Remaining vulnerable after being hurt feels like going into battle without any armor.

No matter how good a fighter we are, we could still get hurt. But it’s a risk we’re willing to take knowing love is a basic need.

That’s what I did. I was hurt but I chose to love again…and I was hurt again.

woman in white dress squatting near gray concrete wall

I don’t regret it.

Love is often accompanied by pain. Pain is frowned upon and people avoid it like the plague. But they still want love.

However, to go through the pain means to choose love.

woman in black top with blonde hair near the field

At one point, when I hadn’t yet realized that, I cursed your name and I cursed love.

I cursed myself for falling for the same thing again and again.

I spent my days in bed, crying. I felt nauseous when I didn’t eat for days.

My head swam with thoughts I couldn’t say out loud. My heart was in pieces. I was in pain.

woman in gray tank top sad in the bed embracing her legs

Later on, I learned that emotional pain manifests itself physically to remind us we need healing. Our bodies are miraculous.

That’s what happened. Time passed and I started to heal.

I accepted that life is messy and hard to understand.

woman wearing white dress wrapping around her

But sometimes, at the moment when you’re least expecting it little pieces start coming together and forming a coherent whole.

That’s when you start to connect the dots of your experiences and understand the answer to the question you’ve asked so many times: Why me?

In that moment your pain fills up with meaning and you understand that there are times when love can only be found through pain.

lonely woman in autumn sitting near the lake

Though I learned about pain through leaving, I learned that pain can be more subtle.

Pain can be uncertainty about the future, expectations we can’t meet, unconscious trauma, a letdown.

Nonetheless, through pain, love wants to prepare us. It wants us to widen our perspective and deepen our capacity.

closeup photo of a woman in dark room

It teaches us we can’t be defeated.

Both love and pain teach us that life consists of good and bad and that everything in life is a chance to grow towards something greater or step back into the soil.

It depends on our choice.

woman leaning at the table with hands on her chin

To go through the pain and heal is to understand the true meaning of love.

Love is unexpected and it doesn’t know limits. Everyone has their own way of finding it.

That’s why it’s okay to search for the kind of love you need.

woman holding on railings leaning in sepia color

It’s okay to search for a person who understands the way you love and need to be loved.

However, the true qualities of love are always the same.

True love doesn’t hurt you on purpose. True love doesn’t lie to you.

beautiful woman with hat with tall grass in front of her

True love accepts you despite your flaws. True love sees beyond your body.

True love isn’t scared when the thing goes wrong. True love accepts the feeling of pain and every other imperfect emotion.

It’s wise enough to know that perfect doesn’t exist and imperfection is always a chance for growth.

lonely blonde woman in coat head turning right

When you meet the love you need, you’ll know it.

A man who gives you that love will make sure to choose you every day and won’t make you question his feelings.

He will never fail to remind you how important and precious you are.

woman sitting with her hand on her cheek near windows

He will take care of you and boost your confidence just because he loves to see you happy.

He will respect you always and forever because he sees your true worth.

In his mind and heart, you will be the only one he sees.

lonely woman on a steel boom gate near in the country side

When that happens, you will thank your pain and embrace newfound love.

Everything that happened before will be just a shadow that vanishes when you’re surrounded by light.

You’ll smile because rather than let the pain turn your heart into something ugly you allowed it to blossom into love.

EVERY PAIN OF LOSS TELLS A STORY OF LOVE