It is natural for you to be hurt after a break-up. It is completely normal for you to cry, to feel bad and to grieve the loss of your romantic partner.
However, it is completely different when you’re involved with someone toxic. In fact, this type of man makes you feel more than one damaging emotion and here are 10 of them.
The first thing every toxic man you let into your life will do to you is break your heart and leave unerasable scars on it.
He will shatter it with every move he makes to the point where you’ll think it is utterly impossible to glue it back together.
Yes, every break-up probably leaves you heartbroken. However, the difference between this man and all the other guys you were ever involved with is that a toxic man won’t only break your heart once you two part ways—he will be doing it throughout your entire relationship.
I’m not saying that you two won’t have any happy moments but I can assure you that sadly, pain will prevail.
He will hurt you in ways you couldn’t have imagined and he will end up crushing your vulnerable heart into a million pieces.
After some time spent next to a toxic person, you become tired.
Nevertheless, I’m not talking about physical tiredness here only, even though it is also one of the side effects which you will likely have.
I’m talking about that feeling when you’re emotionally drained and worn out. About losing the will to live and not having the strength to keep on going.
A toxic man leaves you depressed and feeling like you can’t get out of bed. He will make you want to give up on everything you set your mind to.
You see, a guy like this, the constant arguments he provokes and the constant tears he makes you cry exhaust you to the point where you just want to spend the rest of your life closed up in your room, with a blanket over your head.
You feel like you’re too weak to finish your everyday chores, let alone actually do something with your life.
Am I overreacting? Did it all really happen the way I remember it or am I actually imagining things?
Am I the crazy one? Is he gaslighting me or did I misinterpret our entire conversation?
If these are some of the questions you’ve been asking yourself lately, you’re on your way to feeling completely insane.
And that is exactly what this guy wants—manipulating you into thinking that you’re the crazy one and making you doubt your own right mind.
Of course, he won’t accomplish all of this right from the start.
However, after a while spent next to him, you will have a tiny voice in your head, telling you that maybe he is right, after all, and that you’re the one making all of a fuss over nothing.
After some time, you’ll start examining your own memory and view of things.
You’ll start doubting yourself and your own reason.
Another thing a toxic man will make you feel is stupid.
Besides undermining your intelligence and acting like he is smarter than you and that he always knows better during your relationship, you’ll continue feeling this way even after you break loose from him.
The moment you get out of this toxic romance and the moment you start observing it from a distance, you will be wondering how come you couldn’t have seen some things sooner.
How come you were such a fool who believed in this man’s lies and how could you have thought that he would change?
After going through hell with him, you’ll start questioning all of your choices.
Are you even mature enough to run your own life and can you rely on your judgment-making skills?
When you’re around a toxic boyfriend, you’re never pretty, smart, beautiful, attractive or interesting enough.
No matter what you do, how hard you try, what big sacrifices you make and how deeply you care for him—nothing you ever do will be good enough.
At first, he tries to ‘improve you’ and ‘for your own good’. His insults are masked by pieces of advice and you don’t notice that he is actually doing his best to humiliate you.
You don’t see how he is constantly treating you like you’re the submissive one.
How he is always acting like he is above you and that you should consider yourself lucky for a catch like him to lay his eyes on you.
Once you realize what is going on, it becomes too late. You’re already dealing with loads of insecurities he managed to deeply root inside of you.
Before you know it, you begin questioning your own worth and you start thinking of yourself as not good enough as well.
After all, you’re doing your best and this man is never pleased so you must be the problem.
When you spend your entire relationship comparing yourself to every girl who walks by your ex and especially with his exes, it is natural that your jealousy reaches its peak.
When you spend years hearing that all those other girls are better than you and that you could never be like them, it is natural for you to start hating them, without knowing they have nothing to do with the fact that you’re dating a toxic man who is only putting you down with his nasty comments.
When you are being told that you’re replaceable and that you’re nothing special, when you’re cheated on more than once, when every other girl’s looks and qualities have been rubbed in your face, it is natural that your jealousy becomes unhealthy.
When you’re living a hell on earth while watching all of your friends in happy relationships, having the time of their lives, you become envious.
And that is exactly what your toxic partner wants—to turn you into a much worse person than you actually are.
Even though you’re the victim of this story, somehow, your toxic boyfriend managed to turn the tables and make you look like the bad guy here.
Even though he is the one who’s treating you like shit, he succeeds in putting all the blame on you.
Instead of taking responsibility and standing behind his actions, it is much easier for him to accuse you of the fact that your relationship is falling apart.
It is easier to make you feel like the guilty one than to face reality and admit to both of you that he is the only one to blame.
If he’s cheating on you, he did it because you deprived him of sex, because you don’t look the way you used to or because this other woman gave him something you couldn’t.
Either way, the bottom line is that you pushed him into someone else’s arms and he would have never thought of having an affair if you hadn’t caused him to.
If he is abusing you, you made him nervous, you looked at him the wrong way or you yelled while you two were fighting. And the list goes on and on.
Unable to love
Once you’re done with a toxic boyfriend, you’re convinced that you can never love another man the way you loved him.
You think that he killed your ability to care about someone of the opposite sex, to let a new guy in or to ever trust anyone else again.
Not only that—he makes you believe that all other men are just like him.
That there is absolutely no point in searching for someone better because every single boyfriend would treat you even worse than he did.
So, it is much better to remain in your comfort zone, where you know what to expect.
After all, at least you know you loved this toxic man once and that is better than being with someone you’re totally indifferent toward.
Not meant to be loved
However, a toxic man won’t only persuade you that you can’t love someone else after him. In fact, he will also do his best to make you believe that no man could ever love you the way he did.
After all, who would want an emotionally damaged woman by his side? Who would have the patience to wait for you to open up and to let him in?
What man would be ready to heal your wounds and to live with your scars?
What man would waste his time on a woman who needs fixing and who is so damaged?
Besides, if this guy who’s known you for so long claims that you have so many flaws and if he keeps on pointing out your imperfections, what else could this new man see?
If he can’t tolerate you and if he thinks you’re not enough, every guy who comes into your life will surely consider you as not meant to be loved.
Another emotion all toxic boyfriends wake up inside of their victims is fear.
And I’m talking here about irrational, paralyzing fear which doesn’t allow you to function properly.
At first, you’re scared of everything this man is capable of. What will he do to you next?
After that, when you take off your rose-tinted glasses, you’re afraid of leaving him. Do you have what it takes to get by without him?
Once you’re done with him, you’re scared of going back to the real world. Will you make it?
You’re afraid of feeling like this forever. Will you ever heal and move on for real?
And finally, you’re scared of moving on. Will your next experience end up the same way this one did?