When you start a romantic relationship, the last thing that is on your mind is if it will turn into a toxic one or if it will remain a healthy one. Some of us don’t even see the red flags, so we think that we just have a crisis that will soon pass.
But in the end, we get hurt and that is inevitable in a toxic relationship. So, if you are not sure what you should tolerate in a relationship and what you should cut off the same moment you see it, here are some things that you need to pay attention to.
1. People in healthy relationships have enormous trust in each other.
They don’t’ freak out every time their partner goes out with their companions and they don’t go crazy when someone hits on their partner. They know that their partner chose them and that there is nobody they would rather be with.
People in toxic relationships check each other’s personal stuff. They are so obsessed with cheating that they will probably check their partner’s social media sites accounts and texts from their cell phone. The bad thing is that if they continue to act like that, they will soon burn out because that is not a good way to be in a relationship.
2. People in healthy relationships push their partners to be the best versions of themselves.
They feel happy when their partners reach their goals and when things go well in their lives. They are not jealous of each other and they are happy with the lives they’ve created for themselves.
People in toxic relationships hold back their partners. They are terrified of the idea that their partners succeed in their lives and that they are stuck somewhere in the middle. That’s why they try to hold them back and to give them bad advice.
3. People in healthy relationships have their own spare time.
They don’t want to be stuck with their partners all the time because they cherish the time they spend alone or with their friends and family. They know how that is important and they would never sacrifice it.
People in toxic relationships are glued to each other. They are extremely insecure and they think that if they leave their partners alone that someone will steal them. They have low self-esteem and no matter whether they enjoy themselves in their partner’s company or not, they will still be with them.
4. People in healthy relationships are equal.
That means that both of them can do whatever they want, but at the same time, pay attention not to hurt their loved one. They respect each other and they treat each other like they are supposed to.
People in toxic relationships don’t have equal status. One of them is always dominant and the other has to obey them. If the guy is dominant, the girl should do everything that he wishes and she should forget about her aspirations and her wishes.
5. People in healthy relationships communicate openly.
Even if there are bumps on the road, they try to handle them in a normal and civilized way. They don’t want to fight with each other because they don’t see the point in that so they talk openly about things that they are not comfortable with.
People in toxic relationships don’t communicate openly. They like to do silent treatments whenever things get bad. That is their way of handling problems. They simply act like children and don’t want to make the first move to actually solve the problem.
6. People in healthy relationships accept each other completely.
They refuse to change each other because they fell in love with those people just because of the way they are. So it would be wrong to change something that you actually like, right?
People in toxic relationships seek constant change. The truth is that people like this can’t accept their partners completely. They would prefer it if they could mold them into something they like. They would like it if their partners would behave like puppets and they would be their masters. I probably don’t have to explain why this kind of relationship is sick!
7. People in healthy relationships support each other.
They think that their partner is their best friend at the same time and they want to be with them whenever they need it. No matter what happens, they will be first to help and to tell them that everything will be okay. They are true friends and they don’t have problems going the extra mile for their loved ones.
People in toxic relationships never give support to their partners. A reason for this might be the lack of love and respect, but they still don’t want to break up because they feel much safer when they have someone they can lean on. They think it is better to be in any kind of relationship than being alone. The final result is a person who is unhappy and who lost every hope in eternal love.
Me and my boyfriend are together all the time and super glued because we love each other. I never think someone is “going to steal him,” we’re just each other’s best friends and love to be together. Nothing toxic about that, quite the opposite.