18 razones por las que los hombres huyen (+ consejos para retenerlos)
There are a few questions that bother all women around the world, and today, I’ll answer one of them… ¿Por qué la mayoría de los hombres huyen de las relaciones sentimentales? ¿Qué razones tienen para dar un paso tan cobarde?
Y hay bastantes razones que podrían explicar su necesidad de tomar tal decisión. To be clear, I’m not justifying these cowardly actions because there is always another way.
However, it’s always easier to run away from a problem than to confront it, and as it seems, men know this best. It takes a real man to gather the strength to face his fears and problems.
Por qué huyen los hombres: 18 razones comunes
Let’s take a peek into the male mind and find out the possible reasons they flee from love and relaciones comprometidas.
1. Demasiado o muy poco amor
O te quiere mucho y tiene miedo de ese amor, o he doesn’t love you at all. If a man runs away from you, he either loves you deeply or doesn’t love you at all – there is no middle there.
Si te quiere de verdad, it’s possible that he got scared of his true feelings. It’s probably the first time he has fallen so deeply in love, and that unfamiliar emotion scared the hell out of him.
He doesn’t know how to handle it and how to deal with such strong emotions. He can’t talk to you about it because he thinks it would make him seem cowardly and weak.
On the flip side, the possible reason for your man running away may be the absolute lack of love. If he doesn’t love you, there is no reason for him to stay with you anymore. However, I do agree that running away is never the right way to end things with someone.
2. Las cosas van demasiado rápido
¿Teníais una relación sana y decidisteis dar un paso más y hacer que vuestra relación fuera un poco más seria? ¿O le has sugerido que pase al siguiente nivel?
It’s no wonder then he decided to run away. Maybe you couldn’t see it, but it’s obvious that things were moving too fast, and it freaked out your man.
He probably loves you and couldn’t say NO to you. That’s why he decided to take the easier way out – to pull away from you and your relationship.
3. Miedo al compromiso
This is definitely the most common reason men run away from relationships. They’re afraid of commitment, and once they find themselves in a committed relationship, they decide to head for the hills.
No importa lo mucho que quieran a su pareja, su miedo al compromiso es simplemente más grande que ese amor. They’ll try to cope with it in the beginning, but sooner or later, they’ll cave under its pressure and run away.
4. 4. Cuestiones personales
Men don’t like to talk about their personal issues and problems they may be dealing with in their private lives, especially not to someone they’ve just met or engaged in a relationship with.
Sometimes, it’s easier for them to pull away than be honest and upfront with their partners.
If your man has left without any logical reason, you need to be patient because maybe he’s going through a hard time right now. I agree that it’s not fair that he isn’t sharing it with you, but still, even if he hasn’t said it, he needs your understanding right now more than anything.
5. He isn’t ready to leave his single life behind
All that single life fun, all those single women, all that popularity on social media… Some men simply aren’t able to give up on their single lives, and that’s when they choose to run away from their relationships and go back to living the single life.
Si notas que tu hombre empezó a salir de fiesta más que nunca después de dejarte sin decir palabra, ahí tienes la razón (más que obvia) por la que huyó. Eligió la vida de soltero antes que a ti y tu amor.
6. Acaba de salir de una relación duradera
If a man has just ended a long-term, serious relationship, it may also be the reason he has pulled away from you. He entered a new relationship too soon, hoping it’d help him heal his wounds.
Desgraciada y obviamente, se equivocaba. Todos los expertos en relaciones coinciden en que lanzarse a una nueva relación demasiado pronto después de una ruptura nunca es la forma correcta de tratar los problemas de la ruptura y todas las heridas que tu ex-relación ha dejado en tu corazón y en tu alma.
7. He’s a player
Si un el hombre se aleja every now and then and comes back as if nothing happened, it’s possible that you’re dealing with a player. All the running away and coming back is just part of the manipulative methods and mind games he’s trying to play with you.
He thinks that he can come back knocking at your door every time and that you’ll let him in as soon as you hear those sweet words, “Te quiero.” And it’s probably because you gave him the right to think that way.
However, you should really think about it the next time you give him another chance. Giving someone a second chance is okay, but giving someone a tenth or hundredth chance is only a sign he’ll never change. Also, it’s a sign of how much (actually, little) he cares about you.
8. Problemas de autoestima
Cuando un hombre sufre de baja autoestima, nunca se puede predecir cuál será su próxima acción. En la mayoría de los casos, tampoco puede controlar ni predecir sus próximos movimientos.
Sus problemas de autoestima simplemente tienen pleno control sobre él. He completely loses faith in himself and starts believing that he isn’t deserving of true love and happiness. That’s why he may pull away from his SO and shut himself completely down emotionally.
It’s a well-known fact that self-esteem affects the testosterone levels in a man and vice versa. So, all you need to do is boost your man’s confidence, and he’ll come back to you in no time.
9. Heridas de relaciones pasadas
If a man was badly wounded by his ex-partner, he might be left with some issues and consequences from that past relationship. And if he doesn’t deal with them the right way, he’ll never be able to function in a new relationship.
Unfortunately, it’s difficult to recognize a man with such an emotional burden because men don’t show their emotional sides and vulnerabilities easily.
10. Falta de intimidad física
If you’ve decided to negar la intimidad en las primeras etapas de una relación, I’m not judging you, and I really respect your decision. And your partner should, too, but it’s possible that he got tired of waiting and decided to run away.
He probably isn’t used to withholding intimacy because he is used to other kinds of relationships. That’s why he decided to leave you and find another single woman who’ll please his physical needs.
If this is the case, you shouldn’t give up on your decision. Even if it means you could bring the man you love back, you shouldn’t go against your decision because not respecting your wishes only means he doesn’t respect or love you.
11. Cuestiones de confianza
If your man could never trust you, if you could never earn his trust no matter what you did, it’s a sign he’s dealing with deep trust issues. At first, he was able to handle those trust issues, but it’s obvious that he couldn’t do it anymore because he decided to run away.
You shouldn’t blame yourself. You didn’t provoke his trust issues. On the contrary, you did everything in your power to show him that you’re trustworthy.
12. Encontrar demasiadas banderas rojas
If a man notices too many red flags that you two aren’t quite compatible, especially en las primeras etapas de una relaciónpodría ser la razón por la que decide irse sin despedirse.
He doesn’t want to stay and waste his time on a relationship that clearly doesn’t have a future. Sin embargo, debería ser lo suficientemente hombre como para decírselo directamente a su compañero, no huir como un cobarde.
13. Suprimir sus verdaderos sentimientos
Cuando un hombre se enamora por primera vez de una mujer, ese sentimiento nuevo y fuerte puede asustarle. Por eso, decide reprimir esas emociones en lo más profundo y huir.
Piensa que sería más fácil ignorar y huir de esos sentimientos que quedarse y enfrentarse a ellos (como un hombre de verdad).
When a man feels in love, that’s when he is the most vulnerable. Because of his ego, he’ll try to hide that vulnerability by hiding and suppressing his feelings.
14. Se aburría
¿Sigue habiendo chispa? ¿O, por el contrario, tu relación está estancada en la rutina del aburrimiento?
Si la chispa ha desaparecido, es probable que su hombre se haya aburrido. Piensa que ya no queda nada por lo que merezca la pena luchar, ni siquiera sus sentimientos. Ve que os habéis distanciado el uno del otro y sabe que seguir en esa relación le romperá el corazón a él o a ti (o a los dos).
If that’s true, if there is no spark anymore, my relationship advice is to find a way to vuelve a encender esa chispa. Regain your man’s interest, and this time, try to keep him interested.
15. He’s had enough of your ghosting
Do you think that ghosting him will solve most of your relationship issues? I get you, and believe me, it’s the way most women think. However, it’s truly and deeply wrong.
Dándole el tratamiento del silencio o ghosting él podría ser contraproducente para usted, ya que sólo puede hacer que su hombre se vaya. He might see the ghosting as a lack of love from your side, and it’ll make him pull away.
If you’re having some issues, try to solve them by communicating them. You can’t just ghost your partner and hope he’ll get the point, that he’ll be able to read your mind and understand what you’re really trying to tell him.
16. Su posesividad y celos
¿Siente siempre la necesidad de saber cómo está su pareja? ¿Le envías una docena de mensajes de texto y le haces demasiadas llamadas a diario porque quieres saber dónde está en cada momento?
Lo siento, pero tengo que decírtelo: tu posesividad y aferramiento son las razones por las que tu hombre decidió huir. Your jealousy has probably broken each and every single one of his boundaries, and he’s just decided that it’s time to put an end to it.
La verdad es que la mayoría de los hombres consideran novias pegajosas y posesivas el peor tipo, y todos ellos tratan de evitar ese tipo de chicas.
If you have a bit of a clingy or possessive nature, you need to deal with it because you can try to hide it in the beginning, but sooner or later, it’ll come to the surface and make your man fly the coop.
17. Sus seres queridos están en contra de tu amor
Cuando un hombre decide huir de su pareja, una de las razones puede ser los malos comentarios que recibió de sus seres queridos sobre vuestra relación.
We all care deeply about our loved ones’ opinions, and even though we don’t allow them to control our lives, we appreciate their advice, as we should.
Sin embargo, si esta es realmente la razón por la que tu hombre se fue, deberías dejarlo ir because he didn’t even try to prove them wrong – he simply decided that it was easier to run away.
18. He thinks he doesn’t deserve you or vice versa
When a man believes he is unworthy of his partner or vice versa, he won’t be able to stay in that relationship for long. That feeling will start eating him up inside, and he won’t be able to withstand that pressure.
He’ll run away and probably go on a quest to find the right woman for him.
Even though it doesn’t seem like it to you right now, trust me, he made the right decision. It’s true that he doesn’t deserve you if he could leave you in such an awful way without saying goodbye.
7 consejos para conservar a tu hombre amado
It’s true that you can’t keep someone who wants to go, but there are some things you can do to keep your man interested so he never even thinks about running away.
1. Proporcione suficiente espacio para los dos
Si desea mantener el interés de un hombre, you need to give him enough space and time. The moment he starts feeling his independence is jeopardized, he’ll start thinking about running away.
Men who don’t have enough personal space in their relationships feel smothered – like their relationship is suffocating them.
If they don’t get the space they demand, they will eventually leave and never come back. It might be an issue for a man to express himself, but if te pide tiempo a solas...tienes que respetarlo y dejarle todo el tiempo que necesite.
2. Comunicar todo el tiempo
Tienes que estar y mantenerte en contacto pase lo que pase. Mediante una comunicación regular, podréis mantener una fuerte conexión y crear una confianza entre vosotros que nadie más podrá romper.
En el momento en que dejéis de comunicaros es cuando debéis empezar a preocuparos por el futuro de vuestra relación.
3. Confianza y comprensión
While you have his love and trust, you’ll never lose him. A man will never run or pull away from a woman he deeply loves and trusts.
Además, tienes que ser comprensiva y no dejar de demostrárselo. Habrá momentos en los que tu hombre se aleje de repente y sin motivo aparente, pero aun así debes mostrarte comprensiva en esos momentos.
It’s in those moments that a man realizes how lucky he is to have you, his soulmate, by his side.
4. Presta atención a sus necesidades sin descuidar las tuyas
You can’t and should never only prioritize your man’s needs. That won’t only harm your mental and emotional well-being, but it’ll also make your man think that you don’t respétate lo suficiente.
Tenéis que encontrar la manera de satisfacer vuestras necesidades, lo que hará que ambos seáis felices en vuestra relación.
5. Mantenga unas expectativas realistas
Los hombres huyen en cuanto ven que sus parejas se han creado expectativas demasiado grandes o poco realistas. It’s not that they don’t want to fulfill those expectations. They’re simply afraid that they won’t be able to and that it would cost them your respect and trust.
That’s why you need to mantenga el listón de las expectativas en un nivel realista. The more you get to know your man, the more you’ll be able to create and mold your expectations the right way.
6. Don’t ever forget to date him
It shouldn’t be just a relationship. You should never stop considering it dating, even when you decide to take it to the next level.
Necesita sigue coqueteando con tu hombre and seducing him like it’s the very first time you’ve seen him and wished he was your man. That’s the only way to keep him interested and in love with you forever.
7. Mantener viva la pasión
If you’re withholding intimacy, I’m sure you have your reasons, and I fully approve of it. However, you can’t completely avoid intimacy and hope it won’t negatively impact your relationship.
La intimidad física es enorme y una de las partes más importantes de una relación sana. Sin ella, una pareja nunca es capaz de construir y mantener una conexión fuerte y profunda.
Puesto relacionado: Cómo mantener el interés de un hombre: 15 formas eficaces de hacerlo
7 consejos para recuperar a tu hombre
Si tiene un fugitivo, es decir, si su hombre se ha largado o ha huido, he aquí algunos consejos útiles que podrían ayudarle a recuperarlo definitivamente.
1. El cambio empieza por trabajar en uno mismo
You can’t expect any change if you don’t start working on it. In other words, you can’t expect to get your man back if you aren’t willing to work on yourself and lightly change yourself, at least the parts that really bothered your partner.
I agree that you should never change for a man, but it’s always a good idea to improve some parts of yourself because I’m sure it’ll be reciprocated in the same way.
2. Despertar las mariposas en su vientre
¿Recuerdas cómo flirteabas con él cuando intentabas conquistarle? Pues tienes que volver a hacerlo, y esta vez tiene que ser aún mejor. Tienes que flirtea con él como una profesional.
That will remind your man of all the reasons he fell in love with you the first time and all the beautiful things you’ve been through together. He’ll immediately understand that nothing is worth losing you for, and he’ll come back to you crawling on his knees.
3. Déjale tomar la iniciativa esta vez
No hay nada malo en que seas tú quien dé el primer paso hacia la reconciliación. Sin embargo, si realmente quiere recupera a tu hombre...tienes que permitirle tomar la iniciativa esta vez.
He needs to believe that he is in control and that you have absolutely nothing against that. It’ll show him that you’ve really changed and, most importantly, that you truly trust him and want to keep him in your life.
4. Sal de tu zona de confort un poco más a menudo
The truth is, no man likes a boring girlfriend. If you were never up for adventure, if you didn’t want to travel with him, and if you never wanted to show an interest in his hobbies, then it’s truly no wonder he left you.
Su relación le aburría mortalmente y sabía que necesitaba salir de ella de una forma u otra. That’s why you need to show him how fun and interesting a woman you are, and he’ll come back to you immediately.
5. Despertar su héroe interior
Okay, you’re a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need anyone’s help, and I fully support that. However, sometimes you need to be a damsel in distress to get your man to notice you.
Don’t be shy about asking for his help or think that it makes you look weak. A los hombres les gusta ayudar a sus mujeres porque hace que aumenten sus niveles de testosterona, lo que se traduce en un aumento de la autoestima.
That way, you’re telling him that you really need him in your life – it’s like you’re giving him empowerment and encouragement to believe in himself more.
6. Sé paciente y afronta tus celos
Aunque lo quieras desesperadamente, debes tener en cuenta que habéis roto. You shouldn’t be jealous of other women around him because he’s single now and has every right to start dating someone else.
Actually, he might even test whether you’ve changed by flirting with other girls in front of you. If you make a jealous scene, you’ll fail his test, and he’ll never come back to you again.
7. Demuestra que mereces una segunda oportunidad
Nunca debes suplicar y humillarte para que alguien te dé una segunda oportunidad.
However, you should prove to them that you really deserve it and are ready to do things right this time, especially if you’re aware that your mistakes led to this breakup.
FAQS
¿Por qué los hombres se alejan cuando las cosas empiezan a ponerse serias?
El hecho desafortunado y bien conocido es que la mayoría de los hombres tienen miedo al compromiso. Las relaciones serias simplemente les asustan, y una vez que perciben que las cosas se están poniendo serias, ven la huida como su única opción.
They’re also afraid of their own feelings, especially when it’s the first time they fall sincerely in love with a woman. Being hurt by a loved one is the worst thing that could happen to any of us, and that’s precisely one of the reasons men pull away.
They think it’s the best way to protect themselves and their hearts, and I do get that in a way. However, I don’t and can’t understand when they pull away from a woman they deeply love because of the fear of saying goodbye to their single lives forever.
¿Los chicos huyen cuando se enamoran?
Sí, en la mayoría de los casos. Se asustan de sus propios sentimientos y deciden huir o alejarse mientras puedan.
Huir es su mecanismo de defensa favorito para evitar que les hagan daño. Al principio de la relación, todo son rosas y sol para ellos, pero cuando empiezan a enamorarse, se asustan y se van.
They can’t handle that emotional pressure and see running away as their salvation. Once they cool off, take some time to rethink it all, and gather the strength to deal with their emotions, fortunately, they do come back.
¿Cómo hacer que vuelva a perseguirte cuando se aleja?
En primer lugar, debes olvidarte de los juegos mentales que podrían haz que te persiga. Sooner or later, he’ll see through your true intentions, and your games will only make him distance himself further.
Necesitas recordarle a tu hombre todas las razones por las que te persiguió la primera vez. Tienes que recordarle todas las cosas de las que se enamoró.
Además, tienes que hacerle entender lo que está en juego. You need to point out what kind of woman he’s about to lose IF he doesn’t do anything about it. And if he doesn’t get it in time, you should let him go because he’ll have a lifetime to regret it.
Al final del día
Most men run away at some point in a relationship, and there aren’t too many things you can do to stop that. If he loves you, he’ll come back to you eventually, and if he doesn’t, it’s better for the both of you if he never comes back.
Understanding men and their reasons for fleeing isn’t an easy job because, in order to do that, you would need to step into their minds, and we all know how hard that is. I hope I’ve at least opened the door for you with this article.
You have every right to fight for a man you love. However, remember, if he has decided to run away, to flee forever, you shouldn’t waste your precious time clipping his wings.
Let him fly and hope he’ll fly far away from you, like “you never have to see him again” away. En lugar de intentar cortarle las alas, anímale a desplegarlas y volar muy, muy lejos de ti.
