Perché gli uomini tornano dopo mesi (19 motivi comuni)

Vi chiedete perché gli uomini tornano a distanza di mesi? Quale forza li ha spinti a scrivere quel messaggio o a fare quella telefonata? Ha un significato o sei solo sovrappensiero?

Una cosa è certa: significa qualcosa.

Your man’s reasons could either be selfish or he genuinely wants to be with you. However, even these two categories have too many subcategories.

And, it varies from man to man, so it’s up to you to analyze your situation with the help of this article.

Perché gli uomini tornano a distanza di mesi: 19 motivi

If you’re interested in knowing why exes come back into your life, consider the following reasons:

1. You’re the perfect woman.

It’s very simple. Your guy could come back because nobody else comes close. Maybe the connection he has with you is something he never experienced again.

So, he returns to your life because he feels like you’re the only one who understands him… his soulmate. He’s eager to show his real self to someone without being judged.

Overall, he feels like you’re the donna di alto valore che ha sempre cercato.

He left because he tried to find it elsewhere.. until he realized he’s had it all along.

2. Sa che lo amate ancora.

Sì, a volte i ragazzi tornano semplicemente perché possono farlo. Probabilmente il vostro uomo è consapevole dei sentimenti che provate per lui, ma comunque vi dà per scontati.

Ogni volta che ha bisogno di un spinta dell'ego, he’s back at your door. And, since you allow it to happen, he might do it repeatedly.

Questo tipo di uomo è troppo immaturo per una relazione, and doesn’t care if he’s hurting you.

All he knows is that you will always welcome him with open arms. He likes being loved by you, but doesn’t love you back.

3. Vuole solo sesso.

It’s sad, but possible. He either can’t find a sexual partner or is bored with the chase. So, what does he do?

He comes back to the person who’ll definitely give him what he wants.

And, since you’re a woman, naturally, you overthink. Volete che il sesso abbia un significato, quindi vi convincete che lui si faccia guidare dalle sue emozioni.

But, trust me… if he wanted something more than sex, he would let you know. He’s just non pronto per una relazione.

Romance doesn’t exist. You just made it up. And, you deserve more than a made-up story.

4. I ricordi lo perseguitano.

Forse il vostro ex fidanzato ha visto una vostra foto sui social media o un meme che gli ha ricordato i bei tempi andati. Forse gli è venuta in mente una battuta che avete detto una volta e che ha innescato un intero processo di pensiero.

Era combattere i suoi sentimenti per te and just HAD TO experience what you had together again. Not talking to you was something he couldn’t stand. He was ready for his fix.

But, that’s the problem. All you are to him is a fix.

Anche se nel profondo si preoccupa di voi, non appena avrà la sua parte di soddisfazione, sparirà di nuovo perché he doesn’t want a relationship con voi.

5. You’re a challenge.

A lot of the time, a man will come rushing back to you because he knows he can’t have you.

Sappiamo tutti che gli uomini sono pazzi per le donne difficili che continuano a rifiutarli.

If he has already tried hooking up with you, but you didn’t want him or gave him mixed signals, he’ll want to try again.

He can’t stand rejection, but at the same time, he’s incredibly attratti da voi.

He loves that you’re difficile da ottenere. E, nella sua mente, niente potrebbe farlo sentire meglio che conquistare il cuore di una donna simile.

6. L'hai superato.

This is one of the most common reasons why men come back months later – THEY JUST CAN’T STAND THAT YOU MOVED ON!

If your guy sees what a perfect little life you’ve created for yourself in his absence, he will hate that he’s not a part of it.

So, of course, he will gravitate towards you again, disrupting your peace. He’s not even serio su di te. This kind of man can’t stand being forgotten.

He comes back to remind you of his existence… to show you, or rather himself, that he’s worthy of being remembered.

7. Ti rivuole davvero.

That’s right. Maybe his return isn’t any kind of self-serving game. Maybe he’s genuinely a buon uomo che vuole tornare insieme.

La prima volta aveva dei dubbi, ma la regola dell'assenza di contatto gli ha fatto capire che ti ama.

Avete notato qualche segno che ti ama ancora? Hai la sensazione che lui voglia riaccendere la vostra vecchia relazione?

If you’re not sure about the answers, that’s fine. But, I’ll tell you one thing:

Fidatevi sempre del vostro intuito.

Francamente, se lo seguissimo tutti più spesso, staremmo meglio.

8. I suoi amici lo incoraggiarono.

Ah, you can never be fully immune to the opinions of other people. So, it’s quite possible your guy was told that leaving you was the biggest mistake he has ever made.

Driven by guilt, he reaches out again. But, that guilt doesn’t even come from him.

It’s all just someone else’s deed. He doesn’t think you’re the one for him – they do.

You know your guy the best. If he’s easily influenced, this might just be the reason why he came back to you.

9. His relationship isn’t fulfilling.

This one’s truly a classic. If he already has a girlfriend, but still reaches out to you, that means he isn’t quite as happy as he seems.

That’s a common reason why men come back months later.

There is something missing in his relationship… something his girlfriend can’t offer him, but you can. That may be emotional support or teasing.

Qualunque cosa sia, per lui è importante e ha bisogno di voi per soddisfare i suoi bisogni. Non appena lo farà, o lo farà rompere con la sua ragazza or leave you… again.

10. Being a player doesn’t cut it for him.

Some men are afraid of love. They don’t like letting someone in because that means they might end up hurt.

So, they choose the easier option – casual flings that don’t mean anything.

Maybe your guy decided to hook up with random women from dating apps because he’s paura di impegnarsi.

All he wanted was to have fun with one, and then move on to the next…

Se è tornato da voi, probabilmente ha avuto un'epifania.

Si è reso conto che essere un donnaiolo didn’t make him as happy as he thought it would. He wants something meaningful after all.

Sa che siete una donna di grande valore e finalmente è pronto a darvi il suo cuore.

11. He’s confused.

Men don’t always know what they want. Yours could genuinely be confuso sul modo in cui si sente su di te.

Maybe he isn’t even aware of his struggle, but something just pulls him towards you. He finds himself by your side without understanding what it really means.

Ma, innanzitutto, perché è confuso?

Well, he probably thinks he doesn’t have a chance, but is still tempted to talk to you.

Il suo obiettivo può essere o meno una relazione con voi, ma una cosa è certa: gli piacete molto.

12. Ha dei rimpianti.

You just can’t live without regretting certain choices, can you? That’s why men come back months later sometimes. They regret breaking up.

Forse il vostro uomo si è appena reso conto di quanto fosse bella la sua relazione con voi e ora vuole sistemare le cose. Vuole mostrarvi l'enorme errore che ha commesso.

You’ll know that this is his goal if he puts in a lot of effort to regain what he lost. The amount of effort equals his love for you.

Sareste pronti a dargli un'altra possibilità?

13. He’s just bored.

Well, isn’t that just peachy?! A man reaching out to you because he is too lazy to start a new relationship! Imagine being nothing but someone’s entertainment.

That probably hurts a lot, especially if you care about him. But, unfortunately, you’re going to have to care about yourself more.

No matter how much you love him, realize that you are nothing to him but a way to kill his boredom. He doesn’t value what you have to offer. He just doesn’t know where else to look.

Do you really want to be someone’s option? Will you accept a guy who only gives you the minimo indispensabile?

14. He doesn’t have anybody else.

It just gets sadder, doesn’t it? The reason why men come back months later could also be a lack of female company.

He probably doesn’t have a girlfriend nor did he meet anyone new who intrigued him. So, what does he do? He goes back to someone he will surely enjoy – you.

I know a part of you is flattered, but it really shouldn’t be. This guy isn’t serious about you. He’s just using you because he doesn’t like the single life.

He left you because he didn’t care enough about you in the first place, and it’s unlikely he will care this time.

This doesn’t mean you are flawed and undeserving of him. On the contrary, he is undeserving of YOU.

Dovreste accettare solo un uomo che viene da voi perché nessun altro può reggere il confronto; un uomo che vi faccia la sua priorità.

15. He’s finally ready to be with you.

Just because you want a great love life doesn’t mean you’re ready for it. Sometimes, you need a second time.

The sad truth is that you can’t be in a relazione sana unless you’re at peace with yourself. I mean, you can, but it will be very difficult.

Forse il vostro caro aveva bisogno di molto tempo per ritrovare se stesso. Forse era troppo emotivamente sbilanciato, which didn’t allow him to be with you at the beginning.

Probabilmente ha pensato che sarebbe stato meglio separare le vostre strade finché non fosse diventato una persona migliore.

E, ora che è cresciuto, è finalmente in grado di amarvi nel modo in cui ha sempre desiderato.

16. Qualcuno parlava di te.

It’s always a pain when someone randomly mentions a person you once loved and lost. And, sometimes the heartbreak is so great that you decide to reach out to them.

This could be the reason why your guy couldn’t resist talking to you again. Tutti i ricordi gli tornarono alla mente e volle provare quello che aveva provato un tempo con te.

Se lo fa, vuol dire che ci tiene molto a te. Nessuna quantità di tempo o di distanza può farvi uscire dalla sua testa. Basta una sola parola perché lui ti mandi un altro messaggio o ti chiami.

Still, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he will stay. Chances ARE high if he has done it this one time, but if he keeps coming back, that’s a major red flag.

Perhaps he loves you… just not in the way you deserve.

17. La sua relazione è fallita.

When your relationship ends, it’s natural to seek comfort. People do it by talking to friends, drinking a bit too much… or simply going back to their ex-girlfriend who will always have them.

I know this isn’t the answer you were looking for, but you might just be his consolation prize.

He probably lost the one he wanted and didn’t know where else to go. The only one who came to mind was you.

Trust me, you deserve so much more than being with someone who comes to you because you’re the only one available.

No matter how much you care about him, have enough self-control not to be there for him. Even if you’re dying to have a chat, be stronger than your desire.

He doesn’t deserve even five minutes of your time. Devote it to someone who will be with you because they can’t imagine being with anyone else.

18. He’s going through a guilt trip.

Ti ha ferito l'ultima volta che avete parlato? La stava tradendo?

Se la vostra relazione è finita male, è possibile che lui si dia ancora la colpa. Quindi, per alleviare la sua coscienza, cerca te.

Potreste pensare che il vostro ex voglia stare di nuovo con voi, ma se è tornato solo per placare i suoi pensieri, le sue motivazioni sono in realtà egoistiche.

He doesn’t care about how you feel. He just can’t stand that he feels bad over what he did to you.

If he did care, he wouldn’t be in your life again because he knows his return might ruin the peace you have created without him.

But, your peace isn’t on his priority list, even though he might convince himself that it is.

Coming back into someone’s life on a whim is never the right thing to do.

19. He’s just checking up on you.

No, the reason why men come back months later isn’t always that deep. Even if he wants to talk to you, that doesn’t necessarily mean that he holds any value to those conversations.

Maybe it just occurred to him: ”Oh, I haven’t talked to her in a while! I’ll see what she’s up to.”

Of course, there’s nothing bad with checking up on people. But, if it hurts you every time he comes back, don’t allow it to happen again.

La salute mentale viene prima di tutto.

Pensieri finali

Hopefully, it has become much clearer to you why men come back months later. Every man is different, and it’s up to you to realize the motives of your ex.

However, it’s very important to be honest with yourself. Don’t paint the picture prettier than it is. Don’t mistake his attention for love.

Ogni esperto di relazioni vi direbbe la stessa cosa:

Even if it’s killing you inside, you deserve to be treated like a queen. If you’re not his priority, don’t let him be in your life any longer.

Il modo in cui ti tratta è molto più importante di quello che provi per lui.