According to all the parameters, having a high libido is not a bad thing. After all, everyone’s ultimate fantasy is having a sexual partner who is always in the mood.
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In addition, sexual arousal is perfectly normal for every healthy human being.
All of us have periods when we’re incredibly horny and when sex is the only thing we can think of, especially during those longer ‘dry’ periods. Besides, sexual energies differ from one person to another.
Just because you want to get laid more often than your girlfriend or boyfriend doesn’t mean that you’re suffering from a hypersexual disorder, and it is nothing but a sign of sexual incompatibility between the two of you.
However, if your sex desire starts controlling you and becomes your main obsession, it is clear that something is off and that you should make some concrete moves to resolve your problem.
No matter how much sex you have, you always want more and you’re never fully satisfied.
What you need is to find the source of all the sexual energy you have, and it’s always hidden in other aspects of our lives.
With Language of Desire, you can learn the exact ways to release sexual tension in a healthy, satisfying way, without ever changing who you are.
Whatever you’re doing, sex is always somewhere in the back of your head.
Wherever you are and whatever situation you find yourself in, you get aroused out of the blue, without any stimuli.
Sounds familiar? Well, if this is something you can relate to, read on because we’re about to give you 10 of the most effective bits of advice on how to stop being horny and reduce your sexual drive.
Admit that you have a problem
It is natural for a healthy human being to feel sexual tension next to someone they’re attracted to, but if your thoughts and impulses are beginning to control you, it is time to do something about it.
The first step in the process of dealing with your constant arousal is accepting that you have a problem and that you being horny all the time is making your life more difficult.
You see, there is no point in denial. If you try pretending that your constant horniness doesn’t exist, you won’t chase it away. Instead, slowly, it will take more and more control over your life.
Of course, you won’t diagnose yourself by just comparing your arousal with your partner’s because there is a possibility that there is nothing wrong with you and that you just happened to run into someone who has a different libido than yours.
Instead, you can start with talking to your closest friends and asking them about their sexual desires or investigating online how often other people are horny.
Is your sexual drive really above the average? If it is, how long has this been lasting?
Once you get all the answers you need, it is time to think things through and see whether you’re indeed ready to make some changes regarding your high sex drive. Are you decisive enough to stick to your decisions?
Find out the reason for your constant arousal
Before trying to find the solution to any problem, firstly, you have to get to the bottom of its cause.
The same goes with your hornyness: you can’t work on it until you understand why it’s happening.Is this just a phase you’ve fallen into or is it a permanent state?
Are you horny due to a lack of sex or does your constant arousal continue even when you have a regular sex life? Are you experiencing some health problems?
Has something out of the ordinary happened in your life lately that might cause this change of behavior?
If you’re a woman, are you in the middle of your menstrual cycle and is there a possibility of you being pregnant?
Is your bladder full most of the time and are you using birth control pills?
There are many different reasons for someone being always horny and some of them include health or psychological problems, medications such as birth control pills, as well as the aphrodisiac food you might be eating without even being aware of the impact it has on you.
Masturbate less often
When you’re turned on all the time, it is normal that you’re in a constant search for satisfaction, which you never seem to get.
You’ve tried everything but none of your sexual partners have managed to give you what you want, so it has become your body’s natural response to try pleasing itself.
To be honest, ever since you can remember, you’ve been masturbating a lot.
Of course, masturbation is not a bad thing, and it is perfectly normal, especially in the teen years when you’re investigating things, exploring your body and sexuality, and looking for the things which suit you the best.
There is nothing weird in pleasuring yourself even while you have a regular sex partner and it is definitely not a sign that they’re not enough for you—after all, you’re allowed to have some time for yourself, whether you’re single or taken.
However, masturbating too often can be a problem and a surefire sign that something is off.
I know you see this as the best way of reducing your stress level after a long, busy day at work, but if playing with yourself becomes the only thing you care about and you notice it is your main obsession, it is time to slow things down.
I’m not advising you to stop with these activities once and for all because that would only increase your horniness.
However, trying to masturbate less often is the number one piece of advice most experts will give you if you’re trying to figure out what to do about your high libido.
For starters, lose the vibrator and other sex toys. Stop perceiving them as the only source of your physical pleasure and understand that you don’t actually need them to satisfy your sexual urge.
Don’t make any drastic changes at first. If necessary, make a journal of your activity and follow your progress.
Write down the number of times you wanted to touch yourself, the number of times you actually masturbated and the number of times you resisted the urge to do so.
Trust me—before you know it, you’ll be proud of how much you have accomplished.
Have regular sex
According to research, most people experience excessive hornyness due to long periods of sexual abstinence.
You know how you always obsess over the things you can’t have and which appear unreachable to you?
Well, the same goes with sex as well. If you feel the lack of it, you start missing it so badly that it takes control over your life completely.
However, what is even worse than not having sex at all is going through on and off periods.
When you’re out of sex for a longer period of time, after a while, you get used to living without it.
Nevertheless, if you often engage in short casual relationships, when you just get crumbs of sex, your desire increases.
The moment you get used to having sex, you enter a dry period without your sexual urge being fully satisfied.
Therefore, one of the best cures for constant arousal is definitely a regular sex life.
This doesn’t mean that you should enter a committed relationship just to have someone to sleep with all the time: it will be enough to find a sex buddy who isn’t likely to go anywhere anytime soon or to engage in a longer-lasting. no strings attached kind of relationship.
What is also important is to try looking for a partner who has similar sexual energy as yours.
If you run into someone with a significantly lower libido level, you won’t achieve anything, and you’ll keep on feeling the same frustration.
When you start having sex for the first time after a while, your sexual desire won’t lower right away.
After all, this is something you’ve been craving for so long, and it is only natural to be excited over finally getting it.
Nevertheless, whether you believe it or not, after a while, you’ll get enough of constant sex.
It will become a part of your routine, something you don’t have to fight for anymore, something you don’t have to wait for, and consequently, it will become less interesting.
If you happen to find a romantic and sexual partner all in one and if you see that you can trust this person, it would be a good idea to share your problems with them.
Of course, you won’t tell them all the details right away because they might perceive you as a maniac who is only after one thing, and your confession will probably chase them away.
However, after a while, this person can become your number one ally in resolving your problem.
After all, they’re highly impacted by it as well, and they deserve to know the truth.
Take a shower
Another effective way to struggle with your increased sexual energy is to take an ice cold shower every time you get incredibly horny.
Cold water will calm you down and trick your body into stopping to feel horny. However, there are some problems with this solution.
First and foremost, you can only take a shower when you’re home.
Therefore, this approach can’t help you when you get aroused at work, at the club or anywhere where you don’t have access to the bathroom.
Secondly, this is not a permanent solution, and it can only help you in the short run.
Yes, taking a cold shower will make you less horny in a split second, but it won’t solve the core of your problem in any way.
Be physically active
Physical activity is for most, the number one cure for constant arousal.
To put things simply: you need to get your body tired to the point when it won’t have any strength left to be in the mood for sex.
Instead of, for example, going for a run every time you are turned on, it is much better to introduce exercise into your daily routine.
You can hit the gym, start speed walking, hiking or riding a bike every day—whatever you like the most and whatever drains you the most.
Another good idea is to adapt your workout timetable with the schedule of your sexual arousal.
Before you begin with your physical activities, start a journal in which you’ll take notice of the time of the day in which you’re usually the horniest.
Once you do that, try fitting your exercises into your schedule before that period of the day, so you’ll prevent your sex drive from even appearing.
Keep your mind busy
The truth is that your body is the one which expresses your sexual desire: you get wet, hard or you feel the ejaculation coming in completely non-sexual situations.
However, this entire process is fully controlled by your brain, which you should focus on reprogramming if you want to resolve your problem successfully in the long run.
The best way to do this is to keep your mind as busy as possible. Every time sex comes through your head, focus your thoughts on something else.
I won’t lie to you—this will be difficult at first, but with some practice, you’ll accomplish it.
Just remember that you’re an intelligent human being who is in control of his own thoughts, desires, emotions and impulses—it is not the other way around.
Also, try finding some relaxing techniques which work for you the best.
Create a habit of reading every night before bed time, sleep with some relaxing music on, and spend more time in nature.
Meditation is another great solution for many problems, including this one.
Besides reducing your stress levels and giving you a hand with elevating yourself above your bodily urges, it also helps you regain the self-control you desperately need.
When you first start meditating, sex will probably be the only thing on your mind.
However, after a while, you’ll learn to chase your unwanted thoughts away.
Meditation will also teach you some breathing techniques and exercises which can help you in your time of need.
Your situation is actually similar to having a panic attack: you have to focus on anything besides your sex desire until it goes away.
Once you learn to meditate and do yoga, you’ll know how to concentrate on breathing properly instead of thinking about your arousal.
Every time you feel you’re about to get turned on, relax your entire body, especially your neck and shoulders.
Inhale air through your nose, and then slowly exhale it through your mouth as if you’re about to whistle.
There are also some breathing techniques which demand that your inhales and exhales have the same duration.
For example, inhale for a count of three and exhale for a count of three, as well.
Change your diet
As it was already stated, there is some aphrodisiac food which highly increases your sexual desire, and if you’re trying to figure out how to stop being horny, the answer is in changing your diet.
Even in ancient times, people used these nutrients to increase their libido and you want to do the opposite, so it means there are some foods you should cut out of your diet.
Asparagus, waterlemon, almonds, oysters, figs, chilli peppers and strawberries are all likely to increase your sex desire.
Also, if you noticed that alcohol (especially wine) tends to put you in the mood, it is a good idea to reduce it or stop drinking for a while.
Firstly, you have to keep track of your meals and compare the things you eat with the level of your sexual energy.
The moment you see that a certain type of food increases your sexual tension, it is a sign for you to stop eating it as soon as possible.
Turn your fantasies into reality
Many people have high sexual urges out of one simple reason: they’re not satisfied with the quality of their sex life.
It is possible that your partner has a lower libido than you do or that you’re not sexually compatible in other ways.
If you’re into some unusual, kinky stuff and have a hard time finding a person who shares your fantasies, this can leave you unsatisfied.
That is why all the experts advise you to try and turn your sexual dreams into reality because that might be the thing to help you reduce your sexual desire.
Once you stop daydreaming about something and actually make it happen, it will stop being so unattainable for you, and you’ll probably stop being hooked on it.
Get help
The last but definitely not the least piece of important advice includes getting help for your problem.
Yes, you can try all the advice mentioned above, but if you notice that you’re not going anywhere and that you’re not capable of helping yourself without anyone’s hand, it is time to reach out for assistance.
Firstly, you can try talking to your friends and see if they’re dealing with something similar.
Of course, you won’t talk about this with anyone who crosses your path because these things are personal and sensitive.
However, I’m sure you have some close friends you can confide in.
Don’t be scared that they’ll judge you—after all, true friends should be there to understand us at all times.
I’m not claiming that they will give you a solution because they’re not experts.
However, you might start looking at this entire situation from a different point of view or maybe hear some valuable advice.
The next step is to go to see a doctor. There are some medications which impact one’s sexual desire, and it wouldn’t be bad to consult an expert who will tell you whether you should use it or not.
After that, check your hormone status and the state of your body in general.
It is possible that you’re suffering from a hormonal disbalance which makes you feel this way.
If everything is in perfect order, it’s time to pay a psychotherapist a visit because there is a chance that this situation is connected with your mental health.
There is a possibility that you suffer from a hypersexual disorder which can be caused by different things, including a trauma from the past.
No, you’re not crazy or sick for going through this: you’re just a perfectly normal person handling some issues.Don’t worry—none of this is something you should be ashamed of.
Even if you are dealing with some type of disorder, it is nothing that can’t be successfully cured and definitely not something you should feel less worthy for.
The most important thing is to get the help you need, to put an end to this, and to regain your self-control.