Whoever said that men and women come from different planets knew exactly what they were talking about.
We are just wired differently and, more often than not, we masterfully miscommunicate things.
In addition to that, the dating world today has become a man’s world and it seems like women are running a greater risk of getting hurt in this difficult game of love.
The thing is we don’t want to play games; we don’t want to resort to manipulation tactics to get the man of our dreams.
The good news is we don’t have to do that… but we have to do something.
We have to start dating like men.
And the best way in which we can achieve that is to try and understand them.
I know it sounds impossible, but it’s really not all that complicated. We have to refuse to play games and adopt the things that they are good at.
1. Don’t chase… become chasable
Have you noticed that the more you chase after something in life, the quicker it gets away from you.
Well, men are the same. They are born hunters and they lose interest or get intimidated if they feel like prey.
On the other hand, if they find a woman who possesses the traits they like, they will pursue her and they won’t stop at anything to win her over.
If you wonder how to become chasable, it’s actually quite easy – and I’ll be brutally honest here – live your own life.
Don’t quit on your dreams, friends, or interests.
Look at him as your equal and not someone on a pedestal. Invest as much as he does; don’t overdo it.
Make him a part of your life, not your whole universe.
2. Kick it down a notch or two
Women tend to go above and beyond when they are really into someone, so they exaggerate.
They try to hard, while the other side does nothing. If you see yourself in this description, it’s time to kick it down a notch or two.
Follow his lead. Invest as much as he is investing.
Don’t send a follow-up text when he is not responding. Don’t plan a night out if he isn’t planning one.
This is not about playing games, it’s about something much more important and that’s RECIPROCITY.
3. Avoid gray areas
Men hardly ever find themselves in the gray area. To them, it’s all black and white and they are quite clear about what they want.
That’s one of the parts of dating like a man that is essential to adopt. When you are meh about someone, don’t date them at all.
When you detect the red flags and see some behavior in a man you don’t wish to tolerate, cut them out of your life.
Men do that; they don’t even need a reasonable explanation. When something doesn’t feel good, they move on.
4. Don’t treat him like your boyfriend until he mans up and says he is completely yours
Before you know for sure that the two of you are exclusive, keep your options open.
God knows men always do and that makes them deal with getting rejected less painful.
Why wouldn’t you do the same or something similar?
You can date other people at the same time and explore your options, or you can just keep casually in contact with other men you find attractive.
You never know how it will all end and it’s always good to have options at the end of the day.
5. Switch into “Thank you, next” mode
Men will also wallow a bit if they get rejected by the woman they are into. But before you know it, they will get back out there and start dating again.
If you’ve been on a few dates with someone and they disappeared on you, there is no reason for you to look at the empty screen waiting for a text.
There are plenty of men out there, made from flesh and bones, who would be more than happy to be a part of your life.
A man who doesn’t see that doesn’t deserve a place in your world.
6. Don’t flaunt your flaws
You probably never heard a man talking about the things that make him feel insecure early on in the relationship.
They know that if it works out, there will be plenty of time to do that.
So they will do their best to impress you and point out their strengths and virtues.
Men are onto something here.
By being too open right from the start, you are not just making yourself vulnerable, you are also casting a depressive note on your whole dating experience.
So, keep the topics fun and breezy. The serious stuff will come later as you get to know one another.
Also, things you consider your flaws might be far from it in his eyes. Let him decide the way in which he perceives you.
7. Don’t settle for someone who is not “The One” for you
You probably never heard a story about a man who settled for less because he was in his 30s and it was time to get hitched, have babies, or at least move in with a girlfriend.
This scenario happens so rarely that it almost sounds like a myth.
Don’t settle for less than true love because you are scared of loneliness, because “it’s time,” or because society expects something from you.
It’s a pressure you don’t need in your life.
Silence all the snarky comments and all your inner fears and just follow your heart.
Don’t date Mr. Wrong and don’t stay with him; you miss out on the real deal.
When you are with someone right, you’ll know it and you will have no doubt about it.
Leah Lee – Writer. Dreamer. Adventurer. Eternal Optimist.
I am an English language and literature professor and writing came naturally alongside that. It was something I did for me until I decided to share it with the rest of the world.
I write about love, emotions, relationship issues and ways to solve them and most importantly about empowering women to become the best versions of themselves.
My inspiration comes from all that I’ve been through in life, and it was a bumpy road but full of valuable lessons. I hope that my experience will do some good to all of those who like to read my work.