Like most people in this world, I’ve definitely had my fair share of problems with rejection.
It’s never easy being rejected in any way, especially when it’s by a romantic partner. That one hits the hardest, for sure.
But as I look into the past, I realize I haven’t always had a healthy coping mechanism.
I’ve always taken things too personally and let them affect me way more than they should have.
No matter what anyone says, we all deal with this at some point in our life.
Rejection is an inevitable part of growing up and maturing and the sooner you learn to handle it correctly, the sooner you’re going to feel ten times more liberated!
It hurts and that’s a sad fact. But it doesn’t have to be that bad, trust me!
I have learned from my past mistakes and now I can honestly say, it doesn’t phase me that much!
All it takes is the right outlook on the situation and once you’ve mastered that, you’ll see how irrelevant it really is.
Because being rejected doesn’t say anything about you, nor does it diminish you in any way!
It’s almost always about the other person and their own issues. And once I saw all that, the weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
I’d love to share with you my healthy approach to dealing with rejection, so here are 7 habits that helped me deal with rejection in a truly healthy manner!
1. Take time to process what happened and don’t force a smile until you truly feel like smiling
The first step is to process what took place. Take time to think about what happened and why.
Don’t feel bad about yourself, just try to see it from the other person’s point of view.
If it had something to do with you, try to embrace it and learn from it.
And if you feel like you didn’t deserve this and it’s not fair to be going through this, don’t let out your anger, because it’s not going to change the situation.
Stay calm, accept that this is your new reality and let yourself feel whatever you are feeling.
Don’t force yourself to be happy until you truly get to that place and find your smile again.
2. Accept this loss and focus on all the good things you still have in your life
Being rejected sucks and nobody expects you to just be okay with it and move on.
That’s seriously unhealthy. You need time to clear your head and find yourself again and nobody can take that away from you.
But don’t dwell on it. Keep your mind busy. Remind yourself of all the people and things you still have in your life.
Let them help you see your worth again.
For as long as you’re stuck on this rejection and refuse to focus on any other positive thing in your life, it’s going to be difficult moving forward and embracing this new change.
Take your time healing but help yourself by focusing on other positives in your life.
3. Silence your inner critic and don’t let it get you down
The little voice in your head is going to try and make you feel bad about yourself.
It’s going to make it seem like it was your fault and there’s something wrong with you.
Don’t let it. Overpower it with new, positive thoughts!
Silence it whenever it starts messing with your head. It’s just your insecurities talking and they have no business making you feel this bad.
We all go through this and it’s perfectly normal to feel what you’re feeling.
Nobody is perfect and nobody can say they have never been rejected in their life. It happens, people move on and life gets back on track!
Believe it and you’ll see it!
4. Vent to a close friend whenever you start feeling bad about yourself
That’s what friends are for! Instead of letting your negative thoughts get to you, stop it from happening and go see a friend!
Talk to her for as long as you need and once you get all those negative thoughts out into the world, it’s going to feel so much better!
The power of a conversation with a trusted individual is all the therapy you need sometimes!
5. Accept that it may have everything to do with them and nothing to do with you
Maybe the other person is going through something difficult and simply cannot be bound to anyone at this particular time.
Perhaps they are filled with self-doubt and insecurities and they need time to deal with their own shit because they don’t want to project it all onto you!
It could very well be for your own benefit and isn’t that kind of reassuring and selfless on their part?
Accept this as a genuine possibility of being the case and you’ll instantly feel okay again.
6. Take this as an opportunity to learn something about yourself and possibly improve
If it had something to do with you, think a bit about what it was and assess if that is something you could perhaps improve on.
Are you impatient or easily annoyed? Do you have trouble letting go and fully investing yourself?
Whatever it is, let it be your chance to improve on that potential issue.
This can be a really positive learning experience if you let it!
7. Remember that what you’re feeling is temporary and it is most definitely going to pass
You could be going through a challenging time but in a few weeks, you could literally be a whole new girl.
Don’t let your current mood let you believe that this is how it’s going to be from now on.
Like everything in life, this too shall pass.
You are going to get better and sooner rather than later you will meet someone new and with a little bit of time, you’ll be able to see this as a minor bump in the road!
You’ll accept it for what it was, nothing more and nothing less.
Right now, it sucks and you need to process it. But next month, you are going to be smiling again and this will be just a thing of the past.