So, last night I was texting my friend who got married last year. She’s my college friend and we had a crazy time back then, but somehow, she changed.
I remember we used to make fun of those women who got married and completely forgot who they were, all of a sudden turning into these Stepford wives. It seems now that she’s become one of them.
I was complaining about something, pointing out how unrightful it was and how pissed it made me. She texted me: that’s all rubbish, the best thing for you is to find yourself a boyfriend!
Really? That is your answer, to find myself a boyfriend? All of a sudden you know better because you’re married, and all of my work and accomplishments are rubbish because I don’t have a man?
People, relatives, friends in a relationship – stop telling me I need to find a boyfriend!
Maybe I don’t want anyone. Maybe I am so involved in my career, charity work, and paying off a student loan that I don’t have time or energy for anyone.
Why is it that you presume I am unhappy if I am alone?
Why do you think that all my activities and the extra effort I put in at work is because I don’t know what else to do with my life due to the fact that I am single and therefore “have no purpose”?
According to my friend who used to be a cool person and would also get pissed at some unjust issues like me, I am faking and distracting myself from the real issue that’s bugging me, and that is my single status.
Who gives you the right to invalidate all my accomplishments and beliefs based on your narrow-minded opinions?
And don’t get me started on family meetings and family in general. I spent my entire high school listening to them nagging how I need to get into a good college.
Then I spent my entire college focused on graduating in time, and not getting pregnant or dropping out of college so that I could get a decent job.
After finally getting on my feet, they started pestering about how I am single and everything I did is irrelevant now.
When are you people finally going to accept my choices and let me live? Because guys, I am okay with my life. I am happy, I accomplished everything by myself, and I am finally free and independent.
I spend my money on travelling, handbags. I am also involved in volunteering I can cook whatever I want and I don’t need to prepare dinner for anyone. I can go out at midnight and get myself a McDonalds burger if that’s what I want.
I really, truly am satisfied. And if I am okay with your lives and happy for your marriage and kids or relationships, why can’t you be happy for me?
If I was unhappy and clearly stated I crave a relationship, I would have found myself someone, anyone. So, please, respect me, my decisions, and my beliefs, and stop thinking and saying that I need to find a boyfriend.
And to my friend if she is reading this, if I did have a boyfriend and the same beliefs that I do now, would you respect them?
According to you, would I then be a complete person, or would you still think they are rubbish? Because if you can validate my opinion only if I have a man, we really can’t be friends anymore.
