the same way about this and could never compromise about something this crucial.
But please, hold yourself back at the beginning of the relationship from even mentioning the possibility of the two of you starting a family some day, no matter how hard you’ve fallen for this girl and despite the fact that you could see her as the love of your life and imagine her being the mother to your children after the first date.
Because the only thing you will accomplish by telling her these things is chasing this girl away.
Instead, wait until your relationship becomes a little more serious before tackling these issues.
And when this happens, you should definitely see what these girl’s views are on marriage and kids in general.
Does she believe in marriage? Does she think that she could love only one man for the rest of her life?
What is the one thing she would never tolerate in a marriage? What is her idea of a perfect marriage?
Would she like to move in together with her partner before getting married? What kind of wedding would she like to have?
Does she hope to start a family and have children one day? How many kids does she want to have? What type of mother does she think she’d be?
If you are young, neither of you might see the importance of this topic but as you grow older, you start to see that it’s crucial to have a partner who has the same world views as you do regarding family, marriage and kids.
On the contrary, your different opinions about these things can cause you much trouble and many headaches.
Your past relationships
We’ve finally come to something that has probably interested you from day one: your girlfriend’s exes. I am sure you want to know all about her past relationships; who is the man she loved the most?
Who hurt her the most? How long did her longest relationship last? Why did her last relationship end?
Even though these are all the things you want to know more about, be aware that you can’t ask her all of these questions directly because if you did, you would be invading her privacy.
Besides, the last thing you want is to remind her of her exes and to make them a part of your relationship.
Give her some time and she’ll tell you everything you need to know when she feels ready.
When that happens, make sure you never ask her about her sexual history or to ask her to compare you and your relationship with her exes because that will make you look insecure and that is something you don’t want.
Also, when she talks to you about her exes, put the effort in to listen to her instead of being overly jealous.
Remember that these men are a part of her past and that she has chosen to be with you now, so there is no reason for you to be intimidated by them.
This is something you need to be careful about when it comes to your exes and past relationships as well.
The last thing you should do is give your girlfriend the impression that you are just using her to get over your ex and this is exactly what you’ll accomplish if you keep bringing her up.
On the other hand, if she asks you something, the best thing you can do is give her a short and concrete answer, so she doesn’t feel like you are avoiding talking about your exes because that might give her the impression that you are trying to hide something.
When you talk about your past break-ups, make sure to be realistic. Never put all the blame on your ex and never try to blame her for all the wrong things in your relationship because that will look like you have a habit of running away from responsibility and that might scare your girlfriend off.
Also, make sure to never talk trash about your exes. After all, these girls were a huge part of your life and by insulting them and diminishing your relationships, you are only insulting yourself.
Besides, the way you talk about your exes will also be the way you’ll talk about your current girlfriend if the two of you happen to split up and nobody wants to be with a guy who badmouths his exes.
If you’ve stayed friends with one of your exes, say that to your girlfriend right away.
Explain that there is nothing going on between the two of you anymore and that she is just your friend now.
If you try to hide the fact that you’ve been in any way romantically involved with this girl in the past, just to avoid disagreements now, it will look like you are trying to hide something once your girlfriend finds out that this girl is actually your ex.
Your relationship in the future
Once the two of you are done with talking about your previous relationships, it’s about time you tackle something more important—it’s about time you start talking about your future together.
It is crucial for you and your girlfriend to have the same views and hopes regarding your relationship because it is problematic if one of you sees this as a serious relationship with a future while the other one sees it as nothing more than a meaningless fling or a rebound relationship.
And this is something you should define after a few dates. There is nothing desperate about wanting to know where you stand.
Wanting to label your relationship doesn’t make you any less masculine.
Instead, it only shows that you are a mature man who knows what he wants and doesn’t plan on wasting his time or energy on anything else.
Don’t be mistaken—there is nothing wrong if both you and your girl aren’t looking for anything serious; it is just important that the two of you are on the same page.
Of course, nobody can guarantee that things will turn out to be just the way you two have planned but it’s important for both of you to have the common goal of going in the same direction.
After you’ve sorted this out, it’s time to talk about some more concrete things.
What does your girlfriend exactly expect from this relationship? What does she expect from you as her boyfriend?
What are the things she would like to change in your relationship? How can both of you work on improving your relationship?
What are her happiest and saddest memories regarding your relationship? Are there some things she regrets concerning your romance and some things she would do differently, if she had the chance to?
Don’t be afraid to give your insights into the relationship as well.
It is important for both of you to do your best to look at things as realistically as possible because that is the only way to make your relationship better and healthier.
Sex
Another important topic of conversation between romantic partners should be sex because that is a crucial part of every relationship and something you and your girlfriend should pay attention to.
Even though sex has a huge impact on your relationship, it is not a topic you should bring up when you and your girlfriend just start dating unless you want to appear creepy.
Besides, it can give the impression that you only want to get into her pants and you might be crossing her boundaries.
But as soon as the two of you start relaxing in front of each other and as soon sex becomes a part of the relationship, it is always something you ought to talk about.
Sadly, many couples are not satisfied with their sex life and that mostly happens due to a lack of healthy communication.
You need to encourage your girlfriend to be honest about the things she likes and dislikes in bed because that will help both of you enjoy yourselves.
What is her favorite sex position? What is the thing she would like to change about your sex life? Is she satisfied with your sex life in general?
And what about you? What are your sexual preferences? What are the things you would like to change or improve?
Just make sure not to tackle the issue of your sexual histories too much because it is never appropriate to brag about the number of girls you’ve slept with or ask your girlfriend about the number of her sexual partners!
