Yes, I know what’s going through your mind right now: ‘’Of course, people aren’t always who we think they are. Everyone has a limited perception.’’
Bear with me though. Has it ever happened to you to lose a friend over something they did that you thought to be impossible for them to do?
Have you ever spent a bunch of precious time of your life in a relationship that deep down you knew wasn’t going right? You create a certain image of a person in your head and refuse to change it.
People show us who they are, we just don’t want to believe it. We don’t want to accept the harsh truth about someone we hold dear.
We don’t want to know our loved one or our friend isn’t as good of a person as we imagine them to be.
We are all victim to our own mind and ego playing games with us, making us believe everything we perceive as true is absolutely true.
It takes years, a lot of them, to really know someone.
Sometimes, we find ourself at a certain point in our life when we need goodness in it. We meet a person and we need them to be good and suddenly they are.
We need a guy to be our soulmate and we make ourself believe he is. We need to have a true friend and the most convenient person in our life becomes just that in our mind.
We recognize in people the things we’re desperately searching for.
Sometimes, we see people as we are, not as they are, because that’s the only way we know.
People don’t have to persuade us to see them a certain way. We choose how we see them anyway.
That’s why those among us who are the best possible people they can be get easily deceived. They get hurt by people because they suppose everyone is as good as they are.
Sadly, not everyone will treat you the way you treat them. There are some times when there’s so much more to know that isn’t tied to our direct experiences with them.
Some people are so much more or so much less than we give them credit for. We create our image of a person based on the experiences we’ve had with them.
Luckily, or sadly, depending on your point of view, the experiences they share with us aren’t their only experiences in life. This is why it takes so much time to know someone.
We have to spend a lot of time with them to go through all of our stories and have the opportunity to have many different experiences together.
It’s the only way to truly get to know someone.
Don’t trust your opinion of someone if you have just met them. Yes, there are instincts and there is intuition but before you follow them, ask yourself if your ‘intuition’ is telling you what you want to hear. Because our mind works in wondrous ways.
Sometimes, we see a person as something they can be rather than something they really are.
Often in life, we see people through this prism of their potential and possibilities. To be brutal, very few people achieve their full potential.
Let’s say you’re in a relationship. Your boyfriend has some wonderful traits but also many flaws which, in the future, he can correct if he’d only try to.
You just know he has it in him to be the most gentle, loving guy there is. The truth is, you’re looking at him through your ‘unachieved potential’ goggles and chances are he’s never ever going to change.
The most wonderful part of it all is that sometimes, people can surprise us with how amazing they are.
You might have met those people when they were at their lowest or maybe you were at your lowest and didn’t see things clearly.
Yes, some people in your life are going to prove themselves to be so amazing that you won’t believe it. You’ll wonder how you didn’t see them as those lovely persons before.
That’s just it, we’re not always able to create a completely true image of someone in our mind.
Surround yourself with people who make you feel good, people who are honest and kind and hope for the best.
The truth is, we’re all on this crazy ride together and the best we can do is love each other and hope things work out for us.