You are a nice, pretty, and entertaining woman. People say you are a catch. You manage well at every social gathering and both men and women adore you for your charismatic personality.
However, your beloved has left you for another woman and both your heart and ego are left broken.
How could he ever leave you when you were so right for him and you two were such a fun couple? It’s like that Beyonce song says “Even your friends say I’m a good woman, all I need to know is why?”
You are left confused and shattered, and your self-esteem is now at an all-time low. You stop believing in yourself and you think she is far better than you, even when others try to point out all your advantages.
So, here are a few steps on how to avoid comparing yourself to her:
1. Move away from her social media page
That could be the hardest part because people today are keen on putting everything on social media and we all have a bit of voyeur in us.
By visiting her and his pages, you will most likely see some photos of them together and burst into tears again. Everyone puts idyllic photos on social media – remember, it’s not real!
You should block them both or even step away from your own FB or IG page for a while.
2. Stop asking around about her
You might pretend that you are not interested in her and his lives anymore, but we all now that you are dropping her name on purpose.
Rather be involved in your own life and the lives of your friends and family. She is not the center of your universe; she is not an important person at all.
3. Don’t compare your physical appearance to hers
She might be prettier, taller, or younger and therefore have glowing skin, but you are a beautiful individual with your own features and personal style. You shouldn’t need to crave someone else’s looks.
If it was her looks that made your ex leave you, than you are a happy person for not being with him anymore because he is so superficial.
You should actually feel sorry for her because he might do the same again if she gets old or fat.
4. Stop blaming yourself
If you thought your relationship was going pretty okay and you never saw any big issues, then you are better off without him. He is not a confident person and he might ditch you at even worse timing.
It is not your fault that she stumbled into his world at that moment and he didn’t have the guts to confront you or try to mend things. He was the one running away and she obviously had no concerns with him being involved with you – that’s her issue.
5. She is not perfect
There is no chance on earth that she is the prettiest, smartest, or even kindest girl he will ever meet.
She might have ugly feet, sport a bad temper when drunk, not be able to cook his favorite meal as well as you do. She might cheat on him or they might even get married in a month, who knows.
Soon he will realise that she is not as perfect as he thought. She might become similar to you in his eyes and he might end up cheating on her with another woman. Nevertheless, she is not perfect, because no one is!
At the end of the day, if he left you like that, he was never good enough for you. And he is obviously not mature enough because he doesn’t want to fix things, just replace them.
And she might get replaced too – or not. Regardless, ask yourself if you would have stayed with your ex after all. Maybe those two deserve each other.
The point is, you should never change your appearance or interests to make someone love you or try to copy the other woman, thinking she’s doing everything better.
Sooner or later, she will fade and he will realize that she is not that special to begin with.
And you? You just work on yourself, stay true to yourself, and go meet new people!