For as long as you can remember, you’ve had some crappy relationships, to say the least.

In fact, there is a continuous pattern in most of your romances, so you might even say that history has a way of repeating itself when it comes to you.

You don’t pick guys who are douchebags at first sight. You don’t go after players. Instead, most of your ex-boyfriends appeared to be nice in the beginning.

While they were courting you, they gave you a bunch of promises and you considered yourself lucky for finding them.

However, as each relationship progressed, things slowly started to change. These nice men turned into monsters.

The worst part is that they treated you even worse the moment you showed them your vulnerable side. The more you loved them, the bigger jerks they became.

So, what was the problem? Well, the fact is that you probably started off on the wrong foot.

woman in black top standing in forest

You see, each one of these men managed to enchant you so much right away that you forgot to set some ground rules. In fact, it seems that you completely forget about your deal-breakers once you fall in love.

I get your point of view. You think that compromise is everything and you don’t want to ask for too much from the man you care about.

After all, if love is real, there is absolutely no need for game playing. You have no trouble admitting your emotions to your partner, nor do you demand the impossible from him.

Well, sadly for you, most men see this behavior as a chance to hurt you. They start taking you for granted and they stop putting any effort into your relationship.

Don’t misunderstand me; I’m not advising you to become hard to get. I’m not telling you to suddenly become a bitch just to get your boyfriend’s attention.

However, don’t lower your standards for him either. Don’t settle for the things that shouldn’t be acceptable just because you love him.

Remember one thing: you’re training men how to treat you. 

Every time you put your man’s needs in front of your own, without expecting him to return the favor when you are in need, you’re showing him that you don’t matter.

woman in white top sitting on concrete building

You’re indirectly telling him that he is more important than you and that you’re perfectly okay with your well-being coming last.

Every time he insults you and you keep quiet, you’re telling him that you don’t mind his behavior. You’re showing him that you really do believe him that you’re not good enough.

Every time he cancels plans without you saying anything about it, you show him that your time isn’t valuable. You’re actually telling him that you can put your life on hold and wait until he has the decency to see you.

Every time you double or triple text him, despite him not answering your messages for hours without a valid reason, you’re telling him that he has your undivided attention, no matter what.

You’re showing him that he doesn’t have to lift a finger to win it and that he doesn’t have to fight for your love. You’re indirectly saying that you’re not going anywhere, despite his treatment.

Every time you catch him flirting with other girls but stay by his side, you’re showing him that you wouldn’t have a problem sharing him with someone else. You’re telling him that you would even accept his infidelity.

The list can go on forever but I’m sure you see where I’m going. It’s up to you how you will set rules in your relationship and your partner will just follow your example.

woman in white cardigan sitting on dock

Whenever you accept this man’s lack of respect, you’re showing him that you don’t respect yourself either.

Whenever you settle for crumbs of his love and attention, you’re telling him that even you think you don’t deserve more. 

Whenever you complain about him not treating you right but don’t actually do anything about it, you’re applauding him for his behavior. 

Whenever you give him a second chance for something he shouldn’t have done, you’re showing him that your capacity to forgive is endless.

Whenever you tolerate your boyfriend’s misbehavior, you’re giving him the green light to keep up the good work. 

You’re telling him that everything he does is perfectly acceptable and that you don’t have a problem with his actions.