The girl you had by your side was special. This was the girl who gave you her heart that she wore on her sleeve and the girl who loved you unconditionally and no matter what.
The girl who was ready to put up with your bullshit and the girl who was willing to do whatever it took just to see you happy.
You know very well that she never asked for much in return for all of her sacrifices. She just wanted your love and appreciation. But you couldn’t get yourself to give her even that.
Instead of treating her the way she deserved, you made her life a living hell .
And when she finally saw that you weren’t going to change and when she saw that she was about to lose herself completely next to you, she left you.
When she finally realized that you were breaking her, she walked away from you. When she finally saw that you weren’t worthy of her, you lost her for good.
But no, you didn’t lose her overnight. You may not know it but your behavior was pushing this girl away for quite some time.
You may not be aware of it but you were actually gradually losing her for years.
You were losing her every time you put her last. Every time you treated her as a second choice , as your backup plan and as a last resort.
Every time you made her think that she wasn’t worthy of your time or effort.
You were slowly losing her in each situation in which you chose everyone else over her and in which you showed her that she was at the bottom of your priority list.
She was distancing herself from you every time you made her beg for little crumbs of your love and attention and every time she felt like she was forcing you to be with her.
You may not know it but the truth is that throughout the years, you made this girl feel unloved and unwanted and these are the last things anyone wants to feel.
You were pushing her away every time you made her cry. Every time she cried herself to sleep and every time you weren’t around to wipe her tears away.
Every time you didn’t make an effort to put a smile back on her face.
Remember all those nights you stood her up and left her hanging? All those times you didn’t pick up the phone and all those nights you left her waiting?
Well, guess what? You were losing her more and more each time she fell asleep, all dressed up with her phone in her hands, desperately waiting for you to call her.
You pushed her away because you were taking her for granted. Because you thought that she would stick around, no matter how much harm you caused her and no matter how you treated her.
You were losing her every time you tried to play with her. Every time you took advantage of all the love she felt for you and every time you used her vulnerable heart.
You were losing her every time you chose some other girl over her. Every time you made her compare herself to and compete with all those other women around you.
Every time you didn’t give her the place she deserved in your life.
You were pushing her away every time you weren’t faithful or loyal. Every time she caught you texting other girls and every time she forgave you for cheating on her.
You lost her because you didn’t want to commit. Because you refused to put a label on your relationship and because you pretended to be emotionally broken, while you were just an asshole .
You lost her because you made her feel like she wasn’t enough. Because you fed her insecurities, instead of boosting her self-esteem.
Because you were her weakness instead of her strength. Because you used her vulnerabilities instead of protecting those parts of her.
You lost her because you lied to her.
Because you lied that you just needed time to get your shit together, you manipulated her into thinking that she was the only girl in your life and that things would turn out OK between the two of you.
She left because you made all of those fake promises that you’d change and that you’d start treating her the way she deserved.
You pushed her away because you were never ready to compromise or to meet her halfway.
Because you never took her needs into consideration and because you always acted like a selfish jerk who only took care of himself.
The truth is that this girl got tired of chasing you and waiting for you to change. Tired of making sacrifices and putting in the effort.
Tired of giving you her entire self while she was getting nothing in return .
The truth is that you were slowly losing her each time you broke her heart.