¿Debo enviarle un mensaje de texto? 22 cosas importantes en las que pensar primero

Did you go out on a first date with a girl and still haven’t heard from her? Or have you met someone on a dating app? Or, could your girl be giving you the silent treatment, and you don’t know what to do?

Whatever your current situation, it’s irrelevant. Lo importante es que una sola pregunta ha estado ocupando tu mente últimamente, y es: ¿debo envíale un mensaje o no, ¿tengo razón?

Well, texting rules may be confusing sometimes, and it’s perfectly normal that you feel confused and maybe even a bit scared about your next move. That doesn’t make you any less manly because the truth is, we all feel that way when we really like a girl.

Just follow this guideline, and you’ll figure out whether you should text her or not and when the right time to do that is. Also, you’ll find out the most common mistakes guys make when texting women that cost them leaving a good impression.

¿Debería Texto Ella? 17 cosas en las que pensar primero

Antes de escribir el mensaje y pulsar el botón de enviar, hay algunas preguntas que deberías hacerte. Sea sincero consigo mismo porque sólo las respuestas sinceras le ayudarán a tomar la decisión correcta.

1. What’s your current mood?

Your current mood is one of the most important factors that determine whether it’s really a good idea to text her or not. In other words, if you’re in a bad mood, angry or tired after you had a busy day or something like that, you should probably leave it for tomorrow.

If you’re happy and relaxed, then you have the green light when it comes to texting the girl you like. Al fin y al cabo, lo más importante para conquistar a una chica es hacerla reír. Humor is always the safest way to a girl’s heart.

2. ¿Por qué es tan importante para usted?

Why are you making such a big deal over it? It’s just a text – what’s the worst that could happen after you hit that send button?

Ahh, lo entiendo. Te gusta y estás preocupado acerca de lo que siente por ti. You know that her reply may be a good indicator of her feelings toward you, and that seems pretty scary to you. That’s why it’s such a big deal to you and you want to think about it before you decide to send her a text.

3. ¿Cuál es su situación sentimental actual?

Are you currently single or in a relationship with another girl? If it’s the first case, if you’re single, then there’s probably no reason not to send her a text.

On the other hand, if you’re dating someone, why are you even thinking about texting her? Wouldn’t that be unfair to your current partner?

I mean, it’s okay if she’s just a friend and you want to send her a friendly text, but I doubt it because you wouldn’t be thinking about whether you should send her that text this much. If she’s a friend, you would text her without even thinking about it.

Before you decide whether you should text her or not, think about your partner and how it would make her feel if she found out that you’ve sent another girl a text. Si te importa tu pareja, nunca la pondrás en esa situación.

4. Depende de cuáles sean tus intenciones

Tienes que pensar en la verdadera razón por la que quieres enviarle un mensaje. And it’s important to be honest with yourself because it’s the only way you’ll come to the right decision.

Si la echas de menos, quieres recuperar a tu chica o invítala a salir, you should send her a text without thinking about it any further. On the other hand, if you’re looking to have some fun because you have too much free time, then don’t text her because you might hurt her.

If you aren’t really into her, it would be unfair to keep texting her and stringing her along. Find something else to have fun with because it’s never a good idea to play with a person’s feelings.

5. ¿Se reunió con en persona, ¿o estabas mandando mensajes por internet?

Did you meet online, and texting was and still is your only form of communication? Or, on the flip side, have you met in person but haven’t texted since?

In the first case, it’s okay to send your girl a buen texto y asegúrese de mantener su conversación de texto en curso.

If you’ve met face to face, you should think about the reason you still haven’t heard from her, or if you think your primera cita in person went well, be a gentleman and reach out to her first. Who knows, maybe she’s waiting for your text the same way you’re waiting for hers.

6. ¿Dejó un buena impresión?

If you’ve met in person, you should think about the impression you left. Si ya te ha dicho que fue un placer conocerte... en persona or that she had a good time with you, then you’ve probably left a good first impression.

En ese caso, deberá envíale un simple buenas noches/morning text y agradécele la cita. Termina el mensaje con un bonito emoticono but don’t overdo it. I’m sure you won’t be left without a reply.

7. ¿Es una ex?

If she is an ex, then it’s even more complicated to know what to do. Whether you should send her a text or not depends on so many things.

Tienes que pensar en cómo terminó vuestra relación, cuándo hablaste con ella por última vez y si hay algún motivo oculto detrás de tu deseo de acercarte a ella. After you think about these things, you’ll know what to do next.

8. ¿Hiciste algo que pudiera molestarla?

If you know you’ve made a mistake that hurt her, be very careful about your text. You can’t just slide into her inbox with a simple “Hello.”

Deberías discúlpate por lo que hiciste y hacerlo rápido. Otherwise, your girl may start thinking that you don’t care about her and block you on social media, so you’ll lose your chance to communicate with her again.

9. ¿Ya le has enviado un mensaje?

If you’ve already reached out to her and sent her a follow-up text, but she left you without an answer, it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to text her again.

Dale algo más de tiempo para responder a tu mensaje anterior. And if that doesn’t happen, if she doesn’t reply, just leave her be because it’s a sign she doesn’t like you.

10. ¿Cómo terminó su última conversación?

This is a very important question you should ask yourself. If your last conversation ended well, then it’s safe for you to reach out to her again.

Por otro lado, si os peleasteis la última vez que os mandasteis un mensaje, puedes enviárselo, pero debes tener mucho cuidado con lo que dices. Si le envías el mensaje equivocado, sólo conseguirás enfadarla y empeorar aún más las cosas entre vosotros.

11. ¿Alguna vez te manda un mensaje primero?

If you’re the one to always initiate your text conversations, then you aren’t aware of the most basic rule of thumb when it comes to texting.

En proporción de mensajes de texto between you and your crush needs to be equal because that is the only way you’ll both know for sure you share the same emotions.

If she never texts you first, then you should know it’s a huge red flag she isn’t into you at all. If she responds to your texts, perhaps le gustas pero, por desgracia, no de la misma manera que te gusta a ti.

12. ¿Sabes lo que siente por ti?

¿Te ha confesado alguna vez a ti o a otra persona que también está interesada en ti? Si tuvisteis una relación, ¿estás seguro de que sigue sintiendo algo por ti?

It would be so much easier to answer your question, “Should I text her?” si supieras con certeza lo que tu chica siente por ti. The fact is, no matter what’s going on between you, if she loves you, she will answer your texts sooner or later.

13. ¿Estás chateando actualmente con alguna otra chica?

If you’re registered on an online dating app, I suppose you chat with other girls too. Or, do you do it on social media?

La cuestión es que debes tener cuidado, sobre todo si realmente te gusta esa chica. If she finds out you’re chatting with other girls online, too, it might be reason enough for her not to respond to your text.

If you’re into her, you should stop flirting with other girls. I know that men like to have backup plans, but it’s really unnecessary when you find a girl you want to be with.

14. ¿Qué desea realmente envíale un mensaje?

¿Hay alguna pregunta concreta que quieras hacerle? ¿Hay algún tema del que quieras hablar con ella?

¿O simplemente quieres mandarle un mensaje porque la echas de menos? This is also a justified reason – the thing is just that you need to know what you’ll envíale un mensaje antes de hacerlo.

If this is the first time you’ll reach out to her, you need una buena frase para ligar que la dejará boquiabierta. And if you haven’t heard from her for quite some time, you can’t go with a simple “Hi” or “How are you?” text because she’ll just think that you have too much free time on your hands and want to have some fun.

After all, you can’t send her an empty text or just an emoji. Well, you can, but it would be a foolish and immature thing to do.

15. ¿Está en tu mente 24/7?

Is the same “Should I text her?” thought on your mind constantly? If you can’t get that girl out of your head, then it’s worth taking the risk of sending her a text.

That way, at least you’ll know you’ve tried. You won’t regret missing your chance one day, and that will really mean something to you, as it should.

However, you should still try to keep things light and not immediately admit that you’re thinking about her constantly. That may scare and drive her away, and I know for sure that’s the last thing you want.

16. ¿Estás preparado para afrontar el resultado?

Sabes que puede que no tenga un final feliz, ¿verdad? Incluso si realmente intentas enviarle un buen texto que la deje boquiabierta, puede que acabes rechazado y con el corazón roto.

I know this hurts to hear, but you need to be aware of it. If you aren’t ready to handle the truth, no matter how ugly or great it is, you shouldn’t send your girl a text.

Espera a reunir el valor necesario para aceptar el resultado y encontrar la manera de afrontarlo. En la vida real, ni siquiera los príncipes y las princesas tienen siempre un final feliz.

17. Opina sobre los pros y los contras

Antes de tomar una decisión definitiva, deberías pensar en los pros y los contras de enviarle un mensaje de texto y opinar sobre ellos.

Puede enviarle un buen texto que podría dar lugar a una charla ociosa con tu chica, pero también podrías ser rechazado después de pulsar el botón de enviar. O, peor aún, puede que te ignoren, lo que duele más que el rechazo, créeme.

You can’t know the outcome for sure, but you know what the pros and cons are. After you think about them and weigh in on them, everything will become clearer, and I’m sure you’ll make the right decision, the one that will be right for you.

Cuándo no debe Texto Ella?

There is no hard-and-fast rule when you shouldn’t text a girl, but there are some situations when it’s not a good idea to send your girl a text message, even if it seems like the hardest thing to do at the time. So, let’s find out what those situations are:

1. She made it clear that she doesn’t like you

Quiero contaros mi mala experiencia con una chica que conocí en una aplicación de citas online. Llevábamos un tiempo enviándonos mensajes de texto y luego acordamos conocernos en persona.

Pensé que la reunión había ido bastante bien y decidí envíale un mensaje de buenos días al día siguiente. Todo lo que obtuve a cambio fue una respuesta breve y rápida.

Conocía su estilo de mensajes de texto, y ella era nunca un texter seco. Su respuesta fue un poco incómoda, pero pensé que tal vez estaba teniendo un día ajetreado y decidí volver a mandarle un mensaje por la noche.

I was thinking things like, “¿Con qué frecuencia debe enviar mensajes de texto? a girl?” and “Should Le mando un mensaje a una chica e invitarla a un segunda cita un día después del primera cita?” Pensé que podría parecer desesperada, pero aun así decidí arriesgarme y le envié el mensaje.

Maybe that was a turn-off for her, or I just didn’t leave a good impression after meeting-up. El caso es que me rechazó y me bloqueó en Tinder y en todas las demás aplicaciones de redes sociales que utilizábamos para estar en contacto.

Así que sería bueno que aprendieras de mi experiencia. The moment a girl shows you loud and clear that she isn’t into you is when you should turn your back on her and leave.

2. Ha terminado contigo para siempre

If a girl has broken up with you for good and made it pretty clear, you shouldn’t debase yourself by sending her texts constantly.

No tener contacto and have faith that it’ll help you move on faster. After all, you can’t keep someone by your side who doesn’t want it. You can’t force her to stay with you, and no amount of texts will change a woman’s mind when she’s determined to leave you behind and move forward.

3. Te pidió que no

Si una chica te ha pedido que dejes de mandarle mensajes, ¿tiene sentido que te plantees si deberías hacerlo o no?

When we fall head over heels for someone who doesn’t reciprocate our feelings, we all tend to expect a huge turn and continue trying to win them over. However, that’s a mistake, and the sooner we understand this, the sooner we’ll be able to move on.

Además, si sigues enviándole mensajes y acosándola, puede denunciarlo a las autoridades y pedir una orden de alejamiento. Eso te hará parecer un auténtico psicópata.

4. She’s already dating someone else

Here’s some dating advice from a guy who had to learn it the hard way: don’t ever text a girl who is already in a relationship with another man. Just trust me and don’t do it, bro.

Después de todo, piensa cómo te sentirías si otro hombre le enviara un mensaje de texto a tu novia. Don’t interfere in someone else’s relationship, and don’t ruin other people’s happiness because karma is really a bitch.

5. She didn’t respond to any of your últimos textos

If you’ve already sent her a few text messages and didn’t get a reply to any of them, it’s clear that she doesn’t want to mantener la conversación contigo.

She is ignoring you and hoping that you’ll get the message she is, in fact, trying to send to you. She isn’t interested, and you should back off!

Of course, there might be a good explanation when someone doesn’t respond to your text instantly. However, if they don’t reply for more than a day, it’s hardly possible that they aren’t doing it on purpose.

¿Qué es la regla de los 3 días?

La regla más popular para enviar mensajes de texto se llama la regla de los 3 días. La mayoría de los expertos en relaciones y coaches piensan que 3 días es el cantidad de tiempo deberías esperar antes de decidirte a acercarte y enviar a tu enamorado un mensaje de texto.

It’s a piece of texting advice you’ll get from most dating experts. That way, you’ll give the other person enough space to think about you, and you’ll also get enough time to think about your feelings.

Also, you won’t seem clingy or possessive to your crush, which is highly important. The truth is, no one likes clingy people, and bothering someone with text messages 24/7 definitely won’t bring you anything good.

¿Cómo hacer que una chica te eche de menos?

Si quieres que una chica te eche de menos, tienes que dejarle espacio para que haga sus necesidades sin dejar de controlarla regularmente.

Ten una vida fuera de tu relación. If you’re having a busy day, don’t just ditch your responsibilities when she calls you. Of course, she needs to be your priority, but she also needs to know that you’re a mature, responsible person who needs to behave that way.

Also, don’t always reply to her texts instantly. Eso sólo te hacen demasiado disponible, and here is a secret I want to reveal to you: girls don’t like availability. They want a good chase, and haciendo que te persiga es una manera infernal de hacer que te eche de menos como una loca.

¿Me echará de menos si le doy espacio?

If you want me to be honest with you, no amount of time and space will make a woman miss you if she doesn’t have any feelings for you. She won’t even think about you because she’ll probably forget that you even exist.

On the other hand, if we’re talking about a woman who likes or is in love with you, giving her some space may make her understand that she actually can’t live without you. You know the saying, “absence makes the heart grow fonder,” and I really believe it’s true.

Sin embargo, es necesario ten mucho cuidado. Si le das demasiado espacio, puedes parecer desinteresado por ella, y ella puede empezar a dudar de nuestros sentimientos.

Sigue la regla de los 3 días y envíale primero un mensaje. Presta atención a su tiempo de respuesta y a la longitud de sus respuestas. Si sigue enviándote respuestas cortas, puede ser señal de que tu mujer necesita más espacio y tiempo a solas.

En conjunto

So, are you still in “should I text her or not?”’ stage, or have I helped you figure out the right answer? However, the truth is only you can come to the right decision.

Por supuesto, tu cerebro y tu corazón tienen que estar de acuerdo. You shouldn’t allow your heart to come to a decision alone, nor should you allow your brain to.

Also, don’t think about whether she’ll devolverte el mensaje or not. Even if she decides to ignore your message and doesn’t reply, you shouldn’t allow it to make you sad.

At least you’ll know you tried. You won’t regret the missed chance sometime in the future, and whatever happens after you send the text, you should be proud of yourself.

You were fighting for the girl you liked. You didn’t back off or just sit on your hands and hope that she’d come to you by herself. You should be proud of yourself because you aren’t a coward but a strong man who isn’t afraid to follow his feelings and see where they’ll take you.