People who can be described as narcissists are unable to feel genuine happiness and fulfilment and therefore depend on external factors to feel better about themselves.
They are deeply insecure, jaded people who need to diminish other people’s self-worth in order to feel important and powerful. Their sense of self is severely distorted and this is why they need YOU to keep their ego on a high.
They are miserable people who need money, status, and expensive things to keep them going; seeing other people do badly makes them feel more powerful and fuels their energy.
Narcissists need to put people down to bring themselves up.
When a narcissist sees you doing well and being genuinely happy, it reminds him of how empty he is on the inside. It evokes a strong urge inside of him to screw with your happiness in order to pull you down to their level.
People of narcissistic tendencies are envious and entitled so they cannot fathom seeing others succeed. They think they are better than you, so naturally to them, you don’t deserve anything. Therefore, when they see you with something they don’t have, they immediately go into attack mode.
To them, they deserve it more than you and their jealousy and need to bring you down is at its highest.
Narcissists lack empathy and this leads to them being frustrated with seeing you gain so much respect and praise for something, because they believe you didn’t work for it.
Narcissists use sleazy tactics and their charm to get what they want, so they are unable to believe you did your thing the hard way. They feel more deserving of everything than you and they can’t accept the fact that you’re more successful than them.
To a narcissist, it is impossible that another person is capable of being more talented and worthy than them, so they are filled with rage and discontent seeing you receive the praise they believe should be directed at them.
And that is why they learn to hate seeing you’re happy and thriving, even though you did everything the right way. To them, it’s extremely unfair. There are either winners or losers, no middle ground, and they need to be the winners in every scenario.
In order to elevate themselves, narcissists will try and put you in your place by challenging you or attacking you. Either way, they need to win. They need to feel superior, because it is the only way they can thrive.
They are deeply insecure people (which they will vehemently deny) and this insecurity causes them to act out in the most toxic and evil ways. A narcissist sees your happiness and success as a threat, and he must do everything he can to eliminate it.
A narcissist will compare himself to you to the point of seeing you as the bad guy for doing well and needing to take that away from you. They cannot fathom being seen as flawed or imperfect, and your success makes him feel like he’s below you.
In their sadistic point of view, you deserve to feel bad, wrong, and put in your place. It makes them happy when you’re feeling pain and distress because, in their eyes, you’re bad.
There are some worse cases where a narcissist will feel so threatened by your mere presence that they will smear your name and try to make you look bad in everybody else’s eyes. This is only further proof of how toxic and damaged they really are.
If you have recently been romantically linked to a narcissistic guy, the best thing you can do is put as much distance as you can between you and him. If he’s still pining after you and you’ve moved on, your newfound happiness is only going to make him feel less sufficient and worthy.
Narcissistic men cannot stand seeing their ex doing well post-breakup because that means there is somebody else out there more capable of making you happy – therefore making him a loser in his eyes.
This will make him act out and possibly reach out and try to pick apart your new man in order to make him appear less appealing in your eyes and paint a better picture of himself to you.
They need to be the best and they need YOU to think that. The idea of another man making you so visibly happy is the biggest blow to his self-esteem.
People with serious narcissistic tendencies are simply unable to see you happy. This is because they consider it an attack on their superiority and they just cannot have that. They will use whichever justification they need to make your happiness appear as a hostile act against them.
It’s important that you never let this get to you. This is a big issue on his part and it doesn’t have to affect you in any way. Unless you give him the attention he so badly craves, you’re going to be just fine.
He needs your reaction to feed off. If you don’t give it to him, he’s got nothing to work with, and that’s your upper hand.
Narcissists will always find a way and reason to feel jealous and attacked, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it too. Simply stay away and don’t give into his cheap attempts to bring you down.
You do you and let him brew in his misery. On the outside, he might seem calm and collected – but on the inside, it’s slowly killing him! So, let him suffer in his silent agony, and enjoy your narcissist-free life.