Here you are again, repeating the same old scenario, hoping that something will change. Hoping that he will realize your worth and treat you better.
Look inside your soul and be honest with yourself—he is never going to change.
He doesn’t want to change. He already thinks he is great and on the days when he himself can’t justify his actions, he blames you for his behavior.
He blames you for everything because it’s easier than admitting that he is wrong. It’s easier to play the victim than to man up and face his actions. It’s easier than to see a fault in his system and try to improve it.
Sure, there are days in which he swears he will change. Usually, those are the days when he fears he will lose the hold he has over you forever.
But as soon as you forgive him, as soon as he feels you are falling for his lies once again, he will go back to his old ways. He will hurt you again and again, as long as you allow him to do so.
He will go back to disrespecting you. He will go back to not texting, not finding time for you and not giving you the emotional support you so desperately need.
With him, it’s always going to be the same. The same scenario will keep on repeating itself until you decide that enough is enough.
Stop making excuses for him. There are none. There is nothing in this world that can justify all the tears that rolled down your face. There is nothing that can make up for the lack of love and respect.
I know it’s breaking your heart that no matter how much you love him and no matter how many times you tried to make things work, it was never enough.
But don’t beat yourself up. It’s not your fault. There was nothing you could have done better or said differently to change the final result; you simply fell for the wrong person.
It’s time you open your eyes and see that. You deserve a better life than this. You deserve the happiness he never knew how to give you. You deserve to be loved by somebody who knows how to love.
He is not that man. The only person he loves is himself. He is only attentive to his needs, he only cares about his own interests. He is only interested in things he can take from you because he has nothing to give.
Open your eyes and see what your life could be without him. You could be free of this emotional roller coaster that’s getting you nauseous all the time. You could finally find that inner peace that he has deprived you of.
The thing you have with him or had with him, whichever you prefer, is not your life’s love story. It’s just one bad chapter you had to experience so you could grow stronger from it. So you could break and heal and never repeat the same mistake again.
He is not the one for you, he is just someone who had to teach you what love should never look like, what you should never settle for.
Admit to yourself that with him, you are settling. You are settling for something that comes and goes and takes pieces of you with it. You are settling for low investments and fragments of love. You are settling for life without joy.
Don’t sell yourself short. Don’t be afraid to be alone. Being single can be a blessing in itself if you look at it the right way.
On the other hand, staying in a crappy relationship, constantly forgiving somebody who is beyond forgiveness, believing in a change that will never happen, will only destroy you.
Save yourself from his toxic clutches. Stop forgiving him and ask yourself for forgiveness instead, because you stayed when you knew deep down that you should leave.
Let him go and grab onto yourself. Love yourself with every atom of your being. Be a woman who has the courage to stand on her own and build her own happiness.
You got this, you can do it on your own, he is just standing in your way.
Leah Lee – Writer. Dreamer. Adventurer. Eternal Optimist.
I am an English language and literature professor and writing came naturally alongside that. It was something I did for me until I decided to share it with the rest of the world.
I write about love, emotions, relationship issues and ways to solve them and most importantly about empowering women to become the best versions of themselves.
My inspiration comes from all that I’ve been through in life, and it was a bumpy road but full of valuable lessons. I hope that my experience will do some good to all of those who like to read my work.